


Not That Perfect

by Useless_girl



Category: Depeche Mode
Genre: Angst, Dark, Drama, F/M, M/M, Multi, Romance, Threesome - F/M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-11
Updated: 2013-07-11
Packaged: 2017-12-19 04:09:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 21
Words: 74,186
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/879300
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Useless_girl/pseuds/Useless_girl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Note by Capri: Well yes… we couldn’t stop ourselves and had to take another kinky dive with the boys and hmmm… we love these kind of stories :D I hope you’ll like it too. This was our fifth longer story after one year of writing together :P Our work relationship seems to be indestructible! XD </p><p>Note by Useless-girl: We wanted something special – the title indicates it. It won’t be like our other stories. After a few twists it’ll fold out why not. There are new things we’ve put into this one. Things that we’ve never used before. And the boys getting into the studio to make their last album (SOTU) gave nice inspiration to the story…. Life took mercy on us…</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Capricornus and Useless-girl:

Not that perfect

 

1.

A long, boring night. She let her bored gaze wander around the room with enormous sizes. Within half an hour it’ll be full with suited men and women wearing fancy dresses. Snooty rich people. She felt sick even from thinking on them as she maneuvered a big tray between the skinny women, offering snacks with a wry smile. She got used to the disdainful looks. She could think only on her salary and how she’ll have to divide until the end of the month so there’d be enough money for her studies too. When someone’s twenty years old it’s rare that someone can live into the world carelessly. She still can’t drink alcohol or drive without a presence of an adult. But she didn’t think that these things made someone an adult. She lives alone, pays her rent and for school and takes care of herself. She wished it wasn’t this difficult.

As she eyed herself in a long mirror, she saw an unlucky disaster named Anita staring back at her. She was relatively tall – 172 centimeters, but she weighted around 70 kg. Her straight black hair was long – reached to her waist. She was nothing charming, attracting or beautiful. She had no boyfriend, but she didn’t even need it. Her cat and those few plants she was able to keep alive made up for everything.

She was doing casual job tonight – like usually. Now she was playing the waitress. She had to wear skirts, although she hated it despite its black color. Her boss’ voice dragged her back into reality – it was time to open the doors. She suppressed a sigh and went to her place next to her actual workmate behind the counter. If it was needed, they were immediately able to refill the glasses with chilled, sparkling champagne. She wished she could drink one too to be able to live through this long night filled with suffering, but of course she couldn’t do it. Her sense of obligation was way stronger than that and after all if she was busted, she wouldn’t have got her money and in that case she would’ve had to cut back on everything until next month. So she just put on a painted little smile and watched as the room got filled with the world of sparkling dresses, diamonds and brills, which were unreachable to her.

She knew even before her boss that he’ll send her out with the tray. They always send her. She always felt as if everyone was laughing on her behind her back and maybe she wasn’t that wrong about that. She stopped looking over her shoulder: it would’ve been too obvious. She had learned how to hide the glimpses she made time after time. If she heard laughing, she automatically disappeared from there and started thinking about what she could’ve screwed up this time or what was so funny about her again.

And yes, when her boss waved to her, she sighed and lifted up a tray to move towards the crowd. She adjusted her expression, put on her smile and mingled between the laughing and drinking guests. It wasn’t dinner time yet. That’d be the smaller death of hers – during dinner she won’t be needed, it wasn’t her job to serve the food. She’ll have to serve more drinks after they’ve finished eating. Luckily. She wouldn’t have got the mood to watch the picky guest’s disgusted faces in case they didn’t like their supper.

She was slowly becoming a professional with maneuvering the tray of champagne, knowing when she’ll have to get some more. She always adjusted her rounds in the room according to this. She still had time and she really hoped that this time she won’t screw up anything – like last time when a tipsy guest pushed her and half of a dozen glasses landed on the floor and of course their prize was cut off from her salary. The guests are always right. Sure, let’s punish the poor student girl even more, let’s deprive her from 3 days meal, she’s got some backup on her body anyway… 

While Anita made her rounds in the room, some more men in suits walked in. Dave wrinkled his nose. Even though Martin told him not to act like a child and behave, he couldn’t stop himself. His face showed his disgust and it was just getting worse after he glanced around. To tell the truth he wasn’t willing to walk further in at all, but Fletch – in a not too obvious way – started to push him forward and Martin blocked his way from the left.

“Why do I have to do this?” the singer moaned.

“Because Depeche Mode needs good promotion apart from the albums and the concerts” Martin mumbled. He wasn’t entirely happy from this obligation either, but they couldn’t do against it. And they were already here. “You should rather smile, Dave, as Fletch does. Try to put a good face to it.”

Dave tried, but it rather seemed as a snarl so he gave up. “Let’s find some expensive champagne. I’ll be bad and bitchy.”

“As if that didn’t sound like you” Martin murmured, but nodded and spotted the nearest waitress, a girl with braid long hair, and waved to her when their eyes met. Anita’s expression didn’t change as she walked to them, balancing the remained four glasses on her tray. ‘Fantastic, another bloody rich guy who treats me like a dog…’ she thought to herself.

“Very funny, Gore” Dave answered. Meanwhile Anita reached them and he took a glass from the tray “Thanks. What kind is it?” he asked from the girl.

“French champagne…” she said, hesitating for a moment, because she had no idea about its brand, she only managed to remember this. She was never good in this kind of stuff. “It’s bloody expensive” she added quietly and a bit awkwardly.

“Great” Dave said and drank it with one sip “No, no, no, stay. I still need you” he said when he saw that she was about to leave. He took another glass.

She stood there patiently and watched as this strange man drank his second champagne too, which made her tray empty. “Do you want me to bring some more?” she asked, feeling uncomfortable a bit.

“No, I think this’ll be enough for him” Martin put in, sending a little smile for Anita, who nodded and disappeared before she would’ve found herself in the middle of an embarrassing debate.

“Thanks for worrying” Dave mumbled.

“It’s natural. You know that you’re not allowed to drink too much” he shrugged “Let’s go and do those damned circles.”

“I agree. Let’s get over with it.”

Meanwhile Anita’s boss told her to go to the newly arrived guests. The dinner was near and she repeated this to survive the remaining minutes, walking around – sometimes spotting the chatting 3 men here or there.

\---

Finally the moment came when she could put down her tray – which made her hand numb. Now it was time for others to work and she can rest a bit. This night wasn’t too good. She knew people and here no one was honest. She hated being there. After the crowd disappeared she cleared the small tables where the guests had been drinking and chatting until now and then se sat down onto a chair. She bent her forehead into her palm and closed her eyes to switch off her brain for a little while.

In the open door of the main room a blonde guy appeared as he nearly fled the dinner. He wasn’t hungry, he rather wanted to drink something. He was bored to death from these events, but he kept himself together. As he approached the bar where a waiter was ready to take the guests orders, he spotted the relaxing girl sitting by a table, but for now his eyes just passed her. First he needed a drink. As a started he asked for a double whiskey without ice. The next one can have ice. He sat onto one of the bar stools and drank half of the content of his glass with one sip and sighed in relief. He felt himself immediately better and now he took his time with looking around. A posh couple hurried to the dinner, a few waiters adjusted this smaller room and that girl was there too. Now he had a little more time to take a good look at her. 

She lifted her head, cuz she felt as if someone was watching her. And yes, her instincts were right again, that blonde guy was there. A grimace showed up on her face then she switched to a bored expression.

Martin was amused by the obvious fact that she hated being here as well. With one sip he made the rest of his drink disappear and now he asked for the next one with ice before looking at the girl again. She wasn’t that typical model he got used to during the years, but she wasn’t ugly either. If she wore some more make-up on her nice little face, she could have been quite attractive. Though she was still okay, but as he watched her he noted to himself that she was that kind of girl, who doesn’t grab men’s attention right away. Previously he could notice that she was stall and he knew that she had grey eyes. He has been always a good observer. Somehow he liked that sullen expression she had as she was sitting there, fixing her gaze on the table cloth, holding her orange juice with one hand.

Anita started to avoid the blonde man, although she knew that he was way more than unabashed now. But tonight she needed her strength and she didn’t like to get into fights anyway. She stirred her juice with her straw absentmindedly.  
After a few minutes Martin slid off of his stool with the third whiskey in his hand and walked to the lonely girl, who was clearly out of place here, because none of his colleagues spent a minute to look at her. 

She came back to reality when she realized that someone was sitting opposite her. She looked up curiously, because she thought that the dinner was over, but when she noticed that it was just the blonde man, and her ‘What do you want?’ expression showed up on her face. Her hands left her glass behind as she pulled them back to her chest as she straightened her back, getting further from the stranger.

“Do you need something?” she asked, trying to be polite while she forced herself to look normally on him.

“Just your company.”

“Sir, I think I’m not the best for that. I guess you have enough acquaintances here. ‘I mean get lost’ she added in her head. Why? Why did he need to pick her?

“You look so out of place.”

“Because I don’t belong here” she shrugged “I’m just an employee here, who serve drinks.”

“And you wish all of this to go to hell.”

“I can’t answer this” she shrugged again. 

“Are you afraid that your boss’ll hear it or that I tell him?” he sipped again.

“I don’t want to get into trouble – it’s this simple. I need the money.”

“And for what are you saving with this élan?”

“For a Barbie dream chaise” she groaned. It didn’t really mattered anymore.

Martin was about to drink, but when he heard her answer, he snorted and couldn’t stop coughing. 

“I’m sorry!” she jumped up and gave a tissue to him while she carefully patted his back.

He had a wide grin on his face as he looked up “Oh, it’s okay, no problem! I wish I could just burn these things!” he pointed onto his elegant suit “It’s not my world.”

“Really? But you’re a guest here, which means that you’re rich and probably this won’t be your last party from this kind” she shrugged and sat down.

“But I never asked for this. I just wanted to make music. I didn’t know back then that I’ll have to come to such events” he sighed and coughed a bit more “But… you never mentioned your name. What is it?”

“Is this relevant information for the short time of our acquaintance?” she asked back.

“I just want to know whom I’m talking to” he smiled and shrugged kindly. He found the girl more and more sympathetic.

The young woman smiled then – not knowing why – but she said “Anita” and looked into the green eyes.

“Thank you” the white smile got wider “I’m Martin” he held out his hand, but instead of shaking hers he gently kissed the soft hand.

“I think you want something…” she looked at him piercingly but not displeasingly.

“Maybe you’re not wrong” he sipped another one “You don’t like it?”

“Bah… don’t make me laugh!” she rolled her eyes.

“Why do you say this? You’re pretty and I like you. Where’s the problem?” he looked at her in honest surprise.

“Financial differences? I’m not in your world, Martin.”

“In the world of emotions it doesn’t count at all. There it doesn’t matter how thick your wallet is or if the other’s dress is ragged. We’re all damaged people somewhere, blessed with a short life. So why not exploiting the opportunities life gives us before dying thanks to “God’s” sick sense of humor?” he looked into the grey eyes.

“What kind of music do you write?” she asked as she propped her chin in her palm. The man started to seem interesting to her although she knew that he needed her just for some hot sex… But as she gave it another thought… maybe she wouldn’t be protesting too much… It has been so long ago since someone… but she rather concentrated on the answer, for now.

“It’s not easy to categorize it” he shrugged “I’m rather interested in the lyrics, electronic music is just a plus to them with David’s voice. David was the man next to us in black suit, who drank two glasses of champagne” he explained when he saw the confused look on her. This girl really didn’t recognize them, and somehow he was glad about that now. 

She nodded then she noticed some noises sweeping out from the main room “I think that the dinner will be over soon. You should go back.”

Anita saw as Martin looked towards the doors too and she realized that she felt sorry that he’ll go back there and she’ll be just a waitress again. If he made an offer… but she didn’t even know why she was thinking like this. There was no other woman available nearby, that’s all. She fixed her grey eyes on the table not to see the blonde man go back before she has to bow before the guests again.

As if Martin had read her mind… he stood up and offered his hand for her.

“I’m not going back there, but I’d like you to come with me…” he looked at her with an obvious glint in his eyes “Are you coming with me?”

‘You have to be clever now’ she thought. ‘You gave up yourself for a smile and a pair of green eyes! For some beautiful green eyes, if you think deeper into it… Oh damn! You can be a whore just once in a life time!’ She smiled and slid her hand into his.

“Where do you want to take me?” she asked as if she had no clue.

“To the first place where we can be alone” he whispered and quickly led her out from the room. For a moment he looked around then headed for the men’s room.

“Why? What do you want to do with me?” she asked again with a huge smile.

“I think you know!” he grinned back then checked if they were alone in the restroom. There was no one else. In the next moment he was already closing the door of one of the cubicles and gently pressed Anita against the wall, looking into the now deep-grey eyes. There was no turning back. He slowly leant over and pressed his lips against hers. She deepened the kiss immediately, savoring Mart’s mouth greedily, as if her hidden side surfaced. When she actually managed to pull back from him, she looked at him panting “I’m not normal” she moaned.

“I like it!” he said right away and grabbed her hips to pull her against him, letting her feel that he wasn’t lying.

“If they fire me, you have to compensate!” she laughed but it ended in a moan and she felt that her long-suppressed desires got quickly close to the surface. She dragged Mart back to her while her fingers found their way under the suit and took rid off it.

“Of course!” he moaned into her mouth and greedily started unbuttoning her shirt. In a few moments he revealed the full breasts. He growled from the sight and licked along the hem of the white bra immediately.

Anita giggled again then reached for Mart’s tie and it landed on the floor within a minute before his shirt followed it, revealing the skin of his chest. This time he found himself pressed against the wall as Anita tasted his upper body with her tongue and teeth, biting harder and harder.

“Oh yes! That’s it! How did you know that I…” he moaned, trying to hold himself back as he bent his head back then he looked down at the wild waitress.

“I just have to look you in the eye” she answered smiling then bit again, but she realized where they were and sped up so she could kneel down in front of him, worshiping him. She quickly got rid off the disturbing layers, but she couldn’t suppress an ‘Oh my god’ when she faced his size.

Martin laughed quietly “Don’t be afraid, it won’t bite!” he stroked the flushed face.

“I hope so” she looked up at him “You get just some warm-up” she said, knowing that they were in a public place. She wanted to get going.

She bent back to Mart’s groin and ran her tongue on it a few times before taking his hardness into her mouth. Now she blessed the evolution for being able to take his size in. Martin dug his fingers into the braided hair and made her move faster, but then with a sudden tug he pulled Anita up before she could get too lost in the situation. He pressed her against the wall again while tugging up her skirt and pushing down her panties. In the next moment he pressed his hand onto her mouth and rammed into her with one swift move, going as deep as possible.

Her moan sounded muffled, but if Martin hadn’t stopped her with his hand on her mouth, her voice would’ve echoed in there. From his rough move she felt as if he was raping her, but it just turned her on even more. She couldn’t stop herself from moaning while she put her legs around Mart’s waist to force him even closer. Now she didn’t worried about being too heavy.

Martin tried to hold himself back as well while he accelerated his moves and he achieved to do so partly with wildly kissing the offered full lips. His one hand grabbed Anita’s thigh, the other dragged her bra half-way down so he could play with the hardened nipple. She moaned into Mart’s mouth and scratched his nape with her nails. She was getting close and Mart wasn’t far either. Both of his hands grabbed the soft thighs and his hips started to move even wilder as he groaned and panted onto the slightly open lips. She was panting and mumbled some “that’s its”, “don’t stops”, and “fasters”. When Martin did what he was told, her body decided that it cannot take it anymore and she strained against the wall, cumming. Martin gasped for air as the tight and wet hotness around him started pulsating. He couldn’t take this sensual pain either. He felt as his hot load filled her after a rough push.

Anita enjoyed the nice feeling of satiety then she raised her left arm to glimpse at her watch.

“Oh god! The dinner was over 5 minutes ago. I have to run!” she said and let Mart go, picked up her clothes, but before she stepped out from there she exchanged a passionate kiss with the blonde man “I won’t see you ever again, anyway” she whispered into his ear then ran out from the restroom and hoped that no one will notice her absence.

The man left behind first looked at the girl a bit surprised then a wide grin appeared on his face. ‘Who knows?’ he mused as he imagined how he’d pamper the curvaceous beauty under normal circumstances. He shook his head, collected his clothes and adjusted them before deciding to search for his friends. He was sure that they were already swearing and trying to guess where the hell he did go this time. Well… he got what he wanted, he was satisfied. Maybe it wasn’t such a bad idea to come to this awful party.


	2. Chapter 2

2.

When Martin stepped into the smaller room where they’d arrived earlier, Dave was on his side within a moment, coming from nowhere.

“Martin! Where were you? We searched for you everywhere!”

“Don’t tell me Dave that you were so worried because of me that now you have the need to hug me and give two smacking kisses onto my face” the blonde musician laughed.

“Why are you in such a good mood?” Andy asked.

“How much did you drink Martin and where have you been?” Dave cut in too.

“Who are you? My wife?” he grinned widely.

“Martin, do I really smell some woman’s perfume on you?” the singer sniffed into the air.

“Huh, I’m busted!” he rolled his eyes “By the way this is the newest odor of Chanel. Do you like it?” he joked with his friends, but then he couldn’t take their confused expressions anymore: he started laughing.

“So you let us suffer there while you picked up some pretty rich chick and fucked her?” Dave grimaced. Of course it was envy talking from him.

“No! Slander!” he protested.

“Then what?” Andy asked again.

“I had to pee. Are you happy?”

“And there was where the smell stuck to you, huh?” the red-haired man looked at him doubtingly.

“No Andy… he fucked the girl there!” Dave grinned “And? Who was it? Tell me something, cuz I’m so fuckin’ bored!”

“And why do we have to talk about my sexual life?” Mart sighed while his eyes wandered on the crowd so he could see a familiar figure disappear among the guests.

Dave followed Mart’s gaze as he winked at Anita, who blushed and looked down, disappearing again.

“Bite me! The waitress?!” Dave cried out.

“Please scream it louder” the blonde man looked at him.

“So you did her!” the singer laughed “And was it at least good between her fleshy thighs?” he whispered dirtily.

“You pervert animal” he whispered back.

“Look who’s talking!” he patted Mart’s shoulder “It doesn’t matter, I’ll make you spill the details later anyway. Luckily we don’t have to stay for too long.”

“Finally. I’m getting hungry.”

“Well, it’s not my fault that you fuck the employees instead of eating….”

\---

After a few days Anita was sitting in her rented flat and tried to learn for her next exam when her cell started to ring. She knew that it has to be some kind of a job, because she bought her cell phone just for this reason. She picked it up. After a few minutes chatting it turned out that it was really about a new job, but it was too good to be true.

The offered money was amazingly good for her. It covered around 3 months’ expenses of hers. And this is why she started to think hard what to do. The party’d be in Santa Barbara, by a famous guy. They said on the phone that they’d pay for the travel costs too. It was too good to be true. She couldn’t understand why they needed her there, because she wasn’t the best waitress on the planet. And how did they know whom to call from Santa Barbara anyway? Maybe a guy saw her during one of her jobs? She had lots of questions, but as she glimpsed into the metal box where she kept her money, she had to confess to herself that she has to do this job.

“Well, Ash, at least I’ll get some color while running around down there” she stroked her cat, who just jumped onto her lap “I have to take you to Silvy for those few days when I won’t be at home. Because this client wants a 3-days-long party! Nice, huh? A party-marathon. But of course it’s good for me and for my future” she sighed musing, automatically stroking her purring cat as she stared out of the window.

After she decided that she’ll accept the offer – because she had to – she called the agent she’d talked to. This agent thing was so typical to the rich people as well. ‘What harm can it do if I hear his voice on the phone?’ She put these thoughts aside and reached down for her cat, because Ash was meowing and crawling hungrily around her.

After she fed her pet she went into her bedroom to start packing her stuff. At least they’ve called on time! Tomorrow she has to leave. 

She couldn’t catch too much sleep that night - her mind was full with the trip. Then she went to the New Jersey airport and patiently waited for her flight to take off. There was nothing else to do anyway. She wasn’t a fan of airplanes, although she had very few opportunities to fly high – in any means. But her trip went smoothly, without any problems although it was a bit boring. In the sunny Santa Barbara, at the airport’s entrance a driver waited for her with her name on a sign. She sighed then grabbed her suitcase and walked to him. She had at least half an hour from the airport to the house where the party will take place, so she had a little time to look at the nice city through the windows. But when she exited the car, the sight took her breath away. The building built in a Mediterranean style wasn’t ostentatious, but it was clear that the owner had a nice bank account. 

The driver walked to the gates and inserted a code which opened the gates. Anita quickly walked into the garden before the driver parked. She stopped in front of the main door and after a few moments of hesitating she pressed the bell. A dog started to bark on the other side immediately. ‘One good point. At least I’ll have someone to talk to’ she thought.

After waiting a few moments – taking in the garden with her eyes – the door with some nice fretwork had opened and a blonde man watched the black-haired girl examining his garden.

“Do you like what you see? Because I do” he grinned.

“Martin?” she looked at him stunned.

“In the flesh” his grin got wider.

“You… you mean bastard!” she pushed him in the chest “What the hell am I doing here?!” she asked and turning around she wanted to exit the garden.

“Hey! Wait!” he went after her and grabbing her upper-arm he turned her around “Where do you think you’re going?”

“Home!”

“No, Anita! Please, wait! I really need you! You’re a good waitress and I want to help to you. This is why I’ve offered this job. The party wasn’t a lie and I need a familiar face among the waitresses, whom I can trust.”

“I don’t need your money, Martin! It’s unbelievable that you had no gut to call me in person! And I don’t need your pity either!”

“Hey, listen, Anita! I’m not pitying you. Why would you bite the helping hand? I know that you need money, I just want to help a bit. Don’t take it as a donation. Rather like a gift from fate. Why wouldn’t you live with the opportunity if it landed on your lap? Why would you refuse working in an environment where people wouldn’t look down on you?”

“So this is how I should look at it, not as free money? Poor Anita cannot manage to earn money from her own strength?!” she enjoyed watching the stunned Martin staring at the pavement then she went on “But… I need the job. But next time you offer me one, pick up that damned phone and call me in person and be sure that it’ll be job, not a care package. Are we clear?”

“Yes, we are… and I’m sorry. I didn’t want it this way. I thought that maybe you’ll be happy to see me again.

Anita was a bit shocked from this last sentence. ‘He missed me?’  
“Why? Are you happy to see me?” she asked with a little smile.

“You think I’d have made you come here if not?” he looked honestly into her eyes.

“Well… if you really needed just someone to do the job…”

Martin was surprised by his own reaction but he slightly blushed “Well… I like thinking back on the things we did in the restroom as well” he smiled boyishly.

Anita’s smile got wider “Really?”

“Why do you question every one of my sentences?” his grin widened and he gently stroked along her upper-arm.

“Why should I trust people?”

“Because not every one of them wants to fool and use you?” he asked back while he invited her into the house.

“Oh, sure…” she snapped and let him lead her.

Martin showed the house and the garden. They stepped out there through the living room’s doors. The party’d be held there. Finally they ended their little tour in the kitchen, where some other people were already preparing things.

“And this’ll be your kingdom” he noted quietly, leaning to her ear “If you want to take a shower and change after your flight, you can use the guest room I’ve showed you upstairs.”

“Alright, thanks. Do you have some special tasks for me to do or should I just help where I can?”

“Well…” he dragged her out from the kitchen, hiding behind a wall “would you mind if I asked some more from you?” he pulled her closer as he whispered his question onto her lips.

“Now?” she asked back.

“If you want…”

“And the job?”

“Hey, little girl, I’m the boss, remember? You can have extra free time whenever I want it.”

“And when do you want it… boss?” she asked and now her eyes turned darker.

“Now!” he whispered hoarsely and kissed her passionately, pressing the soft body against his.

“H-here?” she asked and she had already difficulties with speaking. She could already feel the bulge pressing against her groan.

“No, you silly!” he laughed then took her hand and hurried up on the stairs into the master bedroom. In the minute the door had closed behind them, he started unbuttoning Anita’s dark-blue shirt, not letting her go even for a moment.

\---

Anita woke up a few hours later alone. She rarely slept during daytime, but it showed that Martin wore out her. She had way more than one orgasm thanks to him and this made her smile. She started to believe that she has something in her which grabbed this guy’s attention. She slowly dressed up and went to the guest room to take a shower and change then went down to help for the others in the kitchen. She liked to cook and it felt good to do something and create tasty food. When she wasn’t needed, she did a quick tour in the house again and this way she found a door which was new for her. She was curious so she carefully opened it. She switched the lights on and she realized that she was in a studio. The mixing table and the microphones were behind a glass, and there was a couch in the room as well. A green guitar was resting on the soft fabric and over it there was an English flag on the wall. The other guitars were lined up next to the wall.

She carefully stepped further in. She had never been in a studio before and she wanted to discover every corner of it. First she walked to the flag and softly touched it. She smiled then her eyes spotted the guitar on the couch. She sat down and took it into her hands. She tried to plunk it – she never in her life had a guitar in her hands. This green one was heavier than the other guitars made from wood and had a more metallic sound. She had no idea how famous songs had born thanks for its strings.

So he really was a musician, he didn’t lie to her. She smiled as her gaze fell onto a bunch of papers on a smaller table. She leant down and started reading the one on the top. It was some lyrics. She bit down on her lip, because she thought it was beautiful. In the foot notes she read that it was for the new album of a band called Depeche Mode and that it’d be the third track. ‘Depeche Mode, Depeche Mode… it sounds familiar’ she mused ‘So this is his band…’

“Hey there” she heard the familiar voice from the door.

“I… I just… well okay, I was curious” she straightened up “Are you mad?”

The blonde man smiled “No, not at all. Although it’s really a sanctuary” he looked around then walked next to her and ran his fingers on the guitar’s neck “I see you’ve found it…”

“It wasn’t difficult. I guess it’s close to you.”

“If you’d know what songs I’ve written with the help of it… But… as I’ve noticed you don’t know” he smiled again.

“I know that you’re in Depeche Mode and I have some blurry memories about the 80s and 90s. I guess I’ve heard some of your songs, but I’m sorry, I never had too much time to listen to music.”

“No problem” he took his guitar “Dave is our singer anyway. I sing just rarely.”

“Yes, you write the lyrics, I remember” she smiled at him “But I think it’d be better for me to go downstairs, checking if everything’s ok.”

“Why wouldn’t it?”

“I don’t know. For example they rob your kitchen or they start to hit each other with the carrots” she shrugged with a serious expression.

Mart tried to hold his laughter back, but he couldn’t.

“I know now why I love you so much!” he laughed.

“Oh come on! How could you love me? You’ve met me just a few days ago” she shrugged.

“How? I love your body, the way you move during sex, the way you cum, I love the color of your eyes, your voice, your hair, your humor, that you’re nice and in a perverted way I love that certain fear from people you have.”

“You’re a strange man, Martin Gore!” this time she laughed “And I hate that side of me, who always doubts things, even when you say nice things” she caressed his face.

“And what do you feel?” he pulled her onto his lap to start gently kissing her neck.

“What do I feel?” she smiled and sighed “A skilled tongue on my sensitive neck. I feel that.”

“And?” he started to use his teeth too.

“Are you curious about my heart or my body, which starts to get turned on?”

“Both!” he whispered into her neck.

“What do you like in me, Martin? I mean, I’m not that model type you’ve got used to…”

“And that’s it. This coughed my attention. And then I started to get to know you. Of course I don’t know you 100%, but the things I know so far… I like those very much and it turns me on as well. You allure me like a moth is dragged towards the flame” he smiled at her.

“This sounds good. I hope I won’t regret this” she smiled then she didn’t let Martin say another word, because she gave him a passionate kiss “I want you again!” she started undoing the worn-out jeans after noticing the familiar bulge.

Martin didn’t protest, he leant back on the couch and let Anita do whatever she wanted. He felt that from every move he got harder and harder and his mind was already full of ideas what he’ll do to her in the soundproofed studio. “Tell me your feelings, your thoughts, about everything, Anita! I want to know everything! I want you to talk even when I fuck you from behind!” he said on a very hoarse tone, looking into her eyes.

Anita shivered and felt her groin throb from his last sentence. She licked her dry lips then her hand slid under the open trousers to free the hard member “You want me to talk even when this notable body part is deep in my mouth?” she pumped it hard.

“No… of course… not!” he moaned “But until that… and after that…” he looked at her with a dark look.

“Alright, Martin…” she took his cock into her hand and after getting rid off his T-shirt, she started giving small kisses onto his chest, sometimes biting painfully into the soft skin “First I didn’t want you to sit with me there, but during the conversation somehow I started to like you” she began and accelerated her hand’s moves “Then I thought it’d be silly to miss the opportunity, because… it was ages ago since someone wanted me” she kissed the skin next to one of the hardened nipples.

Mart gave out a muffled moan “And then…?”

“Then I followed you and I didn’t regret it” she sucked on the nipple for a moment and went lower on his tummy “It was amazing to feel you stretch me!”

Martin moaned again “I loved it that you came with me. First I just patted my own shoulder, but then I realized that you were pulling the strings, that you are stubborn and pushy and I’ve totally lost my mind!” he moaned “I want your tongue!”

“Not yet!” she smiled, squeezing the rock-hard member harder after reaching into her panties to make her hand’s moves easier with her own wetness. Now she could run her fingers on him better “So you like it when I’m stubborn and sullen?” she bit harder into his lower-tummy.

“I do. And now your tongue!”

Anita laughed “No, not yet!” she tortured him and stood up to take off her pants. When she saw that Mart was about to reach out for her, she put her leg onto his chest and pushed him back onto the couch. His dark gaze looked questioning and covetous. Anita quickly got rid off her shirt as well and now she was standing in front of him just wearing her underwear. She got onto her knees and she stroked along his open thighs, moving closer to him between his legs. She looked into the green eyes and licked her mouth kinkily, while her hand grabbed the rock-hard cock and started to pamper it painfully slowly.

Martin moaned again, his hips were already moving with Anita’s hand. He went nearly mad from not feeling her hot mouth around him. 

“You want it?” she touched the sensitive tip with her lower lip.

“Yes!” he moaned on a deep tone, looking at the ceiling.

“Are you sure?” she quickly ran her tongue on his length.

“Fuck it, Anita, I’m fuckin’ sure!” he moaned and his fingers disappeared in the black hair, pulling it painfully.

She gave him an evil smile then took mercy on him – she let her tongue ran around him before slowly taking him deeper and deeper into her mouth. Her other hand found its way into his trousers to stroke his balls too.

“Oh god! That’s it! Give me more!”

Anita glimpsed up at him with contented glistening eyes then she closed them again to accelerate the pace of her mouth and hands, which were moving together. She loved Martin’s salty taste. She moved her tongue passionately on him then she slid the throbbing cock into her mouth until its tip reached her throat. She fought off the need to heave while she realized that she wasn’t able to make him fully disappear in her mouth.

Mart’s hand helped Anita to move on him while he was constantly moaning or said unarticulated words. His hips’ moves heightened his senses, turning him on more and more, feeling that he was getting closer. Anita felt it too, so she pushed his hands away and slowly licked along the wet cock “No, no, no, it’s out of question to leave me hanging here like this! You have to pay back my kindness!” she sat back onto her heels.

“Which one do you want: my tongue or cock?” he asked with a grin.

“First your tongue! Then I want you to fuck me from behind so hard that I’ll have to scream from pain and pleasure in the same time!” she said firmly while the tip of her fingers stroked along the hem of her bra, her eyes fixing her victim with an innocent look.

Mart’s smile darkened and after a few moments he was already on top of her, pinning her down onto the floor. He literally ripped off her bra and started biting her full breasts while his right hand’s fingers climbed up on one of her inner thighs.

She gave out a deep sigh and moaned from the pampering on her breasts “That’s in Marty, don’t hold yourself back!” she scratched his nape.

“Come on, talk to me!” he growled and returned to his work. Soon it was nearly unbearably to her.

She panted and tried to collect some strength to talk. She licked her lips, closed her eyes and in between her moans she tried to talk “I couldn’t… process… the things that’d happened… in that restroom… for days…”

“Meaning?” he bit her lower, while two of his fingers disappeared in her. Her back tensed and she opened her legs wider, biting her own lip to suppress a luscious moan.

“Somewhere… oh my god!... somewhere I scolded myself… for acting… like a cheap whore… but… then…”

“Then?” he bit the soft flesh next to her bellybutton and he moved his fingers faster.

“Then… then…” she got stuck, grabbing her own tit “Then I realized that… I loved the feeling… knowing that I was a cheap whore!”

“You’re a cheap and wet slut, Anita!”

“Oh yes” she sighed “How badly?”

“You’re soaking wet! Do you hear?” he accelerated the work of his fingers, which made the unmistakable sounds more audible.

Anita had to give out an unarticulated groan, her head falling back, and she pulled Martin’s hair stronger “Then lick me!” she cried out.

“Like your cat” he answered and pulled out his fingers to lay between the soft thighs, using his tongue and pulling her apart with his fingers.

“Jeez!” she cried out again, one hand wildly scratching Martin wherever she could reach him, with her other hand she tried to find something to hold on to over her head. It was one leg of the table. Her hips started to move with Martin unwillingly “That’s it! Don’t stop!”

Mart didn’t stop, he rather accelerated his tongue’s movements just to savor her taste slower afterwards.

“Do you like the taste of what you’re licking?” she glimpsed down at him and she felt herself getting even wetter from the sight.

“Honey… I wouldn’t lick it if not…”

“Uhhh… I love it when you say such things!” she bit her own lip.

“Should I talk or lick?”

“Can you do it in turns, adding your fingers to it too?” she moved her hips.

“Yeah, I can” he answered and he pushed his fingers into her again “What do you want to hear?”

“I don’t care, just talk!” she moaned “Dirty things or… whatever you want!”

“Dirty things? Dou you want me to tell you what a big whore you are, opening up yourself for me on the floor of my studio, waiting for my dick?”

“Yes! Yes! I am! Tell me more!” she moaned, her head hitting the floor, but she didn’t really care just opened her legs even wider.

“Anita, I’ve never met a bigger and better whore. I love the feeling as my whole cock slides into you, because you’re channel is long enough to do so… if your mouth cannot do that” he laughed quietly to himself.

This made her giggle too then she stroked his face “Then maybe we should prove this, shouldn’t we? Spear me, Martin, onto your cock and go on!”

“You like dirty talk?”

“I love it!” she growled and pulled him up for a bruising kiss.

Martin didn’t protest, she bit her lips while he kinda impaled her without any warning – just in the way he was asked for “Well? Does it feel good? You like it, you sex-addict whore?” he pushed firmly again and again.

“No, Marty, I think I don’t feel a thing…” she joked “Maybe if you’d try it from behind…” she dug her nails into his shoulders.

Instead of an answer Mart slid out of her and turned her around. She had no time to realize what was going on, he was already in her again “And now?”

Now she couldn’t stop herself from crying out loud, thanks to the rock-hard cock straining her from inside “More! I want more!” she moaned, reaching behind her with one hand to scratch Martin’s butt and thigh wherever she could.

“You’ll get it! You want this? And this?!” he asked while pushing more and more forcefully.

“OH MY GOD!!! Yes! YES!” she screamed in ecstasy while her hand searched for Martin’s. She led it along her body, making him grab her moving breast.

Mart fulfilled her wish while he fucked her rougher and rougher. But after a while his hand wandered from her tit between her legs.

“That’s it! That’s it Mart! THAT’S IT!!!” she screamed from the intense stimuli. She felt her own wetness slowly running down on her thighs. Her breasts were moving to his rhythm as his thick cock was moving in and out of her body unstoppable. Her other hand was rubbing her clit in a crazy pace. She let her hair fall back onto her back as she screamed out loud from her orgasm. It burned every cell of hers, nearly making her pass out. But her climax didn’t move martin, he moved in her without stopping.


	3. Chapter 3

3.

She whined and screamed in turns, still kneeling in front of Martin. She knew that she wouldn’t be able to wear skirt, no matter how hot the weather will be, because her knees will be bruised, but she didn’t care. The circumstances made it worth! She could already feel her second orgasm building up in her pulsating and rolling body. She let out a surprised unarticulated moan realizing this then she let Martin take her higher and higher. This time he came with her – his climax was long, he held on to her painfully hard and cried out loud.

Anita’s face twitched and she smiled from the feeling as Martin’s hot load filled her and from the way it ran down on her thigh. Martin felt contended from this then he pulled out of her and lay down next to her on the floor, his chest rising and falling quickly. She could only lie onto her tummy. She was gasping for air wildly as well as she turned her head towards him.

“Well?” he turned his head to look her in the eye, his fingers gently stroking her spine “Did you enjoy it?”

“There’s no word to describe how much…” she said hoarsely and sighed “You’re a god, Martin…”

“And you didn’t even made love to me” he laughed.

“You think it was just good sex, right?” she smiled at him, exhausted.

“I think it was dirty and amazing sex and I like being with you and I really like you, but not just because of this. But to make love to someone you need more.”

“Yes, I know” she sighed and closed her eyes for a moment then she let herself get lost in the contentedly shining green eyes.

“What?” Mart asked, watching the grey irises.

“Nothing” she shrugged.

“C’me on…” he whispered, caressing the flushed face.

“Nothing, it’s just that… I think I won’t have anything like that with you” she smiled at him a bit sadly “But it’s okay this way!” she raised one hand to stop him before he could say anything.

“But… what if… I want it?”

“Why would you do that?” she sat up, pulling her legs to her chest as she turned towards the window, showing her back to him.

“Why wouldn’t I want it?” he sat up too “Or don’t you want it?”

“I just simply think that it wouldn’t work, that I wouldn’t be able to do this” she shrugged and folded her arms on the top of her knees.  
“And why is that?”

“Martin, we live in different worlds and there’s an enormous abyss between us. I cannot even see the other side” she bent her head for a moment then stared out at the trees in the garden.

“Where do you stand?”

“At the brink of the cliff, like always” she scratched a little bruise on her forearm.

“And isn’t it possible for you to come to my side, you little mountaineer?” he embraced her and smiled into her neck.

Anita looked up at him from behind her arms. For a long minute she just watched him seriously. Is this really happening to her? Should she put her closed nature and caution aside and jump into this? This was the thing she has been waiting for in her entire life? This is the big jump?

“If you have ropes which can bear my weight…” she smiled at him faintly.

“Honey, you’re perfect!” he laughed and embraced her again just to pull her over him.

She just looked down at him with a soft smile and ran her fingers in the curls.

“Yeah, of course…” she rolled her eyes “But now I should really go down and check on things in the kitchen” she stroked his face with her thumb.

“Do you really have to?” he looked at her with big puppy-like eyes.

“Yes! We cannot be this lazy the whole day!”

“Yes, yes, yes we can…”

“Martiiin!” she put him in his place and stood up, but she immediately felt Mart’s arms around her waist as he pressed his face into her tummy.

“What’re you doing? Let me go!”

“Nooooooooooo!”

“I hope you know that now you’re acting like a pouting little boy, who couldn’t get his chocolate?”

“It’s not true.”

“Then prove it and let me go!” she dug her fingers into the inviting curls again.

“You’re mean, you know that, don’t you?” he grimaced.

“Yes, I know. And you like it” she stuck out the tip of her tongue, smiling “So, come, let’s take a shower. There you can bother me a bit more, but then we have to go back and work! Deal?” she winked.

“Deal!” he answered and stood up, already feeling the blood rushing down into his groin again.

\---

After a few hours Anita was sitting in the garden, waiting for the first guests to arrive. They’ve managed to solve the problem with the light bulbs in the garden as well, and the food will be fresh and warm by the time the guests arrive. Everything was fine and everyone was friendly with her, she had a few good laughs. And she was surprised by this. It was unusual to her that people treated her like a human being, that Martin was attracted to her and wanted to see her even after a those hours spent with amazing sex. She adjusted her dark-red shirt and watched the other waiters and waitresses - wearing similar uniforms – letting the first guests in. They were greeted by the elegant host of the party right away. Well, he didn’t force himself into such a suit she’d seen on him the first time they’ve met. Martin was way cooler than that. But she couldn’t deny that it was nice to look at him.

He was wearing black jeans, which’s fabric made a sharp but alluring contrast with the black silk shirt on his upper body. His blonde curls and white smile just added to this, not to mention his glistening green eyes. Anita smiled as it came into her mind that this sexy angel can be hers for a while. She just wanted to strip him from his clothes piece by piece, but she had to concentrate on her work now. She was still smiling as she offered the drinks and this time it wasn’t a forced smile.

Another man dressed in black appeared among the guests soon. He was moving with his lithe steps as if appearing from the shadows, watching the other guests. Anita approached the standing Dave.

“Mr. Gahan, can I give you something? Champagne perhaps?” she stepped to him.

“Yes, thank you” he took a glass from her “You… seem familiar to me.”

“Yes, we met in New Jersey. I was the one who couldn’t tell you the brand of the champagne” she smiled.

“Yes, I remember!” he smiled “And… what brought you here?”

She felt herself blushing a bit “Well, I do such jobs everywhere and Mr. Gore was quite generous.”

“Yeah… I can imagine that” he smiled knowingly over his glass then took a sip from the expensive champagne.

Anita just blushed even more “I’m sorry, I have to get moving” she nodded towards him a bit then quickly walked away.

Dave watched her for a while then stopped on his friend’s side.

“Martin. Can I be a bit curious?”

“It depends on what’s your curiosity’s subject” he turned towards him and waved to walk into a quieter corner.

“You’ve brought her here to fuck her again?”

“David!” he growled while he watched the drinking and chatting guests and he waved to Kessler too.

“Yes?”

“Do you really have to be this vulgar?”

“Or rather honest?”

Martin sighed and rolled his eyes “You never change, do you?” he sipped from his whiskey.

“Uhm, none of you would love me, if I changed” he laughed “So?”

“Why do you care?” he glimpsed at him.

“She’s not exactly… your type. But of course if you want something from her, and she’s not just a part of your sick games...”

“How do you know who’s good for me? And which kind of games do you have in your mind?” he circled the booze in his glass before drinking it.

“I was lucky enough to see quite some of them. I’m just interested whether you have a new sex partner and end up on the front page with her or not.”

“Why would I land there? When was the last time you’ve seen me in the papers without you and Andy?”

“Uhm….” he tried to remember “What do you know about the chick?”

“That she’s charming and very good in what she’s doing” he winked at Dave with a little smile in the corner of his mouth.

“So you fuck her hard. Poor girl… how will she feel herself when you get bored from her after a few days?” he asked with a smile.

“We have no big expectations, we let things form. But it’s good to be with her” he shrugged.

“Great” Dave smiled again.

Anita stepped to them in that moment, because she saw that Martin’s glass was empty. With a little smile on her lips she offered a whiskey from her tray, saying nothing, and took the empty glass from him. She even dared to glimpse at the singer in black. She could agree with herself that he was hot for the second time as well. Dave sized her up in a way as if she was his next prey. She hated herself for blushing again, so she just went to do her own business and serve a Martini for a woman.

“Don’t you dare!” Mart said to Dave, still following her moves.

“Why not?”

“I’m not willing to hand her over. I’ve worked for her trust.”

“I wonder how much work would be needed to seduce her in front of you…” Dave looked at his friend.

“No way, I won’t bet on this with you or answer your question. You won’t sell me down the river again!”

Dave smiled darkly “I don’t have to use any tricks, Martin. You know me.”

“Sometimes I think I know you too well…” he sighed “You wanted me to say it out loud that she’s my girlfriend right now? Here you are, I’ve said it. And I’d like things to stay this way.”

“And does she know about this?”

“She didn’t protest when I asked her” he shrugged, but avoided his look.

“You asked her?”

“We can say” he shrugged.

“So you didn’t ask.”

“We didn’t clear every detail, but we agreed that we both want things to form in their own way, but I don’t know why I’m explaining myself to you again” he shook his head, sipping again.

“I don’t know either.”

“Okay then we should rather greet Kessler and the others. Are you coming with me or you want to stay here and project your little dark plans in the corner?” he looked at Dave, who laughed.

“I never do such things” he answered and joined Mart.

“Sure” he nodded then tried to get to their friends in the crowd.

\---

Anita was really exhausted by the end of the evening when she stumbled into the guest room and into the shower, leaving her clothes behind. She planned to catch a nice sleep. She let the lukewarm water wash over her body while she started washing her hair. For her taste it was a bit too warm in Santa Barbara, but it was possible to get used to it. So now the cooling shower felt very good. She could concentrate just onto the cascading water reaching her body and washing it clean.

“Hmmm… you’re more desirable when you’re all wet like this…” she suddenly heard and felt two arms sneaking around her waist and a mouth on her neck.

“Martin? What are you doing here?” the young woman turned her head to look into the green eyes, where she spotted some playful sparkling.

“What do you think?” he grinned at her.

“I don’t know, tell me” she smiled.

“I just though it’d be nice to join you” he stepped under the shower fully dressed. Now he was wearing just an old grey T-shirt and some boxers.

“Uhm… in clothes?” Anita asked back.

“It’s not important” he turned her around and embraced her “Would you help me to get rid off them?” he asked after putting a soft kiss onto her mouth.

“Convince me to help you” she whispered.

“I don’t know why I have to fight to gain anything by you…” he sighed then leant back for another kiss while his hands slowly stroked the foam all around her back, sides and thighs.

“Don’t tell me that you don’t like it” she whispered into his mouth.

“Usually I enjoy it” his one hand slid onto her breast.

“Usually?” she asked back, slowly stroking the boxer down from his waist.

“Usually” he grinned and kissed her neck as his right hand slid between her thighs, starting to slowly tease the wet and hot core of her.

A wobbly sigh escaped her lips and the wet piece of cloth landed in the water with a smaller splash. She grabbed Mart’s T-shirt and pulled him to her while her back hit the cold tiles “I want you! Now!” she stated.

“I know” he grinned and dragged his wet T-shirt off, not looking where he threw it “And now I’ll fuck you in the way I did back in New Jersey for the first time” he stated pressing his victim against the wall, lifting her up so she could put her legs around his waist.

He just smiled and stroked himself a few times before he entered Anita with a sudden move “Uhhh God! You’re still so tight!” he moaned into the fragrant neck.

“Stiiiill?” she asked back, losing the rhythm.

“You’re muscles… didn’t loose that much yet…” he moaned by the next push “But… I love it! Your grip is nearly painful” he panted, sliding deeper and deeper.

“And… you… enjoy this?”

“Shouldn’t I?” he bit her earlobe.

“I… didn’t… say anything… like that” she moaned “Come on, Martin! Give me more!” she ordered.

“As you wish, you little dominatrix!” he grinned then kissed her so passionately that her head hit the wet tiles and his hips started to buck wildly.

“Yeees!” she panted then soon her yell filled the bathroom.

After a few minutes Martin bit her shoulder hard from the overwhelming feeling and his shaking body found relief. He was still pressing his sweet burden against the tiles.

“There, there” Anita opened her eyes, which she’d closed in the moment of her great climax “see how heavy I am? You’ll collapse in a minute.”

“You say silly things!” he kissed her “I love it that I can grab you and you’re not a skeleton” he lifted her a bit and playfully grabbed her ass. She closed the tap and he carried her into the bedroom “And now I have a question.”

“Me too: does it feel good to carry me?” she laughed.

“Now that you ask: yes, it does! See?” and he carried her around in the room before putting her down onto the bed.

“You’re a sick man” she stated, emphasizing every word, but her smile didn’t fade “What did you want to ask?”

“Can I sleep here with you” he smiled down at her, not commenting on her previous sentence. ‘If she knew…’ he thought, but he put this now aside “I promise I won’t snort!” he raised his left hand.

“Swear!” she laughed.

“I swear!” he giggled and kissed her neck “So? Do you have any objections? Should I go back to my room?”

“No, no, you stay here!” she said then went silent and got lost in his green eyes. She touched his face and gently stroked it. Martin gave her a gentle smile and kissed into her palm then he bent down and kissed her lips, closing her into his arms.

Anita felt some nice warmth filling her heart: she started to like him. She hoped that she just liked him… Martin embraced her contentedly and exhausted and inhaled her nice smell, caressing the soft curve of her back. In the dark she examined the calmly glistening green eyes. Despite that she barely knew him, it surprised her that he could soften her this easily with one smile or stroke. Usually she was way more “prickly”, but now it felt good just to let herself drift and let her go a bit. She smiled when Martin turned her onto her back and rested his head on her chest. She automatically started stroking his curly hair, watching him for a while then she closed her eyes and soon stepped into the world of dreams.

\---

In the early morning Anita woke up from the feeling that something heavy was on her tummy. As she glimpsed down she realized that it was Martin’s head. He still didn’t let her go! This warmed her heart. It was ages ago since she woke up with someone in one bed that wasn’t her cat. She stretched then gently dug her fingers into the blonde messy hair. Martin soon woke up too from the nice feeling and looked into the grey eyes. The two remaining days has just started.  
After she survived Martin’s attack on an empty stomach, she cleaned herself up and went downstairs to look around and help to her workmates to clean up the mess.

\---

Dave Gahan was sleeping in his own guestroom, full in the nude. He was snoring quietly. The light blanket slid off of him a long while ago so his well-shaped butt and the dark tattoo on his back were staring at the ceiling.

Anita tried to collect the glasses onto her tray as quietly as she could, checking the empty rooms as well. She carefully opened the door to one of the rooms she thought were empty when she froze from the sight and maybe even her jaw dropped. Dave didn’t move. She was about to back out from there with her head bent, but she stopped and couldn’t bear not to take another glimpse at the perfect body. The dark tattoos made such a nice contrast on his skin... For a moment she hesitated then said to herself that she was a big slut as she quietly started walking towards him. ‘If he wakes up then… I’ll say that I came just for the glasses on his table’ she tried to calm herself.

Then she made a few careful steps towards him to admire him in his great nakedness. She felt herself weaken from the sight. She knew that it was time for her to leave, but she couldn’t move. She cursed herself when she got even closer. The soft brown skin was so alluring on his back and she wanted to touch the Celtic tattoo so badly that she was surprised from herself. Well, she had to confess that she always found tattoos attractive. Her fingertips – barely touching his skin – followed a crooked line while she bit her lip from the soft warmth she felt on them. She continued doing this for another minute, fully getting lost in it until from a louder breather she pulled her hand back and she rather started collecting some glasses. She was about to reach for the last one when she glimpsed at Dave again and accidentally pushed the glass onto the carpet. Luckily it didn’t break but landed on it with a quite loud thud.

A louder snort came from the bed and a sleepy deep voice asked on a quite aggressive tone “Who’s here?!”

“Uhm… just Anita, one of the waitresses. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you… I just wanted to collect the glasses” she said quickly and felt that her head was already as read as a lobster.

“Wha-what?” he asked a bit unfocused while he turned around and sat opposite her, sleepily pulling the blanket from the floor onto his lap “Do you really have to do this at dawn?”

“I apologize again, Mr. Gahan” she avoided his figure with her eyes “But it’s already around 10 am.”

“Hmmmm…” he moaned “When did Martin go to sleep? Is he up yet?”

“I guess he went to sleep around half past three” she bent down to pick up the glass and quickly straightened up to glance around the room for more of them “And yes, he’s up.”

“Great” he yawned “Then I resurrect too” he said, tossing the blanket back on the floor and headed for the bathroom.

Anita would’ve put her hand on her heart if the tray wasn’t in the way, but this way she could utter just a “yes”, her face blushing again and she got out of the room with racing heart as soon as she could. She was a bit shocked from the fact that Dave wasn’t disturbed from walking around naked in the presence of women he didn’t know! Then she tried to get rid off the feeling of his skin, his smell and sight and tried to concentrate on her work. 

They had to serve lunch too, although they knew that they’ll have to keep the food warm for the ones who’ll wake up later. She had a lot to do. Meanwhile she got to know that this was some kind of an anniversary party for the band, because they gave a big concert exactly 20 years ago. ‘If I just knew what 101 could mean…’ she mused then waved with her hand and went to the storage room for some more salad.


	4. Chapter 4

4.

In the minute she was ready with the food she had to prepare and took off her apron, Martin easily walked into the kitchen and suddenly she had to smile. She just wanted to run her fingers in the messy hair again. Her eyes followed the light straining of the grey T-shirt he was wearing. Somehow she went crazy from the sight of his arm… and… But she shook her head, because she realized the she’d overfilled a glass with orange juice. She quickly tore off a few paper towels and wiped off the counter.

“Is it for me?” the blonde man rested one palm on the counter.

“Uhm, of course” she offered the glass to him and she got a smile from this.

“Thanks” he smiled and drank half of the content of his glass with one sip.

“You have a deep throat” Anita noted “Listen… I think it’s time to broaden my view and knowledge.”

“Well, well!” Martin’s eyes sparkled dirtily and leant closer “What’s on your mind? Something to do with ropes and whips?” he winked.

Anita grinned “No, not this time. I meant your music. I’d be curious to know how you manage to mesmerize your fans” she shrugged “I have a little free time now… maybe we could have some fun in your studio again, hmm?” she smiled at him kinkily.

“You’re a pervert minx, do you know?” he gave her a smile again and she thought she’ll melt into her shoes from it.

“Ohhh, yes, and you like it…” she stroked along the venous hand “So? Would you share the secret of Depeche Mode with me?”

“Yeah, I will. Very deeply” he flashed a dark smile and led her to the studio.

Anita giggled and followed him until they closed the door behind them “So, let’s go! Show me what you got!” she winked.

“Well, we would need Dave and the others to give you the full Depeche feeling – although maybe we could live without Andy’s musical skills. So sadly I can perform just my acoustic songs for you. I’ve managed to fight out some space for them on the tours and on the albums, so they let me sing them.”

“As a start they’ll be perfect” she sat down on the couch, pulling her legs under her and resting her right arm on the armrest.

Martin picked up his guitar and sat down onto a chair. “Well, this is the better version of ‘It doesn’t matter’. I like it better this way” he shrugged and started to play. She watched the man completely lost in the music…

As I lay here with you  
The shame lies with us  
We talk of love and trust  
That doesn't matter

Though we may be the last in the world  
We feel like pioneers  
Telling hopes and fears...  
To one another…

She really found the song and its expressing lyrics beautiful. Was he singing it really for her or was he just presenting the song, showing that he can do such things too?

And oh what a feeling   
Inside of me  
It might last for an hour  
Wounds aren't healing   
Inside of me  
Though it feels good now  
I know it's only for now…

If he sang it to her, she would be moved…

The feeling is intense  
You grip me with your eyes  
And then I realise  
It doesn't matter…*  
(* Depeche Mode – It doesn’t matter)

During the last verse Martin looked right into her eyes and she felt that he meant the lines he was singing. It was hard to swallow for her, but she somehow fought it off. She rarely cried, she was usually stronger than that. After Martin had finished the song, he stood up and walked to her to lean down and give a soft kiss onto her mouth.

“It was beautiful, Martin! Thank you…”

“You know, I’m just a sentimental old guy” he smiled.

“I love it that you’re like this” she sad. It just slipped out.

“Really?” he asked back.

“Well… yes” she blushed and turned her look away in her embarrassment.

“That’s good news” he straightened up and put his guitar down so he could embrace her waist.

She soon found herself on his lap. This time they rode out their pleasures slowly and gently and it occurred to her that this was closer to making love. After their sweating bodies cooled down they talked about Depeche Mode and what the band and writing songs means to the blonde man. Anita had decided that if she had some time, she’ll do some research to get into the picture better. Finally both of them went to do their own business – work awaited Anita and Martin had to deal with his guests, who seemed to have survived the previous night.

\---

Dave walked around the house too – he knew it by his heart. He had attended several parties here and during recording the actual albums they always spent a few hours or days here anyway. Finally he realized that he wasn’t looking for anyone, he was just heading for the balcony to drink in Santa Barbara in the sunset and the sea with his green eyes. It wasn’t a coincidence that Martin had bought this house. He thought his friend was crazy to give out this amount of money for this house, but later he’d understood it and told him that he’d have done it too.

“Uhm… excuse me, Mr. Gahan. Can I bring you something?” he suddenly heard from his left.

Dave turned and saw Martin’s chick there “Yes, I’d like an ice tea, if the little black-winged angel has some.”

Anita didn’t comment on it, but faintly smiled from the fondling he used. She was still a bit at a loss from the things that happened that morning, but she quickly concentrated on her job and after a few minutes she was back, handing over the cool drink to Dave. “Something else maybe?”

“You” Dave answered after a long sip.

Anita thought she’d heard something wrong. She pressed her lips together and her eyes popped out as she pressed the empty tray against her body “Excuse me, I think I’ve heard something wrong.”

“No, you haven’t.”

“What are you talking about?” she looked at him confused.

He smiled “Just about your company. Chatting and stuff.”

“Oh, that’s okay. What do you want to talk about?” she asked a bit more relaxed and leant against the banister, embracing the tray with both hands.

“I don’t know, about anything that comes into my mind apart from chocolate and sex.”

“Why can’t we talk about choc?” she smiled.

“And why can’t we talk about sex?” he asked back.

“You’ve said that we shouldn’t talk about these two things. I never mentioned it.”

“Well, dunno. Most people don’t think that choc is a topic you can talk about and discussing sex is out of question for even more.”

“That’s true…” she mused, watching the sunset “But I don’t think that they’ll achieve anything with this attitude.”

“Meaning?”

“I mean I don’t understand why it is better not talking about sex. But I could pick the choc-topic as well, because you can talk about that too. The brand, how, how much and when someone likes it” she licked the edge of her lips with a little smile, still watching the beach where a few guests took a walk.

“Exactly. And what do you think?”

“In which topic?” she winked at him, turning her pretty face towards him.

“Let’s take both in turn. You can pick the more sympathetic first” he smiled.

Anita couldn’t stop herself and laughed then she quickly put her fingers onto her lips “Sorry…” she gained back her distant attitude “Well, I like eating milk chocolate lying on the bed or sitting, with a bar and in any time of the day” she smiled.

“And sex?”

She felt herself blushing a bit as she turned back towards the beach for a moment then after a moment of hesitation she looked into Dave’s green eyes “The more pose, the better. The intensity of it depends on my mood. I like it often or when I’m in the mood for it. But of course usually I cannot do that without a partner” she shrugged.

“Really?” he raised one eyebrow in disbelief.

“What really?” she smiled again.

“Without a partner? How can you survive?”

“I do well lately, I have nothing to complain about” she shrugged again.

“Tell me more about this” Dave became curious.

“As if you didn’t know” she sighed theatrically then turned towards the sea “But you know, if someone isn’t that famous, successful, rich and doesn’t look so good like for example you all then that someone has to learn to live with the fact that she or he haven’t got a partner for every finger and that she has to be alone a lot.”

“Well… but now there’s someone who accepts you, isn’t there?”

“It seems. Yes, I want to believe that” she started scratching the stone balustrade with her nail.

“To believe?”

Anita sighed “Probably you never had that much refusal and disappointment like a girl like me can have. I fell onto my face enough times not to dare to believe in a relationship in such a short time, even if it’s based on good sex at the beginning.”

“So the sex is good… the good communication works” Dave laughed.

“You think that in case the sex is good for me then I won’t waste my time on conversations?” she looked at him and raised an eyebrow “I’m not that calculating.”

“I didn’t say that, but the two basic things in a relationship aren’t to just stand silently on each other’s side and having good sex. You have to have both.”

“Exactly” she smiled again, waving with her hand then she folded her arms in front of her chest again “Sex isn’t the only thing in life, although it’s undoubtedly important.”

“Very important.”

“True” she stopped, looking into the deep-green eyes and let herself get lost in them for a long moment, toying with the question how it can be having sex with Dave Gahan. The picture of him naked flashed in front of her eyes and she had to lick her dry lips. 

“A penny for your thoughts” he said.

“You want me to be honest?” she asked after hesitating for a minute.

“Yes.”

“I was thinking about how it can be being with you in bed” she said before she could stop herself, but somewhere she didn’t regret being straight to him. It was meaningless to hide the truth if they were already in the topic.

“Would you try it?” Dave’s green eyes narrowed.

“I think it wouldn’t be fair to your friend if I answered this question.”

“Oh… if you knew what is really not fair…”

“Would you give me an example?”

“Having sex with you.”

“Yes, that wouldn’t be. And I wouldn’t understand why you wanted me in the first place.”

“Then answer me this: why does Martin want you?”

“Maybe you should ask him about this” she smiled again.

“But you should know it” he answered.

“True. But I don’t know about a lot of things about you and about the things going on with you two.”

“With us two?”

“Yes, with you two. I have no idea how it can be living in the world of stars, I’m just a waitress, trying to earn money for food and stuff.”

“If things go fine, Martin will lead you into this world. Or me.”

“Why would you do that?”

Dave didn’t answer just smiled.

“Mr. Gahan, I’d like you to answer my question” she frowned.

“But I don’t want to answer it.”

“Why not?”

“I don’t have to.”

“That’s true” she turned away “Maybe it’d be better for me to go and take care of the other guests as well.”

“If you like. The door of my room is always open, if you want to talk.”

“Great, I’ll try to remember that” she looked back over her shoulder with a little smile then she went back into the house.

Dave was lost in thoughts as he watched the sun getting closer to the horizon. He knew that Anita wanted him. He could feel it. He could always feel it on women. He knew when and how they were looking at him. He smiled.

The second day went along well, there was no problem – if we don’t count those few guests who drank more that they should have, but they’ve solved that too. Anita grew very tired from running around all day, so at night he just fell into her bed and didn’t even hear Martin coming in and crawling next to her.

\---

The last day has arrived with a grill party on the beach, which meant running between the house and the shore. Meanwhile the stuffy weather has arrived too so most of the guests were wearing swimsuits and the waiters and waitresses were wearing shorts and skirts while serving whatever it was needed. The atmosphere of the party – despite that it was the third day – was nice.

Once when Anita went back into the house for some soda, she bit her own lip and couldn’t stop herself not to think of the conversation she had with Dave. Were the hunches about his intentions really true? If they were, he just wants to lay her down, because she’s Mart’s girlfriend. Maybe there’s some friendly rivalry going on in the background? She couldn’t know it for sure, but she couldn’t deny that she was attracted to the dark-haired man as well. A few minutes ago she could see him down on the beach half naked and she had to confess to herself that those tattoos still looked damned good on him. She couldn’t stop herself, she had to go back to his room again – calming herself with the thought that she was just looking for used glasses and plates again. As she stepped into the room, that nice smell reached her nose she had felt time after time during the conversation when the wind blew from behind him. She bit her lip and looked around. Luckily she had an alibi: there were a few glasses around. But instead of heading for them she stepped to the bed and carefully took the black T-shirt between her fingers. She inhaled the nice smell deeply then – still holding the piece of cloth – she walked to the nightstand and ran her fingers on his elegant watch, a black-stoned ring and a silver cigarette-case. 

She went on with her little tour and smiled when she found a lot of chocolate on one of the tables. They were all dark chocolate with high chocolate content. Their conversation came into her mind from this and she realized that he must be surely a choc-addict. She stepped to the wardrobe with the T-shirt in her hand and as she opened it, she faced one of the perfect black and bloody expensive suits, which had fitted his body like a glove on the first night they’ve met. She gently stroked the nice soft fabric too.

“I found you in my room for the second time. Will you cover yourself with collecting the glasses again?” a smiling voice asked.

Anita jumped a bit from it, but then she calmed herself and glimpsed behind her with a little smile, not turning back “No, this time I cover myself with putting away the T-shirt you’ve left there. And of course the first excuse is still in tact, if you look at your table” she waved towards the empty plates.

“And did you want to put away my T-shirt for private uses?” he asked and she could hear from the volume of his voice that Dave got closer behind her.

“No, for order’s sake” she said and put the T-shirt onto an empty hanger before closing the door of the wardrobe “I’m sorry that I barged in into your room” she stroked the handles of the doors.

“No problem” he stepped behind Anita and softly put his hand onto her waist “You can stay.”

“Because your door is always open for some… chatting?” she still watched her hands on the handles.

“Always” he whispered into Anita’s neck.

“I thought so…” she smiled and sighed quietly.

“Tell me” he said while his warm hand started to slowly move downwards.

“To have a conversation, the participants need some space between them, am I wrong?” she asked quietly.

“Did you know that in our fast world people doesn’t touch enough and this is why we have so many depressed and withdrawn people?” he asked while he slowly reached Anita’s butt.

“I could fit in into this category… You wanted to point this out?” she asked, slightly letting her head fall back from the slowly but steadily moving hands’ touches. 

“I just try to take care of your social skills” his fingers reached the hem of her skirt.

“How unselfish… Or is it possible that you expect something in exchange?” she watched him without moving.

“Just the thing you offer” he answered then his fingers slowly disappeared under the hem of her skirt.

“And what do you want me to offer? Tell me!” she bit her lower lip as she leant back and felt her shoulder-blades touching his naked and warm tattooed upper body.

“You” he breathed then he gently bit her neck.

“It sounds… quite simple” she sighed from the nice feeling while she felt the hand on her inner thigh crawling upper and upper.

“I think so too” Dave said and went on.

For a minute she couldn’t even say a word as she felt the soft sucking on her neck – which was one of the most sensitive spots on her body. Dave was lost in the moves he made and felt that Anita was enjoying what he was doing to her too. His long fingers have reached their destination and quickly tried to find their way under her panties.

But before he could slide them under the fabric, he felt Anita’s hand on his “…but… it isn’t as simple as you might think…” she pulled out his hand from under her skirt and turned to Dave. She had to blink a few times before the desire got less obvious in her eyes.

“Really?” he asked with that well-known smile.

“Really” she nuzzled to him and she had to smile from the bulge she felt by her lower-tummy. “Do you know in what case it’d be simple?” she stroked along the naked chest.

“In what case?”

“If I wasn’t with your friend” she ran her index-finger on his full lower-lip and stepped back a bit “Give me a call when I’m not with him anymore” she added.

Dave laughed quietly “Is this a threat?” he caressed her chin with his finger “No, Anita, you just made our little game more exciting with this. I know that you want me. I can feel it. I’m your personal predator and I’ll hunt you down” he let her go.

“Alright, we’ll see if the hunter will be clever enough to get its prey” she smiled and turned around. As she walked away, she took her tray and despite her body protesting badly, she’d left the room, waving back to Dave once more.


	5. Chapter 5

5.

Anita was slightly panting, leaning to the door from the outside. She heard Dave crawling inside and she needed a lot of strength not to go back and jump on him. But she didn’t want to do that, although not moving meant nearly physical pain now. She considered herself lucky to spot Mart passing by downstairs. She didn’t think: she hurried after him.

Martin was crawling in the living room - not knowing what was waiting for him – pressing his cell phone to his ear, while his free hand rested in the pocket of his white linen short. Anita didn’t care to whom or about what he was talking, he caught up with him, grabbed his shoulder and dragged him into a separate corner. He was surprised and ended the call with a “I’ll call you back soon” then he looked at her confused, grabbing her shoulders “Hey, hey, honey! What’s this all about?”

“Isn’t it obvious? I want you! Now!” she stated and went on with kissing him wildly, her fingers working their way downwards.

“Are you crazy? Someone can see us!”

“And?” she looked up at him, her eyes dark with desire “Don’t act like an innocent little girl” she growled.

Martin’s next protest died away before it could leave his lips, which he had to lick with a little grin “Wait! Come with me!” he took her hand and pulled her into the empty amusement room, locking the door behind them “What or who the hell did turn you on this much?” she grinned at her.

“I saw you” she shrugged with a faint smile “Well?”

“So what do you want?” he played with her a bit as he slowly backed with her to the wall.

“Isn’t it obvious, again? You and your little friend” she smiled while her fingers gently stroked along the body part in question “Just do it at last!”

“Not so quickly” he grinned again then backed with her until her butt touched the edge of the billiard table “Did you do it on a billiard table yet?” he asked, still grinning and shot a dirty look at her as he made her sit up onto the tavle, pulling up her skirt and revealing her bourdon panties.

“No, not yet. And not on a piano either” she added “But I’m in if you want to do it in front of a mirror as well.”

“I love your kinky fantasy!” he growled and dragged off the unnecessary fabric from her body. He leant down greedily to taste her already wet core.

Her fingers disappeared in the blonde hair within a few moments, pulling and releasing them again and again, scratching his nape time after time. “Yes! That’s… it! I want you… so badly!” she moaned.

Martin just grinned and glimpsed up at the girl in agony and slowly licked along her throbbing clit “How badly?”

“Very badly! And you fuckin’ love it, right? It fuckin’ flatters your ego, huh?” she licked her lips and smiled.

“Oh, sure” he rubbed her most sensitive spot slowly while answering “Why? Don’t you enjoy the thought that from this I’ll get so turned on that I’ll ram my rock-hard cock into you within seconds, fucking you until you’ll beg for mercy?” he grabbed one of the naked thighs with his free hand. 

“Ohhh I am!” she answered “I can’t wait for you to show me something, not just bark about things.”

“So you don’t want me to use my mouth? You wished for it…” he made her stand up just to gently push her onto her knees by her shoulders. “Would you offer me a helping hand?” he grinned down at her.

“What do you want?” Anita moaned and looked at him.

“I think you know” he loosened his light trousers and fisted a hand in her hair, pulling her head closer to his groin.

“Hmmm…” she pulled off the distracting layers from Mart and gently reached for his cock “How badly do you want it?”

“Just until I get hard enough for you” he stroked along the flushed face and wiped off a sweat drop.

“I’m at your service” she answered and started to play on him with her tongue.

He grabbed her hair with both hands and gently started leading her. He loved the feeling when he could move in her hot wet mouth. And she didn’t let him down. She was working on him greedily, enjoying the feeling that Mart could fill his mouth too and she felt contended from knowing that he got harder and harder with every move.

The musician moaned on a deep voice when he felt that the soft lips had worked on him enough. He gently pulled her up and turned her around to lean on the billiard table, her ass touching his throbbing groin. He put one of her legs up onto the table’s edge and didn’t let too much time for her to hold on to something because he was already buried deep inside of her, starting a wild pace at once. Her loud moan filled the room and she tried to prop her weight on her hands, but the green surface was slippery to her. Martin’s face twitched time after time from the pleasure he felt while he fucked the hot wetness around him quick and hard.

“I love it when… you’re like this!” she panted.

“I’m glad… that… you like it!” he moaned on a throaty tone then took her leg off of the table and pushed her sweaty back downwards, forcing her legs apart even more. He grabbed his hard and wet cock and rammed it inside her nearly all the way long.

“Say… something!” she moaned while she scratched the green fabric under her hands and tried to balance herself.

Martin didn’t care that she was ruining a bloody expensive billiard table, because by now he could just throw his head back and moan and growl, grabbing her ass and waist firmly time after time.

“I’m… getting… close!” he gritted through his teeth and to show her that he was serious, his right hand slid between her thighs and onto her clit, starting to rub it furiously.

She had to scream and scratch the top of the table again “Don’t… hold yourself… back!”

Martin didn’t answer just suddenly pulled out of her and leant down to taste the hot wetness between her thighs then he rammed into her again, circling his hips, before collecting all of his strength for a last dash. Anita didn’t know what was happening anymore, she just wanted to feel Mart and her approaching orgasm. He was moving and moaning like an animal, leaving long scratches and deep bite marks on the body laying in front of him then he pushed himself all the way up into her, flying high and releasing into the soft body. She gave out a long scream, showing to the world that she was in seventh heaven then she collapsed onto the table and fought for air. Martin’s sweaty body was on top of her and he kissed the wet line of her spine. He was still buried inside of her when he asked “Did I manage to please my nymphomaniac kitty?”

“I’m not a nymphomaniac!” the accused one said on a disapproving tone.

“Oh you are…” he laughed into her back then stood up, pulling her with him. He turned and closed her into his arms.

“I’m not…” she murmured into his chest “And if I was… would you mind it?”

“Do I look like someone who would?” he laughed and kissed her hair.

“Hmmmmm, good” she murmured again then raised her hand to look at her watch “I should go back to pack.”

“And I have to call someone back, because you made me hang up the phone…” he looked at her with fake pouting.

“Oh, I’m soooo sorry” she giggled.

“But is it so important to run off already?” he pulled her closer “Now… that you’ve ruined my billiard table?” he glimpsed at it over her head.

“How does the billiard table relate to my flight?”

“You think I’ll send you home because of this?” he ran his finger along her spine.

“Well, dunno. Will you?”

“I have no intentions to do so… That table isn’t that important anyway. However, if it was about my table football… you’d be in a much worse situation, darling…” he joked, stroking the round butt with his fingertips.

“Do you really worry this much about your table football, you football-addict?” she laughed.

“Well it grew to my heart…” he let her go and put her panties into her palm.

“Thanks” she giggled “So, you want to keep me here?”

“Sure! I’d love you not to leave with the other guests…” he stroked her arm “I don’t like the house when it’s that empty.”

“Well, if you really want it, I can stay for a few days, but then I’ll have to go back.”

“Just for a couple of days? Can’t you stay longer? Are you sure?” he embraced her again after he pulled up his trousers.

“I’m sure. You know I have a flat, a cat and a school…”

“Are you still learning?” he looked at her a bit surprised.

“Well… yes. Why?” she looked at her a bit suspiciously.

“College? Just because you look older” he said with a neutral expression.

“Yes.”

“Is it your last year?”

“Well, uhm…” here she could feel that she was in trouble “uhm… no” she said quietly. She thought that Mart knew this! She thought that someone had told him or he just checked!

“How many years do you still have?” he looked at her worried and unconsciously loosened the embrace.

It was the point where Anita wasn’t able to look into the green eyes. She stared at his chest while answering “Three years.”

“Are you a minor?!” he burst out stunned.

“Uhm…” she faltered out while she tried to get dressed.

“So yes?!” he grabbed her shoulders “And why didn’t you tell me this?”

“But I… I thought that… you knew… You should have talked to my employer and… he should have said it.”

“Well, no one in the world had told me this!” he put on his T-shirt a bit nervously “You know that if it gets out, I’ll be in trouble, don’t you?”

“Uhm… yes. Only you and Dave knows it. I don’t think anyone else would get to know it” she looked into Martin’s eyes – already without emotions. She was objective. Her defensive system started to work. She’d developed it during the years. She switched off her emotions and this way she could think with a cool head. Her mind had already told her at the beginning that she’ll get hurt. Like always. But she hadn’t listened. When will she learn this lesson? She closed herself up.

Martin sighed deeply, sitting down onto the edge of the billiard table where they just made passionate love “I’ll talk to Dave to keep it in secret. It’s his interest too, because of the band” he looked at her seriously. He could tell that she’d closed herself up. He’d worked so hard on her not to see her like this… He got a bit sad as he watched the sullen expression, her lips pressed together and the closed attitude. He could guess that she thought that he’d just used her and in the minute her real age had turned out he’ll kick her out, wiping his leg in her, like many others had done before – according to her previous comments.

“Hey… come here” he reached out one hand after a few minutes of silence.

“Why?” she looked surprised. This wasn’t the attitude she had expected.

“Just come here… please” his tone softened.

She hesitated for a few moments then walked to him. Martin was sitting on the table and he pulled her closer, letting her stand between his legs and he just simply embraced her, burying his head into the silky black hair. She was confused for a few moments then her body gave in, although she didn’t understand his behavior. Surely it felt good that he didn’t kick into her a few times, but from his words she figured out that their little adventure had come to an end now.

“Listen to me” he pulled back a bit to take Anita’s face between his hands and look seriously into her eyes “this way our situation isn’t easy, but I’d like to know what you think about it. Should I give you a kiss, pay you and say good bye to each other?”

“Why wouldn’t you do it this way?” she asked her logical question.

“Because I like you and I’m bored with not taking too many risks since I’ve left my twenties behind?”

“So you’d use me as an adrenalin-boost?!”

“Don’t turn around my words, please” he stroked the soft skin of her face “It’s not like that. Probably you don’t understand what it means to me. That this relationship we have how important is for me on different levels. I often act strange in other people’s eyes too. They always thought about me as an oddball who can only drink and write. Sure, I am an oddball, because I profited from it for decades, writing out the fragments of my emotions and Dave channels most of them in his professional way. But no one really knows what’s inside of me, how many rage and fear I have from and towards people. You have no idea, because you don’t know me. You don’t know what a fucking hermit I’ve felt myself during long-long years, being with some cheap chicks since my divorce. But those weren’t real relationships. They usually just wanted my money or fame or both. But you’re different. I can see that something familiar in you, which grabs me, which excites me, which I want to know, which I want to reveal. Somewhere you’re like me. Bruised, withdrawn, but you’re still alive under the surface. You wanted to know why I’m attracted to you? Well because of this light, which still radiates from you even if you close yourself up. I see the world from a different angle – like some other people – and say this without being egoistic. I had time to think during the years. And I didn’t like a lot of things I’ve understood – I was terrified by them. Why do you think I’d drank that much? But luckily you don’t know the hell I’ve got through. But now you’re here, showing this light, which can lead me in this half-light. The only question here is whether we can win against society’s barrier… whether you want us to continue it or not.”

Anita just stood there silently and didn’t dare to speak until she gained back control over her emotions. Martin said beautiful things to her and his words seemed honest. She trusted her intuitions and believed him.

“You have no idea how much I want to continue this” she smiled.

He just returned the gesture and watched her for a long minute then he slid his hand onto her nape and pulled her gently closer to kiss her tenderly. She didn’t protest – on the contrary: she savored his lips greedily, as if she never wanted to let him go. He smiled into the long kiss, holding her tight then he pulled back a little to look into her eyes, caressing her face and hair.

“What?” she asked.

“Nothing, I’m just watching you… I like looking at you. You’re beautiful” he whispered and caressed her face with the back of his hand.

“Well, this is the sentence which I can’t really believe” she giggled.

“You think that I wasn’t serious?” he asked. He wasn’t smiling.

“Why are you looking at me like this?” she asked back, maybe a bit afraid of saying something wrong.

“I’d like you to accept that you are beautiful. For me every part of your body is perfect. Understood?” he went on seriously, propping his forehead on hers and closed his eyes.

“I could listen to this until the end of my life” she whispered back then she started kissing him – maybe it was the first time she gave him a real kiss.

Martin felt that she had opened herself up again. Maybe even more than before. Her kiss was different – she tasted sweeter than ever. He let their newly discovered feelings soar.

After a few hours later Anita was sitting in her room. She didn’t want to be there when the guests said goodbye – there was no need for them to know that she stays. She was thinking on Mart’s words and she confessed that they felt very good.

\---

Meanwhile Dave and Mart said goodbye to the guests. The singer planned to stay a bit longer. Finally Mart shook hands with the last guest too, exchanging a few words, then he exhaustedly closed the door. The other waiters had packed most of the things so nearly everything went back to normal in the house.

“It was a nice 3 days” Dave stretched on the couch.

“Yeah” his friend sat down into one of the white armchairs with a beer in his hand “I guess you had a good time then.”

“Yepp. And you?” he grinned at his friend.

“Oh… maybe you know that I had” he winked and took a sip.

“Tell me about your experiences.”

“Why would I?”

“Why wouldn’t you?” he smiled.

“Maybe because there’s something called ‘private life’?” he lit a cigarette.

“In front of me? Oh come on, Martin…”

“What do you want to know?” he smiled.

“Everything” he said greedily.

“Would you be more specific?” he dragged the smoke in.

“Well… everything from the beginning to the end.”

“Hm, you know on the first day the guests have slowly arrived then we had dinner… then the drinking part had begun or I should rather say that it went on…” he grinned.

“You know that this isn’t the thing I’m interested in” Dave moaned towards the ceiling “Don’t torture me!”

“Oh, you mean Anita?” he looked at him with fake surprise.

“Oh, nooo…. So you got closer? Is she a good chick? What does she do for a living? Where’s she now?”

“Whoa, someone’s curious here! Don’t tell me that you like her to…” 

“Oh come on, I wouldn’t hit on your chick, you know that…”

“Sure and I’m the Albanian prince…” he laughed.

“My prince…” Dave giggled with him too.

“To answer your question” he went on after they’ve calmed down a bit “yes, we got quite close. There’s much more in her than it meets the eye. She’s cold from the outside, but she’s alive inside” he mused, puffing smoke towards the ceiling.

“And my other two questions?”

“She’s resting in her room” he leant forward to stub out his cigarette.

“And the other one?”

It was palpable that Martin got more serious “Well, she’s still at college.”

“Last year?”

“I thought so too, but no. David, I’d like this to stay between us, but she’s barely over twenty.”

“What?” Dave froze.

“You’ve heard me right” he leant back and took a long sip.

“Why do you always have to push your limits, Mart? And why do you have to risk your future?”

“We should always show something new, shouldn’t we?” he shrugged and waved with his hand.

“Martin, I hope you know that you endanger not just yourself but the band too with this?!”

“I’m clear with that. I’ve explained to her why I won’t send her home now – for you… I just say that I do have my reasons, which probably neither you nor anyone else wouldn’t understand – except her. This is why I’d like this to stay between us and I’d like you not to tell it to no one.”

“I won’t say a word.”

“Thank you. This is important for me. I know that it’s not an easy situation, but I’d like to believe that we’ll be able to handle it.”

“I’m sure you will” Dave smiled.

“Don’t think that I’m thinking just with my dick now” he rolled his eyes.

“Reeeeeallly? Oh, Martin! I’ll lose my faith in you!”

“Okay, sure, that’s a part of it too, but I’d like to believe that it’s not just about that.”

“So you hope and she hopes. Who knows here anything?”

“Dave, you don’t have to see right away and how things’ll turn out. Where’s the spontaneity then if you see things like this?”

“I like to plan. I like if I control things and not in reverse. This is one difference between us. This is why we write different lyrics, this is why our music is different, this is why we are completely different persons and why we can have nice fights.”

“You have a point here” he agreed, grinning “Do you want to fight over Anita too?”

“You have to ask?” he asked and he looked serious about this.

Martin’s eyes became serious “You like her?”

“Why do I think that we have some resemblance to the hyenas fighting over the carcass, Martin?” he asked with a smile and darkly shining eyes.

“Dunno. Why?”

“Because we are like that” he shrugged “In this case Anita is the carcass.”

“I’d like you to choose another word for her.”

“Prey.”

“You and your animalistic instincts…” he sighed and smiled as he leant back.

“Would you explain it?”

“You always do this” he shrugged “You talk about getting a woman as if it was a hunt. This time – I guess – Anita is the challenge for you. Tell me, how far are you?”

“Quite far” he nodded.

“Would you explain it?” he mocked him with Dave’s own words.

“You should ask Anita about it.”

“Alright, but I’d like to hear it from you too.”

“Look, she’s a woman. I’ve explained everything with this, haven’t I?”

“And as a woman she cannot resist your charm, huh?”

“Exactly. And I enjoy it.”

“Why wouldn’t you…” he laughed “I’d be curious if there was a woman on the surface of our planet, who could say no to you…”

Dave laughed with his friend. 

“Do you want to take her away from me or are you interested just until you fuck her?” he looked at Dave with a serious expression again.

“Rather the latter one. I don’t want to take her away. I’m not that… interested. But I’m not against the other option.”

“I see” he circled the remains of his beer in the bottle, focusing on the slightly lathery fluid. His mind was working and it was as if a little jealousy had sparkled in him for a short moment.

“What’s on your mind?”

“That maybe I shouldn’t let it happen…”

“Maybe?” he laughed.

“I think it’s her choice. I mean, I cannot stop it if she wants it too. If she stays faithful to me, I’m happy – if not… I will not kick her out because of it, in case it’s you. Because I know you since we were pups” he shrugged “You’re important to me too, even if I rarely show it to you.”

“Really?” he lifted his eyebrows.

“Why? What did you think?” he looked back at him, pulling one of his legs up and rested his hand on it.

“Dunno. You’ve never showed it.”

“You really think so? If that’s true then what do you think why did I let certain things happen?”

Dave’s eyes turned dark “I thought that we wouldn’t talk about it anymore, Martin.”

“I’m sorry. You brought it up.”

“No. It was you.”

“Okay, don’t fight over this now” he shrugged and put his other leg onto the armrest. For a moment there was silence in the room “But you cannot deny that you’ve enjoyed it” he noted quietly.

Dave shot a murderous look at him “How many times did you analyze it?”

Martin’s sly little smile got broader as he looked out into the garden “Do you really want to know the answer to your question?”

“Yes, I do.

“Enough times. And why do I have the feeling that it bothered you more than me?”

“Why aren’t you over it?”

“Why? Are you over it? I don’t think so” he looked at the singer with a knowing smile.

“I try” he growled back.

Martin laughed out wholeheartedly “I hope you know that you’re pouting now like a small boy?! Just the folded arms are missing” he said and now there was nothing hurtful in his eyes.

Dave didn’t answer, but the dark flame didn’t disappear from his eyes.


	6. Chapter 6

6.

“Alright, I stop it. I hope this little intermezzo won’t result in not leaving much for me from Anita” he smiled.

“By the way” Dave went back to the previous topic “if you had the chance, would you do it again?”

“Why do you care?”

“I don’t know” he shrugged “But I’d like to know.”

“Yes, I think” Mart nodded.

Dave noted and stored this information. And the blonde man was willing to share Anita too. That’s good news. He had to smile from this. He already enjoyed the moment when he’ll be able to taste the girl a bit too – after all, they’ve agreed with Martin. A shiver ran down his spine from the thought what kind of things Mart is capable of.

They’ve chatted with Martin for a few more hours then he said goodbye and left.

\---

Nearly two months have passed commuting between New Jersey and Santa Barbara. Although being on road was a bit tiring for Anita, she gladly spent as much time with Martin as she was able to free in her schedule. Luckily the finals at the university were closing up, but this meant that before she could spend the summer with Martin, she had to take her exams. She tried to arrange her things in a way that will make her able to go after Martin, who came to New York, because the band was recording their songs here now. They wanted to release the new album next spring. She was happy that Martin was in his creative period with the others. She liked their music – she got to know it meanwhile – and she couldn’t deny that it grew to her heart. She hasn’t seen the blonde man in the last two weeks, because she was learning all the time and they could talk just on the phone. They usually talked at night and it occurred several times that they couldn’t stop themselves from whispering what they’d to with each other – they went on until their shaking body found relief.

Finally her last exam’s day has arrived too. After she was over it, she called Martin to talk about the details of their meeting in a few days time. She needed some time to arrange things around her grades. When she was finally ready, she took Ash, sat into the black Audi waiting on the street for her and after around an hour she exited it in front of the Riverside hotel on Jane Street. Andy, the third member of the band, and Martin had rooms here to be as close to Dave as possible. The singer lived in this street too and they were working in the studio on the 11th floor with their drummer Christian and a few other people.

After 20 minutes of arguing she managed to arrange that they let her cat into the hotel, saying that she was housebroken, she had the necessary vaccinations, that she takes her to the vet regularly and that she isn’t aggressive at all. So finally she managed to go up to her room. After taking care of Ash’s stuff, she bent down to her. She was laying patiently in her case, waiting for Anita to let her out.

“I hope Ash that you appreciate what your mom did to you, letting you in here and that you won’t do anything bad. I beg you not to ruin the furniture!” she said and her cat meowed. Anita smiled and let her out “Take a good look around, we rarely see such a room!” she laughed “Luxurious environment. What do you say? Shall we kick over the traces? Do you want to eat something really yummy instead of cat food tonight?” she asked then stepped to her bag and started unpacking. Ash followed her with her tail up high.

“Hi sweetie, I’m glad you’re finally here!” a familiar figure appeared in the door after a few minutes. 

“Hi” she turned around. The cat was already by Martin, sniffing him.

“Hello there” he slowly bent down to her, avoiding sudden movements “Hello kitty” he stroked her clever head.

“Meow” she answered, rubbing her head to Martin. Anita laughed.

“She likes you. It’s a good sign. It means that you can stay for a long while with me.”

“Oh, it’s good to hear” he lifted up the purring cat while he stepped to Anita and gave her a quick kiss “What’s this beauty’s name?”

“Ash. I’ve got it to my birthday two years ago. I’m not alone in my flat. I love her much more than some of my fellow human beings. How are things in the studio?”

Martin smiled then put the animal down onto the bed so he could sit down and pull Anita onto his lap.

“Quite well. After 3 days work we had finally finished the raw version of a song. We have a two hours long break now then I have to go back. But I’d like you to come with me so I can introduce you.”

“To the others? Why do you want to appear with a whale on your side?” she giggled “If I were you, I wouldn’t embarrass myself with such a thing.”

“You say silly things again!” he gently laid her down on the bed and stroked along her little tummy “I love it that you’re like this. Haven’t I told you enough times?”

“And haven’t I told you that you’re sick?”

“A perfect match, isn’t it?” he stroked along her thigh, pushing the brown light summer skirt up “And I don’t care what others say, they can think what they want” he kissed her jaw-line.

“They think too that you’re sick!” she giggled. 

“But I don’t really care. It’s you that is on my mind right now…” he started stroking her through her panties.

“In what meaning?”

“In every meaning possible” he got to her neck with his soft kisses, inhaling the missed nice scent deeply “Or aren’t you interested?” he pulled his hand back.

“Oh, of course I am!” she cried out.

Martin grinned darkly and searched for her lips to give her a greedy kiss and not caring about the rest of their clothes, he entered her with a quick move and rocked their hungry bodies for long minutes with the gentle moves of his hips. She engorged her feelings and although she wanted to pull him back over her, she calmed herself with the thought that they’ll have more time at night, but now the others were waiting for them.

After a quick cleaning-up and a lunch Martin took her hand and they said goodbye to the sleeping Ash. He stepped out with her from the hotel – putting on his shades – and walked along the street, which had trees on both sides and they walked into the building where Dave lived. He even nodded towards the doorman.

“Are you excited?” he asked in the lift, sliding his sunglasses into his shirt’s pocket.

“Well, I’m not too calm.”

“Don’t be afraid, they won’t eat you up” he smiled at her and embraced her waist “And you already know Dave anyway.”

“Well yeah…” she murmured. Her last memory of Dave was that he wanted to fuck her in his room.

Mart led her out of the elevator and searched for his borrowed key, opened the door and let the stiff girl in. Inside every face turned towards them and Anita hated this. She didn’t like to be in the centre of attention. ‘Come on, look at something else!’ she begged inside, but she realized that it won’t happen. They’d have needed at least a catastrophe on the streets for that.

“Guys, I’d like you to meet my girlfriend, Anita” he put his arm around her shoulder, trying to reassure her, and looked at the boys “He’s Christian, our drummer” he pointed at a blonde guy with a nice little tummy, who was sitting by a computer, smiling at her “and Luke, our new programmer” he waved towards an old school guy with glasses, who was still working on a PC, but interrupted what he was doing to look at them with his blue eyes “The others, Andrew and Ferg aren’t here, but with time I guess you’ll meet them too.”

“Hey! And me?!” a disapproving voice sounded, which’s owner could have protested even from not starting the line with him.

“Well, she’d already met you, our dear host” the blonde man grinned and led Anita closer.

“Even so! You leave my virtues unnoticed?”

“You can hear that from more than enough people” Christian laughed and turned back to the monitor, clicking on a sound track.

“Exactly” Mart nodded then turned to Anita “Take a look around. I have to go and tune my guitar, if it’s not a problem.”

“On whose side are you standing?” Dave laughed too, but Christian didn’t answer, just his shaking shoulders showed that he was giggling.

“I don’t think I should touch things around, cuz that’d end up in a disaster” she answered to Mart, but she still couldn’t stop her curiosity and began to discover the flat.

Martin smiled and watched her for a moment then he went into the studio area, threw his keys onto a table, picked up his waiting guitar and sat down to plunk on it and strained a few chords.

\---

The young woman let the guys work, she didn’t want to keep them up – she suspected that the fans were waiting for the new studio album impatiently. To tell the truth she was curious too, although she got to know their works just a few months earlier. She put her hands behind her back and walked around the flat, enjoying the view onto the Hudson River first.

“Do you need a tour?” a deep voice asked from behind Anita.

Because she got totally lost in watching the barges slowly moving on the river, she jumped a bit from the sudden question then turned back to answer “If you have nothing to do, I’d gladly accept it” she sent a small smile for the singer.

“I have nothing to do. Come” he took her hand and pulled her to a wall, which was decorated with several items “Here you can see the success of our band” he pointed at the framed records.

“Wow!” she giggled from the enthusiastic way he showed their relics.

“And a few family pictures. There’s my daughter, Stella Rose” Dave pointed at a little girl’s photo “And my son Jack. And they are Viva, Ava and Calo, Martin’s kids.”

“I see the two families have a good connection” she leant closer to take a look at Martin’s children too.

“Yes, the kids often meet. Although now that Mart’d gone through with the divorce” he said on a bit lower voice “it’s somehow strangely incomplete. I obviously take Jen too, but Mart has just his kids. It’s sad” he looked at the picture of Mart’s three kids and the sadness was really there in his eyes as he got lost in his thoughts.

“It must be hard” she agreed and stroked along the kids’ picture with her gaze “I hope, I won’t have to experience a similar situation in the future.”

“Let’s hope so” Dave agreed too “And are you ready for the more than likely visit of the kids?” he nodded towards the picture of them.

“No, not at all” she turned pale and her stomach flipped from the thought “For now I still have to get used to him. I don’t need more sizing-up looks and frowns right now” she turned away from the pictures and rather looked at a child-drawing – the figures on it were probably Dave, Jen, her son from her previous marriage, Jimmy and Rosie.

“He’s Jimmy” he pointed at him “Jen’s son, but I love him as if he was my own blood. You know, when I’ve got into his mom’s life, he didn’t like me. I understood him. He was scared, the world has changed around him and he didn’t know what will happen. He was unsure. But I now he trusts me and I have the feeling that he accepts me as his step-father as well. And it’s good. You don’t have to be afraid” he looked at Anita “It’ll be probably very hard at the beginning, but after that things will get into their places.”

“I didn’t know that you can be this thoughtful and caring as well” she looked up at him with folded arms and her warm gaze lingered on him for a long minute. Until now she could meet just the egoist ‘big star’.

“I’m full of surprises” he laughed.

“It seems so” she smiled with a playful glint in her eyes “By the way you have a charming little girl” she noted and moved forward to a shelf. Among other things there were harmonicas lined up there and under the shelf a few guitars were standing in a case. Anita gently ran her fingertips on a guitar-neck.

“Thanks. I adore her” he said on the tone of the typical proud dad.

She didn’t answer just smiled and went on with her tour, letting her gaze fell onto a wall covered with modern and abstract paintings “Did you paint these?”

“Well… yes.”

“Wow! You have more sides than I thought” she glimpsed back over her shoulder then stepped closer to a painting which had a cat on it “It nearly looks like my cat” she noted under her nose.

“You have a cat?”

“Yep, I have. She’s called Ash and is sleeping in the hotel room right now” she examined the nice painting.

“Cute.”

“Yes she is. So, what else do you want to show me? What haven’t I seen yet?” she turned to him questioningly.

“We have a nice roof. It’s full of plants.”

“Uh, would you show it to me?” she got excited and grabbed Dave’s hand, but she let it go immediately. She was a bit embarrassed as she put her black hair behind her ear. She thought on Mart, who was sitting in the studio with his headphones on, playing on his guitar. It was good that no-one had seen as she accidentally took Dave’s hand. She didn’t want to get into an awkward situation. 

Dave led her up onto the roof full of smaller trees, bushes, orchids and singing-birds. There was even a little fountain. “Just for us” he showed around.

“Jesus Christ!” her jaw fell “This must have cost a fortune!” she stepped forward and let her eyes wander on the ‘garden’ and it came into her mind that she would never have enough money to let something like this to build as the owner of two stores.

“We need a space to relax. Sometimes we come up here at night. It’s very nice here and then we talk for hours.”

“It sounds great. And I guess you usually do your yoga sessions and exercises here, right?” she asked stepping to a cage where canaries were chirping.

“How updated you are from me.”

“Well, yes. Lately I had time to dig into the past of the band in my free time. Just to be more in the picture” she winked at him.

“And what else did you find?” he whispered.

“Now I know the reason why you’ve brought up the choc and the sex as a topic in Santa Barbara” she stopped by one of the railings, feasting her eyes on the view and let the cool air make her long hair dance. This time it was floating around her face freely.

“And why?” he walked closer.

“Because you’re addicted to both of them” she turned to him, her left forearm resting on the railing.

“It’s easily possible” he trapped her between his two arms, which were resting on the railing too.

“And which one do you like better? Or shouldn’t I ask questions like these because I won’t get an answer?” she looked up on him with darkly shining eyes, letting her gaze stroke along the full lips.

“You can get your answer” he gently touched her skin.

“And what’d it be?” she ran her fingertips on his side, barely touching the white T-shirt.

“Should I say or show it?” he asked with a dark smile.

“It’s a tricky question…” she said and her smile got wider “maybe first you should just say” she ran her fingers along his inner thigh to torture him a bit.

“But I want to show it” he answered and grabbed her hand to press it onto his groin.

Anita smiled and gasped for air from the sudden move while she leant to Dave’s neck and breathed onto the fragrant skin – her fingers slowly stroking the growing bulge - “Your efforts are remarkable, Mr. Gahan…” she gently bit his neck then gave a feather-like kiss on it. Her mouth slid up to his ear “but don’t you think that you’re about to go down on the wrong path?”

“Why would I think so?” he growled.

“Maybe you should rather eat some chocolate…” she answered and stroked her lower-lip along his, while her free hand really slid a bar of chocolate into his back-pocket and she grabbed his taut butt with her other hand. Then she simply bent down to get through under his arm and head for the door.

“And how long do I have to eat just the choc?” he asked.

“I don’t know that” she shrugged with a smile and disappeared from his sight.

Dave was just standing there then he pulled out the choc from his jeans pocket and looked at it. Yes, it was his favorite brand. She was really up-to-date. He smiled as he opened it and bit into it.


	7. Chapter 7

7.

Anita forced a calm expression onto her face as she adjusted her hair and stepped into the studio. Martin was ready with his recording part. He was standing next to the boys – his guitar in his hand – and slightly bent forward, watching Christian pushing some buttons on the computer. She walked behind him and stroked along Mart’s butt to attract his attention.

Mart looked at her and smiled “Hi. Where have you been?” he embraced her.

“Dave showed me the garden upstairs” she smiled too and stroked his back.

“And did you like it?”

“Yes, it’s a wonderful place. Our host has decided to stay upstairs and eat his choc there. And I think I go and leave you to work. I go back to the hotel to check on Ash then maybe I’ll take her for a walk in the neighborhood. We go to see the nearby peers and stuff.”

“Alright, but take care of her.”

“Don’t worry, we’ve got used to each other” she pressed a kiss onto his lips then said goodbye to the others “Hey, don’t you want to walk me out?”

“Yep, I’m coming” he answered and he was already by her side.

Anita smiled and walked to the elevator with him. She took his face between her hands for a hot kiss “I hope you’ll still have some energy tonight, because I’ll be waiting for you…”

“And what’ll you wear?”

“Just my skin? Sounds good, hm?” she put her arms around his neck.

“Hmmm… good enough” he pulled her close.

“Then don’t make me wait for too long, because I want to make love to you the whole night long” she slightly scratched his nape, pressing her own body against his. Mart just smiled and watched her face. “What?” she asked, digging into his hair.

“I’m just watching you. Is it a problem?” he laughed.

“No, not at all. Although it’d be much better if you did something else too… Uh god, I want you again!” she ran her hands on his back.

“Tell me more about this” he grinned.

“The elevator is nearly there” she protested, shaking her head, but even so she reached under his shirt and gently scratched along his back.

“It’s not that important” she answered and stopped the lift.

“You’re bad, Martin Gore, I hope you know that” her hand slid between his legs “And I love it that you’re like this! I want you to make love to me for long hours, again and again. I want it rough and I want it gently… Oh god, even from thinking of it makes me wet” she bit her lip.

“Show me!” he pulled her to him and his hand was already under the fabric of her panties. She had to bite her lip again not to moan out loud as she felt Martin stroke along the sensitive area. “Yes, you are wet…” Mart noted that she really wanted him and his fingers slid into her. He pressed her against the wall and pampered her with his fingers, giving small bites on her neck.

“Hurry Mart, I want to feel you!” she bent her head back in her agony. It was unbelievable! This man was able to make her hot so badly within two moments that she thought she’d die if she couldn’t feel him inside of her right away.

“In a minute, in a minute… but you have to work for that a bit too.”

She greedily reached for his trousers and was already playing with him. “You tell me right away when you’re ready to impale me, okay? I want it soooo badly!” she panted with a dark look and pumped him harder.

“Alright, just do it!” he moaned, his eyes pressed together.

There was no need for him to ask her again, she did her best with her hand while she was biting Martin’s neck wildly. She felt that her panties was already soaking wet. When Mart thought that he’d explode in a minute, he took her hand, pushed it away, pulled her close, pushed her panties aside and was already inside of her. She screamed from the joy she felt and scratched him hard wherever she could reach him. She let Mart put one of her legs around his waist so he could go deeper into her. He didn’t show mercy – he fucked her hard. Her body hit the cold wall of the elevator again and again as she tried to hold onto something, but her hand always slid on the copper-colored flat surface. She moaned loudly, enjoying Mart’s wild moves. “That’s it! That’s… it! THAT’S IT!” she screamed and her body tensed as she threw her head back and her orgasm washed over her.  
In the moment of his climax he lifted her as much as he could then his body slowly relaxed and he put her down, not breaking his long kiss.

“Maybe… I’ll survive with this… until tonight…” she pulled away, still panting, and adjusted her clothes before pushing the right button on the elevator’s panel.

“Don’t let anyone else get into your panties…” Mart stepped out too after pulling up his fly.

“Who would want to do that?”

“Dunno, anyone.”

“I’m trying my best not to” she kissed him again then followed by Mart’s gaze she walked out of the building.

\---

In the next few days Anita felt herself very good. Sometimes she was following the work in the studio, sometimes she just slept, made love to Martin or sat with Asher on the wonderful roof, surrounded by the plants, listening to the singing-birds’ and the water’s relaxing sounds.

Of course Dave tried to use every possible chance to say something dubious, but she tried to keep the promise she made to Martin – and she had to confess that it was getting harder to keep it. Her desire for the dark-haired singer grew with every passing day. Of course she still wanted Martin the same. And she felt that she started to fall for the blonde musician.  
Sometimes when she was sunbathing on the roof, she imagined that Dave comes up and makes her his, not letting her to protest. But on these occasions she always tried to clear her head and go on with her reading.

\---

Then… then the day has come – the day Anita hated the most. She couldn’t tell why – maybe because of the passing years or because of the bluntness of people. On this day she always bought something for her cat and if Ash was happy, she was too. She did the same today as well. She left the sleeping Mart in the bed and went into the bathroom. She knew that nothing special will happen to her today: she arranged it this way. After dressing up she headed to a big pet store where she bought a feathery wonder for Ash. She knew that the new toy won’t last for too long, but those few hours were worth it.

When she got back, Martin was wearing a robe, crawling in the room with his cell pressed to his ear, listening to someone. While he answered, he embraced her and after a kiss on her forehead she soon hung up with saying “Wonderful!”.

“Good morning, baby. Where have you been?”

“To buy a cat toy” she answered with a smile and showed him the toy with feathers, she even tickled his chin with it.

The way he freely laughed was unusual from him. He let her go and said “Then give it to your little pet and help yourself – I’ve ordered breakfast” he smiled and stepped out from the room for a moment.

“Okay” she answered and turned to Ash “Look, Ash! What I’ve brought for you!”

For a moment Mart watched the enthusiastic cat playing with the toy then sat back onto the bed where the food was waiting for them on a tray “Come here and let’s eat!” he patted the blanket next to him.

“Alright, I’m coming” she said and was already sitting next to Mart “Huh, it looks good.”

“Then eat” he encouraged her and after a few minutes – when Anita said that she was full – he took her hand to stop her from standing up “Wait a minute. I have something for you” he smiled and reached into the pocked of his robe.

“What?” she looked honestly surprised.

“This. Happy birthday!” he smiled at her and put a kiss on her lips as he slid a longish black necklace-case into her hand.

For a whole minute Anita couldn’t say a word. “But… how did you know that it’s my birthday?”

“You know there’s a thing called ID.”

“Oh, you…!” she laughed “But you really shouldn’t have…”

“Yes, I should! Birthdays are to be celebrated. Don’t you want to open it?”

“I want” she giggled and opened the case. There was a white-gold necklace laying there with a crooked pendant. It looked beautiful. “Martin this… this is beautiful” she said and looked at him.

“I’m glad you like it, sweetie” he smiled at her “Wanna try it on?”

“Sure” she said and carefully picked up the necklace and put it into her neck “Well?” she smiled at the blonde man.

“It fits you perfectly” he smiled at her again and bent to her to give her a soft kiss “Happy birthday one more time!”

“Thanks” she smiled back “And now? Do you have any plans?”

“Well, I’ll have to work with the boys for a few hours, but if you want then go and discover New York for yourself. We’ll have dinner at Dave’s tonight, okay?” he stroked along her back.

“What kind of a dinner?”

“Mainly a friendly one – no need to dress up. Just the boys and we. Are you in the mood?”

“Sure!” she sounded elated now too “Until then I’ll kill time somehow. If I wasn’t in the mood to be around people, you’ll find me on the roof with Ash” she sat down onto the bed and next to her cat and started stroking her.

“Great! At least I won’t have to worry from you getting lost in this crazy city” he bent down and gave a long kiss to her. But before they could get completely lost in it, he pulled away.

“Heeeeeeeeeeeeey!” she showed her disapproval and pulled him back to her.

Martin laughed as he gently pushed the willful hands away “I don’t have time now, sweetie! I’m already late, but I’ll make up for you tonight, I promise. Until that I just let you get worked up” he giggled evilly.

“Ooooh, if you don’t have time for it, it’s okay” she let him go.

“Hey, don’t get sore, sweetie” he caressed her face “I promise that I’ll do my very best tonight. Okay?”

“You promise?” she looked at him with big eyes.

“I swear!” he winked at her and he looked like a little bad boy.

“Good!” she laughed “So, go then before they lynch you.”

“Alright, alright” he laughed and stole another kiss before leaving the room.

For a while Anita watched the spot he’d disappeared then she took Asher and soon she was in the roof-garden.

\---

The day seemed endless to Anita – she was even bored a bit as Ash was playing around her for a while then she curled up under Anita’s deckchair and fell asleep. A few times she fell asleep as well. The weather was nice warm. On the roof there was always some wind so she didn’t notice the lately arrived heat. She read her book until twilight then she decided to get back to the hotel and start getting ready for the dinner. During the day Martin came up to her once and told her the exact time of the dinner, so now she had plenty of time to get ready and do something with herself.

First of all she had opened the big wardrobe and was standing in front of it for quite a while, not knowing what to wear. Finally she’d decided next to a comfortable red-black combination. Then she was ready to do the next phases of becoming a prettier woman than she was. As she walked back to the wardrobe, which had a full-length mirror on its door, she could see those parts of her body, which could have used some weight-loss. But she never had the mental strength to go on a diet. She would have liked physical exercises, but now… especially that now she had to crisscross states, there was no one who could have done a normal and proper practice schedule. She tried to eat healthily, but it was still not enough. But at least she stopped gaining pounds. And it was something.

She waved with her hand and left the mirror to put her other dresses away, which haven’t passed her examination. She sat down, put some music on and went on with her reading while waiting for Martin. She was interested in the job the boys were doing in the studio and she had time to surf on their official site too. She found the videos Fletch had made and several pictures of concerts. Sometimes she had to laugh hard from the videos and she smiled on some of the photos as well. She hoped that Fletch had his camera now too. Then she suddenly looked up from her book as something came into her mind. She got lost in her thoughts, staring into nothing, as her idea started to get more detailed. Why should she sit here and die from boredom while the guys were working? Maybe she could get a camera… then she’d be able to use her photo-mania for something… to take pictures of the boys. She had a camera which she kept at home. It was good to take it with her if she went to somewhere or visited her parents. But usually she took pictures of Ash and sometimes she just had to walk around in the city with the camera. She wasn’t a photographer, but she liked this hobby. If the guys won’t mind, maybe she’ll give it a shot. She has to busy herself with something. And she’s here with Depeche Mode. Mart had told stories about their fans and their connection with them. Anita thought that it was a bit impersonal – especially from the blonde man’s side. She thought that the people who made it possible for the guys to be here today deserved a bit more. Of course she didn’t think that she was a hero, but she found taking pictures of them and putting them on the internet enjoyable. And this way everyone would be happy.

She thought it wasn’t a bad idea at all! She started to like it more and more as she played with the thought. And this way she could watch how an album becomes and album, because she’d be there. She’d never seen such a thing and she was interested in it – just like she’d be interested in watching how a movie gets dubbed or how they build a spaceship. These were such topics, which weren’t that popular and people only saw the results of them.

So she gave some more thoughts about her idea. If the time was right – maybe at dinner or after it – then she’ll mention it to Martin. She was curious about his opinion… It was nearly time for her to get ready so she decided to take a shower and dress up before Martin gets back. She even found some time to wash and dry her hair and by the time Martin had arrived she just had to get dressed and do her make-up.

“Whoa, what a nice welcoming picture!” she heard the familiar voice from behind “A beautiful girl in lingerie in my room!” he stepped behind her and kissed her shoulder.

“Hey you, don’t coax me just because it’s my birthday!” she smiled and turned around between his arms, putting hers around his neck and started gently stroking his nape.

“It’s not true! I don’t say it only because of that!”

Anita just shook her head and gave a kiss onto his lips before looking into his eyes again “Are you sure we don’t have some time for…” she stroked along the front of Martin’s trousers.

“I’m sure. Don’t turn me on, or else I’ll rape you on the corridor” he snorted.

“Rape? Oh come on! I don’t think that anything from you would be that” she giggled and took his hand after getting dressed and saying goodbye to Ash. They left the room.

“You think so?” he whispered into her ear from behind, letting his groin press against her butt.

“Until you prove me wrong” she whispered back and stepped into the elevator.

“We’ll see” he grabbed her butt – smiling to himself – and pressed the button.

“When?” she asked with a little dirty smile on her face.

“First let’s get over with this dinner” he laughed “My little nymphomaniac kitty…” he kissed into her neck. 

“Tell me more about it” she rubbed against Martin.

“About what?” he tried to avoid her nuzzling to him.

“About my nymphomania” she pressed herself against him even more.

“Just look at yourself!” he laughed, showing his white teeth.

“What should I see?” Anita glimpsed down at herself, but she just got as far as her breasts, which were pressed against Martin’s chest.

“You’re sticking to me like a nice little leech!” he grinned openly staring at Anita’s wonderful decollate. The nice necklace was glistening between her breasts.

“Leech?”

“A sweet little leech, who sucks my blood” he gave a careful kiss onto her lips not to smear her lipstick.

“Didn’t you have a better synonym?”

“Should I say a polyp then?” he laughed “That can stick too…”

“I’d have liked a continental animal better, not a cephalopod or blood-sucker parasite.”

“Is calling you kitty okay then? Oh I’m sorry, nuzzling kitty?” he closed her into his arms.

“No leopard or panther?”

“You’re so insatiable! No, I like kitties” he shook his head with a smile then looked aside when the elevator’s door had opened “Come” he took her hand “We’ll be late.”

“Coming, coming” she giggled and let Martin lead her through the hotel’s lobby and out onto the street. After a little while they’ve entered the right building.

\---

After getting up to the right floor, Martin knocked and waited for his friend to open it.

“Hi” he greeted the singer with a friendly hug “I hope we aren’t too late.”

“No, come in” he invited them in.

Martin let Anita forward then gently pushed her inside. The flat with mainly white walls was half-lit now by the few candles here and there, making the place mesmerizing. As they were on their way to the kitchen, Anita glimpsed into the living room in the half-light and stopped for a moment to drink in the sight of the nighttime New York and the river through the big glass panels. Then she followed Martin to the lunchroom which joined the kitchen. She could hear the others’ laughter from this distance too as they were waiting for dinner. In the minute they stepped in she spotted Andy, Christian, Jonathan and even Anton.

“Hello everyone!” she greeted them then let Dave and Martin lead her wherever they wanted her to sit.

“Hi Anita! Happy birthday!” they said in union, cutting into each other’s words as they raised their glasses to her.

“Oh” she waved and laughed “You shouldn’t do this, but thank you very much.”

“It’s nothing” Dave smiled and as a good host he stood up “Are you ready for the food?”

“Do you see my body, Dave? You have to feed this amount” she laughed, pointing at her not-so-light weight.

“Oh come on!” he waved with his hand and smiled “You should rather check Chris’ tummy! You have to feed that!” he giggled, joking with his friend.

“This was evil, Dave. I’m offended” the drummer growled but couldn’t stop a smile.

“Oh my god, what’ll happen to us now?” he sniggered then stepped into the kitchen and started serving the food.

“So, honey, how do you like it so far?” Martin whispered into her ear when the others started talking to each other.

“The place is nice. And I liked the guys so far, it’s just that you know” she turned to Mart so their noses nearly touched “I don’t know them too much yet.”

“That’s understandable” he shrugged “You’ll find some time to do that too” he caressed Anita’s hand under the table.

In this moment Dave had returned and served the soup.

“You’re so hard-working tonight, Dave” Andy laughed.

“Hey, dude, I’m the host. Someone has to do this too!” he threw a dish towel into Andy’s face.

“Just be careful you kitchen-fairy, not to throw the food as well!” Anton joined them.

Anita laughed out loud from the “kitchen-fairy” term, imagining Dave – who is quite manly – in a kitchen-fairy costume.

“Alright, you won” he sighed and put the other food onto the table and filled his glass with some red wine “We should start eating.”

“Said the Lord, amen” Chris added and turned his attention on the food.

Martin smiled as he watched the others and they already exchanged pander looks with Dave, while everyone were eating, commenting on this and that. After the second course they were discussing some things around the new album.

To Anita’s surprise Dave stood up for the third time as well and asked nearly directly from her “Can I bring in the dessert too?”

“Oh my god, Dave. You want to kill me.”

“Oh, why would I want to do something like that?” he asked with a charming smile.

Anita took a deep breath unwillingly “Well, soup, main course, dessert…”

“Oh I’m sure you have some space left there for it” he shrugged then went to the kitchen while Martin was just grinning.

“You want to stuff me?” she asked from Mart with a smile.

The blonde man had to laugh out loud from the question.

“What’s so funny?” she looked at him confused.

“Nothing… nothing!” he wiped away some tears “By the way yes” finally he smiled at her.

“And how?”

“With the dessert, of course!” he grinned kinkily, but her other questions were interrupted when Dave appeared by the table balancing a cake in his hands. The light of the candles were dancing in his dark eyes as he placed his sweet burden onto the table right in front of Anita. Of course everyone was singing “Happy birthday to you”.

Anita put her hand onto her mouth and couldn’t decide what she should do: cry or laugh. She did both. At the end of the song the grinning guys raised their glasses to the only female by the table.

“Cheers, Anita!” Andy cried.

“Yes, yes, many happy years in the future!” Christian added too.

“Happy birthday” the always calm Jonathan smiled with Anton.

“Yes, I hope we’ve managed to throw you a nice b-day party” Dave sat down next to her while Martin nodded acutely, telling that he hopes so too.

“It’s divine!” she laughed “What can do this even better?”

“Maybe you should wish something and blow out the candles” Martin helped.

As an answer she bent to Mart’s ear “Can I wish for a wild night with you?”

“You’d get that without this anyway” the blonde man grinned back.

“Good. You should collect your strength.”

“I will, I will” he grinned wildly again “So wish for something, because soon we’ll eat a cake topped with wax.”

“Alright, alright…” she laughed. She stopped for a moment to figure out what to wish for. She let her gaze lazily go around in the room and finally stopped on Dave’s figure. He was in black – like always in case he wanted to show his sexy and elegant side. But when wasn’t he sexy?! He was different from his blonde friend – Mart was adorable with his amazing smile and his green eyes, which promised at least three orgasms, but Dave… Somehow Dave completed Martin and they were each others’ opposites at the same time. Some dark sexual energy was radiating from Dave, which was dangerously attractive to women. She smiled and made a wish then blew out the candles.


	8. Chapter 8

8.

The guys clapped then Christian rushed Anita to cut the cake. She laughed again. As a matter of fact she has been laughing the whole night long – the boys made her very happy even if they just barely knew her. She was just Martin’s “chick”. As if Martin felt what she was thinking about, he leant to her and gave a kiss onto her lips then he lifted the plates for the cake slices. Anita expertly gave one to everyone then finally sat back onto her chair and started eating hers. It was a very good chocolate cake. Dave’s confectioner did his best: he used the more expensive chocolate.

The small gathering stayed silent for a few minutes again. Chris liked that cake so much that he ate another slice as well. Andy got tired soon – this was clearly visible from the flat blinks of his eyes behind his glasses. Anton couldn’t stop talking – he just talked and talked about everything. Anita could join him and she had a great time chatting with him. She found him interesting. She asked tons of questions from him, but it seemed that there was no such question which Anton wouldn’t be able to answer.

Then first Kessler and Andy said goodbye. They tried to drag Anton along, but the Dutch photographer stayed for a few more glasses of wine, having a great conversation with her, while Martin helped Dave to pack.

“Are you sure you want it?” he asked quietly from the singer who was loading the dishwasher.

“What?” Dave asked back absently while he finished packing into the machine and started the program.

“You know it well” Martin stressed his sentence.

“Oh, you meant THAT?”

“Yes” he nodded.

“Why do you want to share her with me?” Dave leant with his butt against the dishwasher.

“Because she’s daydreaming of it” he shrugged.

“How do you know?”

“Oh come on! Don’t tell me you didn’t saw the way she looked at you before blowing out the candles!”

“Sure I did. But are you able to throw her at me to make her happy?”

“First: I don’t throw her, secondly: yes. This is one of the main differences between us, David.”

“And how do you want to do… this?”

“We’ve talked about it, haven’t we? You cannot be this lightheaded!” he grinned at the singer and leaving him behind he returned to his girlfriend and to the unstoppable photographer.

“Okay, the party is over. Anton, go back to your hotel room and sleep!” Martin said with an angelic grin on his face.

“Martin! Don’t talk to me on this tone, because… because… because… I’ll feel offended!” Anton answered and tried to look offended.

“Oh come on, dude” he shrugged and put his arm around Anita’s shoulder, starting to stroke it and sending an obvious glimpse at the photographer over her head, so she couldn’t catch it.

“Okay, I understand” Anton smiled “I have some planning to do anyway.”

“But tell me that it’s not about the new album cover!” Dave asked with a terrified face.

“Why are you saying it like this?” the Dutch man asked stunned.

“Did you analyze your drawings?!” Dave cried out and laughed.

Anton seemed confused and thought that it’d be better for him to go. Martin looked satisfied as he watched him collect his stuff and say goodbye. Before Anton left, he called after him: “Hey, Anton, no hard feelings, right?”

“Of course there aren’t cuz I know that I’ll come up with a great stage set. I already have some ideas. I thought that we could make the stage look mysterious so that Dave’s figure can make a good contrast. And I really liked your black angel style on the PTA tour, although I don’t know whether you want to use that again, but I know that you like feathers, so I thought that…” he got into it again.

“Anton, Anton!” Martin raised a hand to stop him “We’re really tired for this now. We’ll continue on Monday, okay?”

“Alright, alright, sorry” he laughed “I’m getting tired too. Good night! We’ll continue next week.”

“Good night for you too!” Mart sighed in relief then gave a peck onto Anita’s face and finally his eyes stopped on Dave “It’s unbelievable how much he can talk…”

“You don’t have to tell me. I like him, but sometimes… well, it doesn’t matter. We’ll have to deal with such things just on Monday.”

“Yep” Mart nodded.

“Hey boys, I have something to ask” Anita straightened up suddenly “I have been musing on this for a while now… It’d be a nice opportunity or help or whatever…” she began playing nervously with the tablecloth.

“Yes?” Dave looked at her.

“Tell us” Martin encouraged her too.

“So it’s that I’ve seen Andy’s little videos when you were working on Exciter and I thought – if he isn’t doing it again – then… so I’d be happy to bring you closer to your fans with some videos and photos during the process of creating the new album. I’m sure they’d be happy and I’d be able to busy myself with something. So? But of course tell me if you don’t like the idea – I’ll understand that too.”

“I like it. Although I don’t know how ready your little blonde prince is to show some more of his being than before” he turned to Martin with a smile.

“You tell me that I’m withdrawn?” he growled and slid his hand onto Anita’s thigh.

“No. I say that you’re like a hermit. And you’re aggressive too.”

“Aggressive?? Do you hear this, sweetie?” he turned to her, shocked.

“Yes” she laughed “I have to tell that the stuff I’ve read about you usually wasn’t about your kindliness.”

“Very nice…” the blonde man pouted, grabbed the rest of his wine and as revenge he sent it down his throat with one sip.

“Well, you just showed it to us” Dave laughed again.

“What?” he glimpsed up at their host questioningly. Dave was still leaning to the kitchen counter, his arms folded in front of his chest.

“I meant that you drank soooo very angrily. But now I won’t be busy with you” Dave shrugged “We have to concentrate on our birthday girl.”

“What do you mean?” the dark-haired young woman looked at Dave too.

“What did you wish for?” the singer asked back.

Anita’s eyes showed her little confusion, but she sent him a playful little smile “I’d be crazy to tell you!”

“This wasn’t the right answer.”

“Why? What’d be the right answer? If I said that ‘I won’t tell it because then it won’t come true’?” she smiled winder as she leant forward, propped her elbows on the table and let Martin start to lazily stroke her waist.

“The right answer would be if you asked me how I know what you had wished for.”

“Well, well… you know what my wish was?” she ran her finger along the edge of her cake then she playfully licked down the cream.

Dave just nodded.

“And what’d it be?”

“Martin?” he looked questioningly at his blonde friend.

“Well, honey” Martin cleared his throat “I think both of us knows what your wish was” he smiled.

“Would you tell me more about this?” she asked.

“I can sum it up for you in one word” he caressed her face and looked her deep in the eye “Us.”

“So you think you’re not enough for me and I’m drooling and craving for Dave too?”

“I wouldn’t have put it this way” he gently shook his head “It’s alright. It’s natural around us if someone wants this womanizer. But this doesn’t mean that I’d think more into it in your case. I’m glad you stayed faithful to me” he gave her a calming smile “But I see the way you look at him…”

“Stayed?” she asked back.

“Until now” he shrugged “I didn’t mean to offend you with the past time.”

It was visible that she was happy about this news and her expression softened “What’s your plan? You give me to Dave for this night?” she looked at him surprised. She thought that Mart was the type, who protects his “territory” more.

“You both are so rough if it comes to phrase things” he rolled his eyes “It hurts my ears…” he sighed “No, I won’t give you, rather… I let my dear friend have a little taste from the wonders you and me live through together again and again… But of course just in case you want it…” he leant to her neck to gently kiss it “… as a birthday present.”

“And you?” she asked from Mart, but she started to get it. The absurdity of the situation made it hard for her to comprehend it. She’d just ‘processed’ the fact that Martin wanted her – although she still couldn’t always believe it – but this seemed to become another jaw-dropping situation.

“According to my plan, I’ll just watch for a while” he giggled darkly.

“And then?” she gave him a crooked smile. She started to believe this and it started turning her on.

“We don’t have to plan everything” he glimpsed at Dave with a grin then looked back at her.

“My bedroom is that way” Dave pointed to the left with a dark smile on his face.

“You’re such a pig, Dave!” Anita laughed “You couldn’t hunt me down with your own charm so this opportunity becomes handy for you, huh?” she joked with him while she stood up and walked next to Dave to pour some orange juice for herself.

“Hunt you down with my own charm? No, Anita, you have no idea what I’m capable of” he answered. There was no bluster in his voice just the hard overtone of his hurt self-esteem.

“Oh, Mr. Self-Respecting Dave Gahan had spoken…” Martin folded his arms, watching the two of them standing in the kitchen. Anita leant to the counter with her butt and sipped from her juice.

“Tell me, if you have any objections, Mart” Dave turned to him with a dark glimpse.

“Oh come on, what objection could I possibley have?” he shrugged and poured some wine for himself.

“Tell me Martin, why does this attract you?”

“You want to talk the whole night long?” Anita asked over her glass.

“What does the pretty lady wants?” Dave turned to her with a mesmerizing smile.

“Well, I don’t know…” she smiled with her most seductive look “Maybe you could show me this and that from your repertoire, Mr. Gahan…”

Dave just lifted his hand and motioned to the left.

“Well, this wasn’t too tempting…” she ran her hands along the front of his black shirt.

“True” he breathed and gently touched Anita’s sensitive neck with his fingertips.

She half-closed her eyes, grabbing the edge of the counter, and felt that her neck broke out in goose bumps. Dave leant closer and inhaled the scent of her skin deeply. His lips barely brushed over hers, but soon he started kissing her deeply. She’d been waiting for this moment for so long – even if she had to hide it from Martin and from herself as well. But now that she had the green light, she looked into Dave’s eyes with a little smile then she went for another kiss so she could taste his mouth again. Somewhere knowing that they were doing this in front of Martin it turned her own. She put her arms around Dave’s neck and deepened their kiss. Dave playfully sucked on her lower-lip, his skilled tongue chased hers and his fingers were softly caressing her body.

After a few moments of enjoying this, Anita broke the kiss and shot a quick glance toward the smiling Martin then took Dave’s hand and with a grin she started pulling him towards the bedroom “Well this was something, Mr. Gahan… I can’t wait for you to show me more…”

“And I cannot wait for you to become my victim” Dave answered with a dark smile.

“Your victim? What do you mean? What’d you do to me? Or what will you?” she walked – now holding both of his hands – and after they stepped into the bedroom, she led them around his body.

“Dunno… What can you take… from me?”

“Uh, this sounded very dangerously… How wide is the repertoire?” she asked and started slowly unbuttoning the black shirt.

“You have no idea” he grinned then pulled her to him and his long fingers slid under her red top. She sighed quietly and she let him quickly take it off.

“I guess, Martin mentioned that after getting turned on… I like it rough…” she whispered the end of the sentence into his ear then she gently bit into his earlobe.

“No, I think he left me figure out everything… or at least at the beginning.”

Hearing this she looked at the blonde man, who just walked into the room with a little smile on his face and he returned the kiss she’d sent from the other end of the room.

“Then you already have one useful information about me…” she smiled back at Dave and sighed when the strong hands slid from her breasts to her butt “Grab me!” she asked hoarsely, her body already on fire.

“As you wish…” Dave answered and grabbed Anita rough while his sharp teeth bit into her neck and he started sucking on her skin.

“Oh god, that’s it!!” she cried out and let her head fall back. She started unbuttoning that useless shirt of his and greedily stroked it down from his body, scratching his shoulders.

“You should show me something as well. I want something in return… Just giving and not getting isn’t so fun” Dave said as he pressed his already hard cock to her groin through the fabric of his trousers.

“Well, well, well… are we this excited already?” she stroked along the front of Dave’s trousers and she smiled contentedly hearing his low moan. She tugged on his belt and slowly undid it, her fingers playing with the button and the zipper. “Oh my… this time we have underwear? Uh-oh, Mr. Gahan, I’ll be disappointed in you…”

“I don’t wear them just on the stage. You know… tight trousers…” he moaned.

“Uh-oh… maybe you should do this more in your everyday life as well…” she answered and pushed down his pants and underwear, touching the nice butt and thighs then one of her hands slid onto his hardness.

“Don’t let it go!” he moaned.

“And if I do?” she joshed, touching him just with her fingertips, but she took mercy on him and she slid her hand back on him and the other discovered lower regions too.

“Then I’ll rape you right in front of Martin.”

Anita felt her mouth going dry from the idea and her legs started shaking as she looked up into Dave’s eyes, seeing that he really would do it! He’d be able to do it! She was already moist between her legs as she was standing in front of this divine man.

“Well… though I was ready to give you some nice blow-job….” she said finally and a little smile crossed her face, cuz she started pulling her hand away.

“Do it!” Dave barked at her.

“What exactly?” she joshed with him again, playing with fire.

Dave put his hand on her shoulder and roughly pushed her down onto her knees. He fisted his hand in her hair and pulled her head to him “Lick!”

Anita decided to play along with him – for now – and she slowly licked the hard cock all along.

“Don’t hold yourself back” Dave moaned from the warm, wet tongue’s touch. And Anita took his advice… Her hand moved on the hard and long cock unstoppably then her hungry mouth had joined the dance too to finally taste Dave’s hardness in all of its glory.

He groaned loudly on his strong voice, throwing his head back and his fingers got lost in the long hair. He could feel Martin’s gaze on his body and this just turned him on even more, rushing more blood into his groin, making him harder and bigger. She was doing her job enthusiastically. She set an excitingly slow pace then she licked along the venous throbbing cock, keeping one eye on Martin. A little surprised smile appeared in the corner of her mouth seeing that the slightly flushed blonde man was sitting there - his mouth half-opened - and his hand was pumping his freed dick. Dave glanced to the side as well and he had to growl from the sight. He didn’t drag her up yet, he let himself get lost deeper and deeper in his pleasure. Anita breathed a soft kiss onto the cock, which was glistening from her saliva and her free hand opened her trousers. Not waiting for Dave to move she stood up, kissed the man - so he could taste himself on her lips - then she led his hand to her trousers, showing him what she wanted. And Dave understood it: the black trousers landed on the floor so he could freely grab and squeeze the revealed skin. She moaned and searched for the singer’s mouth, putting her arms around his neck and pressing her body to his to feel his hardness by her lower-tummy.

“So… I’ve stopped… What’ll you do now?” she whispered onto his mouth.

“Now comes that part when I tear you apart and rape you” Dave said with a dark look. He wasn’t lying.

“Then show me something…” she quickly licked his lower-lip while she danced out of his hands. Dave caught her as fast as the lightning and pushed his victim down to the bed. He was right over her and pinned her wrists roughly to the sheet.

“Did you know that Martin had leather-straps in the past?” he asked.

She could answer just after a moan as she tried to free her hands “Really?” her eyes flashed “No, he haven’t told me about this yet…”

She thought that she heard chuckling from the corner. She turned her head that way and saw Mart grinning like mad, still moving his hand on himself lazily.

“Yes he has some. Sadly I don’t think that he brought them here with him, but next time, if we meet again, I’ll expect to have them with you” he looked at his blonde mate at the end of the sentence.

“Deal” the other man grinned then waved towards them with his free hand “Please, go on! You’re very exciting!” his eyes flashed.

Dave just laughed then turned back to his victim. He didn’t say a word just gave her a bruising kiss then went down to her neck and chest. One of his hands let her wrists go and slid easily downwards until it reached its goal and he pushed his fingers into the girl. Anita’s whole body tensed and she cried out from the sudden move, trying to free her hands above her head.

Dave chuckled again “No, I won’t let you go.”

“Why not?” she asked, but didn’t pay too much attention – she was still trying to free her wrists. She lifted one of her legs, trying to force it between their bodies, wanting to push him away like this.

“What’re ya up to?” he asked back while he moved his fingers faster.

Anita moaned again but tried to hold herself back “To put up a fight, what else?” she moved her whole body, straining against Dave. She turned around and was about to free her hands with a twist. Dave let her go and pushed her back onto her back. She moaned, but Dave had to change position and this way she had enough room to quickly close her legs, pushing her knees to Dave’s chest, keeping him away.

“You think this’ll help?” Dave chuckled and started separating her legs.

Anita moaned a few times from the straining, watching him with a little smile “This turns you on, isn’t it?” she grinned with half-closed eyes.

“Sure. Isn’t it obvious?”

Anita glimpsed down at the rock-hard cock and chuckled “Weeeell….” and she playfully propped herself up, sliding backwards on the sheet, ‘escaping’. But Dave – like a big cat jumping out from its hiding while hunting – sprang at Anita. With a few adept moves he forced her legs open to make her ‘vulnerable’ again. “And what’ll you do now?” he asked leaning to her breasts and started tasting them.

“Well…” she panted from the firm grips and from the weight of his body on hers “I think… I rest a bit and collect some strength” she giggled “But I won’t give up, don’t you dare to think…” she tensed her arm-muscles.

“Oh I’m absolutely sure you won’t. But are you ready for this…?” he asked and without waiting for her reaction he moved forward with his hips, penetrating her deeply. Anita cried out loud, throwing her head back into her pillow then she looked at Dave panting, her eyes dark from desire. Burning heat washed over her body and felt that her skin became sweaty, but she didn’t care. She cared just about the feeling as Dave’s hard cock was moving between her legs.

“Oh my god!” she let her head fall back again, her veins on her neck popping out.

“Yes?” he asked, turning both of them on even more with his steady rhythm.

Anita tired to swallow, but her mouth was completely dry from panting and from the feeling as Dave’s body brushed over hers again and again. She felt herself blushing as she looked down to where their bodies were joined and from the sight another wave of desire rushed through her veins. She picked up Dave’s rhythm and her hips started to move with his as she propped herself up on her forearms.

“David…” she finally managed to moan and she put all of her longing for him from the last few months into this one word.

“Yes?” he panted back, pulling himself back. He didn’t want to come yet, he still wanted to enjoy the girl and the fact that Martin’d offered her. He wanted to enjoy the situation that Anita – Martin’s girlfriend – wanted him this much… And this made him satisfied. His blonde mate’s offer had turned him on. He didn’t want to finish a probably long night yet. He slowed down to give her slower, but deeper and more intensive thrusts, circling his hips time after time.

“This… is better than I’ve imagined!” she broke out, loosing her mind when Dave circled his hips again. She felt that all the resistance she felt in her shaking body has started melting away in this heat. She wanted more, although she knew that she was already close. For a moment she thought. She hoped that if she turns her head to Martin, she won’t see any offence on his face for saying such things to Dave. Finally – between two moans – she pulled herself together and turned to the left to search for her lover’s eyes with her cloudy gaze. Martin was still sitting in the armchair, although now he was fixing the ceiling as he got lost in the pleasures he caused to himself.


	9. Chapter 9

9.

Anita waited until Martin lifted his head and looked at them then she waved him closer. She bit down on her lip and watched him stand up. He quickly pulled his T-shirt over his head and slipped down his trousers. She moaned loudly from Dave’s moves and felt that their juices already made the bed wet under them, but she still feasted her eyes on Martin as he knelt onto the bed and let her left hand slid onto his rock-hard cock. Dave looked at Martin with those well-known deep-green eyes. But Anita didn’t let them dive into each other gaze for too long, because she slid her hand onto Mart’s butt to pull him closer. She sat up half-way and licked along the other nice cock, searching eye-contact with her lover.

Dave saw her uncomfortable pose and slid out of her “Don’t you want to change position?”

“What’s on your mind?” she sighed from the feeling as Dave’s body had left hers.

“On all fours” Dave barked.

Anita smiled and with some difficulty she turned around. For a moment she felt that the sheet stuck to her back, thanks the sweat. Meanwhile she left room for Martin too, who propped his back to the pillows and the headboard, his legs spread open. He let her crawl between his legs and prop herself on her forearms. While one of Anita’s hands grabbed the base of Mart’s shaft, she glimpsed back at Dave, spreading her legs for him and her gaze was so dirty that even Dave had to swallow hard from it.

Dave didn’t hesitate for too long – he knelt behind her and he was already in her wet channel with an easy move. He grabbed Anita’s ass, squeezed her waist or leant forward to grab her tits, but he couldn’t stop himself: he looked Martin in the eye.

The blond man moaned and returned the glimpse when Anita turned her attention to his throbbing member again. She got totally lost in the sea of pleasures. She moaned more and more and soon she’d reached the point where nothing else mattered for her. She felt herself like a cheap whore and this is why she easily said what she wanted the most in that moment…

“I want you both!” she cried out from Dave’s harder thrust.

Dave froze “What do you mean?”

“I mean it as it sounded!” she glimpsed back then looked up at Mart “I want to feel both of you inside of me…” she whispered the last sentence on such a tone that Mart had to moan.

“Are you sure?” her lover asked.

“Absolutely” Anita growled lustfully.

Martin didn’t answer just nodded and ran his fingertips on her face and glistening shoulder. Then after Dave slid out of her to give room for changing positions, Mart quickly slid under her and waited for Dave to wet his hard cock even more in her hot pussy. He slid out of her and after preparing her, he positioned himself to her hole and started his little circles as he slowly pressed himself deeper and deeper into her.

Dave nearly went insane from this. Although he’d done this before… this was something different. Totally different. Most of all he didn’t want to hurt Anita. He knew that Mart took his place – even though his blonde friend was more expert in such things – because Mart was thicker and for the first time this procedure can be quite painful if not doing it carefully. They didn’t want to put this on Anita, to ruin this night. And there was something else too. He could feel the presence of his blonde mate and he wanted to pamper him too, but now he couldn’t do that and this made him even hornier. Now he had to pull himself back with all of his strength. He entered her gently when he felt it was time.

Anita moaned loudly and tried to relax her body as best as she could. First it was a bit painful, but she felt that Dave was very careful with her and she appreciated this. And when he started his soft moves in her, the pain started to fade away and she groaned. Then she moaned Martin’s name. He kissed her, but he didn’t want to rush things. He wanted to wait for Dave, he wanted to move with him in union. Anita closed her eyes and concentrated on her body – she started enjoying it more and more as Dave slid deeper into her.

“Martin! Please! Come… come into me at last!” she threw her head back with closed eyes.

Mart smiled and gently slid into her, finding Dave’s rhythm. She moaned on her shaking hands like never before, while she let the boys’ synchronized moves wash over her again and again.

“Oh my god!!” she yelled through the mist of her pleasure and jerked as Martin’s fingers slid onto her clit, while his left hand reached up next to Anita’s waist to stroke Dave’s side unnoticeably. Dave growled from the feeling and couldn’t stop himself – he let Anita’s side go and stroked along the other man’s forearm. But he put his hand back on her waist to hold her steady. Martin’s touches fired him up even more and he accelerated his speed.

From this the girl between them moaned and screamed even louder and nearly without a break. “Boys… how are things for… you? Cuz I… I’m almost… oh my god! I’m almost…. there!” she moaned and panted and cried out again as Martin licked along her throat and bit into her breast.

“I’m… close!” Dave panted.

“Me… too!” came the other answer from somewhere under her.

“Then… don’t… hold yourself back!” she squeezed her eyes shut with a distorted face and felt a sweat drop run down her temple and from the next push she screamed, because suddenly her orgasm’s wild wave washed over her, making all her inner-muscles dance. This turned the boys on even more – just like the long lustful scream she gave to them while she bucked against them. And it was enough for Dave to slide all the way into her and shot his load with a loud howl. Anita jerked from the feeling as the pulsating cock strained inside of her and Dave’s hot load oozed out of her. She had to moan – just like she had to do so from Mart’s accelerating moves as his hips moved upwards again and again, moaning on a low tone, grabbing and scratching Anita’s back or Dave’s arm.

Dave panted and waited for the well-known yells to come. He wanted to feel Anita tighten around him again, so he stayed buried into her. The blonde man squeezed his eyes shut and concentrated. After a wild and rough move – which she loved – he climaxed with a yell. And he felt that her body strained again and she cried out as her body welcomed his release too. She was screaming as if someone tried to kill her, but this was way better. Her shaking arms couldn’t take it any longer. She was shaking and panting as she collapsed onto Martin. She still felt him inside of her, but she sighed as she realized that Dave had already slid out of her. For a few minutes she couldn’t talk at all.

“Are you okay?” the blonde man asked and stroked out her wet black hair from her flushed face which she rested on his chest.

“Oh” she giggled “I’m tired, but… it’s divine” she panted.

“Then everyone is satisfied?” Dave grinned then he lay down right next to them, stroking along his own sweaty body, still panting.

“For tonight, yes” she answered.

“Uh-oh, Mart, what a wild kitty you have there!” Dave laughed and stroked along his friend’s thigh unnoticeably.

“An insatiable little kitty” the blonde man laughed.

Anita found the peace she felt strange. She saw this situation – as she was lying between these two men, bathing in the heat of their body – an intimate moment. She felt on her skin as their bodies were fighting for air, she felt their voices resonating and she felt their hot touches. She knew that Mart loved her and Dave chased his desires, which she was able to satisfy. She was proud of herself and happy. She nestled to them – in a way that allowed her to feel both of their skins on her – and soon fell asleep.

\---

But the boys didn’t follow her – Martin was gently stroking his lover’s back as she put one of her arms around the musician lying on his back.

“Hm. It was a strange night” Dave said.

“Don’t think it’s over” the blonde man smiled “Just watch – a few hours and she’ll beg for the next round…”

Dave laughed “Until that I have to get my strength back” he answered and slowly crawled out of bed to disappear in the kitchen. He returned with a chocolate bar. He looked at Martin asking him silently to follow him onto the huge balcony.

Mart just shook his head as he looked at his friend, who was already eating up that chocolate then carefully got out of the bed and put on his boxers before following Dave.

Dave was already sitting by one of the tables and ate some of the choc, lost in his thoughts.

“Can I have a bite, or you protect your chock-doze fiercely again?” Mart asked and sat down next to him.

“Please, serve yourself” Dave smiled and went on after a short pause “Martin… I want to ask something.”

“Shoot” he pulled up one of his legs after breaking off a piece of the choc and leant back in his chair.

“How much do you want to tell to her about… us?”

“Why? What’s with us?” he bent his head back and licked off the choc from his fingers.

“You’re a mean bastard, you know it, don’t you?” Dave smiled as he watched Martin’s tongue.

“Why?” he asked and licked off his mouth too as he watched the stars above their heads.

“Because you tease me and you know that I don’t like it and you fuckin’ enjoy it” Dave smiled.

“What’re you talking about?” he looked at him with surprise “I just ate the choc.”

Dave laughed out loud then returned to the previous topic “So?”

“I thought, you don’t want to talk about it anymore” he lifted an eyebrow as he put his elbows onto the armrests, entwined his fingers and stretched his legs in front of him.

“You don’t have any clue why?”

“Tell me why.”

“You think it’s because I find it – you – gross?”

“I don’t know, you never gave me an explanation. You always avoided this topic if it came up” he shrugged and looked at his mate.

“Hm… you’re right. Why did you touch me, Mart?” he asked calmly.

“I don’t know” he shrugged again, looking at his own toes under the table “People do lots of things in the heat of the act…”

“You really don’t know?” Dave looked at him with his green eyes. It was as if a little hint of sadness has appeared in them.

Martin sighed, bent his head back and for a moment he searched for the best answer. “I felt like I had to do it” he said finally.

“Hm” Dave smiled faintly and bent his head “I still…” he stopped for a moment and sighed.

“You still what?” Martin asked quietly and turned to him.

“The reason why I don’t want to talk about that night with you isn’t because I find it gross and I want to erase it from my mind” he glimpsed up into Mart’s green eyes.

“Then what is it?” he smiled faintly, but encouragingly.

“It’s because I still yearn for it.”

Martin’s smile got wider then he glimpsed down at his hands and sighed. “Is it better that you said it?”

Dave gave it a thought “We can say. But I still don’t know your answer.”

“You know… I’ve been waiting for you to say it” he smiled to himself watching the lights on the Hudson.

“Why?”

“David, you’re not the only one who knows body-language” he laughed softly “Do you know how long I’ve been suspecting that you feel like this?”

“No. How long?”

“Are you kidding me?” he shook his head a bit “I saw that sometimes – when you thought that I don’t see it – you looked at me that way. But I didn’t want to bring it up… I didn’t want to… put you into an uncomfortable situation. I didn’t want this to catch you off guard…” he sighed again and took another piece from the choc.

“And what’s your opinion?”

“I thought that you’ll know it from my words” he smiled at Dave and ate the dark choc.

“True” Dave smiled. He wasn’t surprised. Martin always had his dirty fantasy, which allured him like a moth to the flame “And Anita?” he went back to his first question.

“What’s with her?” he got lost in his own little world a bit.

“Well, if you allow these encounters to her and to me in the future, I cannot promise that I can do this without going crazy, Martin. If we have to keep this from her and I cannot touch you. It’s already hard. And… it hurts. It tortures me. Don’t make it even harder, please.”

“You want me this badly?”

“I go crazy for you” Dave looked at him, but his eyes told much more than just crazy lust.

Martin smiled to himself a bit and returned the hot glimpse. “I want you too, David. Since that night. But despite everything, I don’t think that Anita is ready for us.”

“Then what do you want to do?”

“A secret relationship won’t turn you on? Because I want make love to you, David. I want it badly…” he eyed the naked man hotly from head to toe.

“If you promise me that you’ll tell it to Anita after you’re sure that she can bear it. I don’t want to deny myself constantly. But… if I can’t feel you, I’ll slowly go crazy.”

“If you go on like this, I think my pants’ll get tight” Mart noted and breathed in deeply.

“It’s okay, Martin. It’s high time for you to know how I feel all the time” he leant towards him, leaning onto the table.

“You think I don’t know how it feels?” he copied Dave’s move so his lips got close to his.

“Tell me more about it, Mart” Dave whispered. He felt that every muscle in his body was tensing. It was ages ago since he was this close to Martin. It was getting hard to hold himself back.

But he just smiled and stroked along the singer’s face then he pulled him closer so their lips could meet. He inhaled Dave’s familiar scent deeply. First his mate returned the kiss gently then he went for Martin wilder and he wanted to pull the other’s body even closer to him.  
Martin’s whole body was covered with goose bumps as he felt Dave’s hands on him, pulling him closer and closer to him. He wouldn’t have thought that there was this much desire burning inside of the singer. Dave turned Martin to him. He didn’t want to let him go. He couldn’t take it anymore: he attacked his mouth fiercely again while his long fingers started to move. Dave’s steadiness took Martin’s breath away as he rested his own hand on the singer’s hip, returning the passionate kiss. But Dave wanted more – much more. His long fingers were already by the hem of Mart’s boxers and in the next moment they disappeared under it.

But Martin reached after his wrist and gently – but firmly – pulled his hand away, although his body screamed for more. “David, don’t” he asked quietly.

“What’s the problem?” Dave whispered. Even his voice was shaking from lust.

“I don’t think this’d be a good idea now… We’re on a balcony and… Anita is sleeping inside…”

“You cannot leave me here like this… Do you feel it?” Dave took his hand and put it around his rock-hard cock “No offense, but Anita hadn’t had this effect on me” he looked into the green eyes “Please.”

Martin smiled softly and breathed a short kiss onto his mate’s hungry lips “Alright” he gave up “Sit down!”

Dave did as he was told and watched Mart’s next move with his dark look. The blonde man kissed him again and knelt in front of him, opening Dave’s legs. His lips quickly followed a line from Dave’s neck, down on his chest to his tummy, because he saw how badly he wanted his touches. He looked up at him as he gently put one hand around him. Dave moaned loudly – it was clear form his eyes how long he’s been waiting for this and how much he enjoyed Martin’s touches now.

Martin could imagine what his friend had to go through and he wanted to help him, so he didn’t hesitate too much. Knowing that someone can see them in any moment – although it wasn’t likely on the shadowy balcony, especially because their building was higher than most of the other ones. He soon took the hard and throbbing cock between his wet lips. He moved his head intensely, heightening Dave’s ecstasy.

Dave’s fingers got lost in the blond curls and he started pulling them hard or he scratched Martin wherever he could reach him. Loud moans have left his mouth and his hips came to alive soon. The blonde man glimpsed up and saw how much his mate enjoyed his pampering, so he put one hand around him too, helping his moves as he licked and sucked on the cock in his mouth. He could still feel Anita’s taste on it. Dave was out of his mind from the pleasures Mart caused. He felt that soon he’ll cum, but he tried to hold himself back as long as he was able. Then he exploded into Mart’s mouth, crying out loud. As Martin heard his yell, he reached up and covered Dave’s mouth with his hand, not to draw attention on them, because he heard how Dave’s voice echoed while he was greedily swallowing his hot seed. It was ages ago and he shivered, trying to suppress the longing in his groin.

When he could stay silent, Dave leant his head to the wall and panted. His chest moved up and down quickly. A few more times Martin stroked along the relieved member then he slowly stood up, giving a kiss onto Dave’s neck and he looked into his eyes “Better?” he smiled.

“A bit” Dave smiled too then quickly got up and pressed Mart against the concrete balustrade to kiss him “But I’d like to taste you too.”

“I think we should do that another time” he said with a smile, digging his fingers into Dave’s wet hair by his nape, although his groin protested against this.

“Why are you doing this to me, hm?” Dave smiled.

“What?”

“Denying yourself from me.”

“It’s more exciting this way, isn’t it? I like pushing the limits” he stroked along the tattooed chest.

“When will I have you?” Dave narrowed his eyes, which made him look like a predator.

“I don’t know” he shrugged, saving this wild look for himself. He loved it when his friend looked at someone like this. Often he imagined himself into the place of those women, who got this glimpse during the years and he witnessed it.

Dave took Mart’s shoulder and whispered into his mouth “You don’t know… Well, it’ll be very soon, you can be sure about that” he smiled then went inside.

Martin closed his eyes and moaned quietly from Dave’s sentence. Then – like someone who cannot see or hear – he went back to the bedroom. He had to find relief! His groin throbbed painfully, but he liked torturing himself like this. As he stepped in, he looked at Anita, who was about to wake up. He quickly climbed over her and opened her legs, checking with his fingers if the warm and sleepy body was ready for him. Suddenly – but not too roughly – he slid into the girl.


	10. Chapter 10

10.

For a few days Dave couldn’t deal with Martin and Anita – he had to sing up the songs without a break, but he was in a very good mood, even though being closed in the studio for long hours made him nervous, but Martin’s presence helped a lot. He could calm him down with one look and when no one saw it, he even touched him, which helped too. So in brief: they were at the end of a week when the singer didn’t smash anything to the wall. He’d spent a lot of time on the roof with the birds and plants, listening to the birds’ singing.

Anita was under the influence of her birthday for a couple of days. There was no doubt that this was her best birthday. She still couldn’t believe that all this had happened to her; that her pitiful life has changed this much! Although she thought that after all those bad things she deserved something good as well! And being with the boys was good for her, although since that night she was just with Martin. She couldn’t stop thanking him for that wonderful evening. This day was special for her too, because in the afternoon she’ll go to the studio and record some videos for the first time. The boys were in good shape, the atmosphere was great – which she knew will look good on the short vids. But first she decided that, after greeting the busy boys in the studio, she’ll go upstairs to clear her head on the fresh air. As she stepped out to the roof, she saw Dave standing by the railing. She smiled on the torn jeans and worn-out grey tee then she quietly walked over him and ran her hand on his back.

“Hey there! Why aren’t you with the boys?”

“Hi” Dave greeted her too, but didn’t turn around. It was clear on his slightly hoarse voice that he was smiling. “I rest a bit. I deserve it. And I think my vocal cords too. The others said for me to get my bum up here to take a break, cuz it wouldn’t be good if I my voice failed me during singing. So I’m just standing or sitting here, drinking tea with honey, listening to the birds and I watch those annoyingly moving little dots on the streets, enjoying that I’m over them, watching them, and they don’t know about my presence.”

Anita laughed quietly “So you’re megalomaniac again?” she joshed and stroked the venous hand on the rail.

“Sorta” he glimpsed at her with a smile “And what’s with you? I haven’t seen you around for a while.”

“I’ll start recording the working process today. I’ll try to take a few nice pictures as well. Your poor fans are very hungry for some news” she smiled “By the way… I’ve been thinking a lot about the other night.”

“And what did you think about?”

“About how amazing it is that this really happens to me!” she smiled.

“So… you’ve enjoyed it?” Dave asked with a naughty smirk.

“What kind of a question is this? Maybe you haven’t felt it?” she asked with a dark smile “Cuz if you haven’t then maybe I wasn’t clear enough…” she ran her index-finger along his forearm.

“And if you weren’t clear enough, what’d you do?”

“Maybe we should repeat it – not to let you in the dark” she bit down on her lower-lip.

Dave smiled then it faded away and his face became serious. “Anita, I hope you know that first of all you’re Martin’s girlfriend!”

“Of course I know. I’m clear with that. I love him” she nodded with a serious look “You know, in case he didn’t give me ‘permission’ to this open relationship, I would’ve resisted you, even if it was hard like hell.”

“It’s good to hear. Because I expect you to love him, to be with him more than with me, that you both feel happy for each other and not for anyone else. I come into the picture just occasionally. I have a family too and I love them. And” here he leant to her ear to whisper in it “if accidentally or intentionally you plan to hurt him by using me or anyone else…” he took a deep breath “then it’ll be better for us to part ways and if I never see you again, cuz you’d regret that very much” he straightened up and spoke on his normal volume on his hoarse voice “I don’t meant it as a threat. I just want you to know the limits. Your relationship should stay normal – as much as it’s possible.”

“You don’t have to worry, I wasn’t planning anything like that. For me Martin is the most important” she nodded “I’ve got enough from life to value what I have and don’t gamble away my luck.”

“Good. I thought that you’re a clever, experienced girl and finally not a brainless conventional doll, who seem to like being around us.”

“I think I’m far from that category” she shrugged “And this isn’t me having a big face, just a simple fact.”

“I know and I’m glad” Dave smiled honestly “And what’ll you do when we finish recording in New York? Will you move in with Mart?”

“Well… we haven’t really talked about this” she scratched her nape. She felt herself blushing a bit “You know, I still have to finish my studies at the university” she looked down at the by-passers.

“Still 3 years… I’ve never finished collage” Dave confessed “When I was young – and especially then – I didn’t feel that I should. I wasn’t sure about why I have to go to school at all. My poor mother… it was hard for her. I had some police issues as well.”

“Uhm… how do you know how much I have left from school? Did Mart tell you my age?” she looked at him, frowning.

“Yep” he looked at her.

“And it isn’t a problem for you? Just because Martin freaked out a bit.”

“Nope. I’m not the one you’re in a relationship with.”

“But I’ve slept with you too…” she noted quietly.

“And does anyone else know about it? Can you… prove it?”

“No. I don’t snitch” she leant against the railing with her back and started examining the sky.

“If you did, no one would be too interested. Probably they’d think that it’s just a fan’s vivid fantasy.”

“Probably. I guess you’d deny it without any pricks of coincidence.”

“Sure. But not because of you. Because of me and my family. I’m sorry, but I wouldn’t risk my family because of you, no matter how much I like you. So if it came out, I’d lie, yes.”

“Sure, I can understand that. After all your family is more important than a casual fuck” she nodded, following the flight of a bird.

“I wouldn’t say it was just a casual fuck.”

“Then what is that?”

“The models, whom I specifically hunt. It’s amazing what they do for me just to get into my bed and make me literally throw them out of my room in the morning. But most of the time I don’t wait for the morning. They stay until the sex lasts – if it’s over, they can go.”

“Does this happen often?” she turned her head towards Dave, still leaning against the rail.

“It depends on my mood” Dave shrugged.

“It’s not a real answer. By the way, I though that you don’t do such things by now. That you’ve calmed down, compared to your younger self.”

“I’ve calmed down” he looked her in the eye.

“Do you still want me?” Anita asked without thinking “I mean now that you had me.”

“Why are you asking me this?”

“I’m just interested in your answer. Cuz I cannot really understand why you wanted me in the first place. I’m not your type as I know. And I’m not sure whether you wanted me just because I’m Martin’s girlfriend or not.”

“I like it when a woman wants and excites me. You did both very easily, but in the same time you still had your attitude to stay faithful to Martin. I liked that. I didn’t really wanted to hunt you down or anything – I respect Martin’s, Andy’s and even Alan’s girlfriends or wives. Of course girlfriends occurred mainly in the past. So, the chicks of the other band members are taboo. It isn’t worth it risking the future of the band with this. Then your birthday came and it was Mart’s idea.”

“And you were more than willing to go into it, right?” she smiled a bit.

“I didn’t say no” he smiled back.

“Yes, I felt that” she winked “And now that you’ve said that girlfriends are taboo, you won’t touch me at all?” she added with a little smile and a questioning look.

“I think you can count on this kind of nights in the future, like we had on your birthday. But otherwise no. If you want that, I’m not the one you should first talk about it.”

“I see” she nodded “It was good to clear these things.”

“Yes.”

“Well okay, I let you rest. But come down soon, I want to start the videos” she winked at him and headed for the door.

“You’re shooting a porno movie?” Dave asked “Cuz Martin is still okay, but a naked Andy? Nonononoooo!”

Anita nearly choked from laughing hard “You crazy pig!!! Be careful, or at the end Fletch’ll have the main role!”

“You’ll be a millionaire” Dave giggled “And women will go crazy for Fletch.”

“I’m sure!” she laughed back then entered the building, still giggling.

Dave stayed up there and started thinking about the future of their little trio. And the fact that Anita wants to sleep with him – just with him… for now he couldn’t handle this, because she was different than Dave’s previous occasional girlfriends. And there was Martin too. They’ll have to tell to her. After a while.

\---

The blond man was thinking a lot in the last couple of days as well. The recording in the studio – when he had to play the guitar on some tracks – gave nice opportunities to get lost in his thoughts, he knew his parts by heart – but of course sometimes he glimpsed down on the strings. He saw on Anita that she’d enjoyed that night they gave to her with Dave very much. Well, he was a bit afraid of its outcome, that maybe she’ll change sides and will go over to his friend, cuz even though he never said, he knew that for a lot of people Dave was more attractive than he. But of course he couldn’t complain, but he couldn’t do anything against the facts. He hoped that Anita’ll let their relationship develop and that the singer won’t disturb it too much. Mart saw how she looked at Dave today… He has to talk with her about this. The other thing which was on his mind was Dave and his confession on the balcony… Mart didn’t suspect that the suppressed desires will break out from the singer with such intensity. The blonde man nearly died for one touch of his too, now that they committed themselves, but for now he didn’t know how he could make both relationships work. He didn’t know how to tell to Anita that sometimes they’re more than friends to each other… They were in a quite slippery situation. But he felt that he wanted both relationships… He just has to figure out how to tell it to her. If she was a groupie, there’d be no problem, they’d take anything to be with them – it was another thing that he’d never make love to Dave in front of such a cheap slut. But Anita was far from this category because of her sensitiveness – among others… She caused a headache to him sometimes…

\---

Anita soon got down on the stairs where Martin was playing on his guitar in one of the soundproofed rooms, while an unknown man was sitting next to Christian, adjusting some buttons on one of the mixing tables. She didn’t want to disturb them, and she wanted to wait with the videos until she was introduced to the man.

He waited until Mart ended his part then used a mic to tell him that he wanted the end again. The blonde man reluctantly nodded and started when the man waved to him. This time he played it without a mistake then he came out from the room.

“Well, Andrew?” he walked behind him.

“It’ll be good now. I replay it.”

“Wait a minute, first I want to introduce my girlfriend” he waved for Anita who was sitting on the couch, but now she stood up and walked to the man. “Anita, he’s Andrew Phillpott, one of our workmates and Dave’s good friend.”

“If I’m right, you worked with Dave on his solo album as well, right?” she smiled and shook his hand.

“Yes, it’s true. As I see you’re well-informed” the stubbly man smiled back.

“I liked your collaborations with Dave.”

“Thanks. It’s always good to hear this. And I’ve heard about you. How long will you stay with us?” he asked.

“Well… until Martin can take it.”

“Hey, don’t say such things!” Martin embraced her waist “By the way, if she turns on the camera, she’ll take a few videos like Andy did during recording Exciter and Dave did while you were working on Hourglass… Well, but I think they’ll be more serious than that” he laughed typically.

“Maybe I’ll let him play with the camera. I liked him fooling around. I had some good laughs, but it showed that being in the studio isn’t his thing that much. And now” she gently hit the back of Mart’s head “you made him sing too much!”

“Ouch! But it was his fault!” he pouted “He didn’t warm his voice up properly and yesterday he ate ice-cream with Rosie!”

“Uh-oh” Anita sighed “Men…”

“Why are you saying this now???” the blonde man looked confused.

“It’s hard with you…” she said while she adjusted her camera “Well, I think until Dave arrives, I’ll rather take some photos. I’ll wait for him with the videos. But of course I’ll sneak up to the roof and take some pics of him as well” she smiled.

“Uhm… it isn’t easier with you women either…” Mart mumbled under his nose “Alright sweetheart, feel free to go” Martin joshed.

“Can I call you sweet apple pie?” Anita asked with innocent eyes.

“I think it won’t suit me” he pulled up his nose and smacked Anita’s butt to gently get her moving “You should rather drag that useless dude down.”

“I’m going, I’m going” she laughed and got up with some quick strides. Soon she was on the roof again. “Dave!”

“Yes?” he turned around, clearing his throat.

“Please, come down. In case you want to show off of course” she smiled and showed the cam in her hand.

“Oh, so you’ve already started the porn shooting?” he joked whispering on his husky voice.

“Sure. Andy and Martin are waiting just for you. Come and take off your clothes.”

“Be careful, cuz you know I’d do it…” he winked and passed her.

Anita just sighed with a smile then followed him. She spent the rest of the afternoon very creatively.

\---

Anita was sitting in their common bedroom with Martin and was checking the pictures on her laptop. It was a cheap old wreck without net-connection, but it was perfect to write her papers on it – this was the only reason she’d bought it. And she couldn’t afford to pay for the internet anyway. Now her laptop was handy, because this way she could check how the photos turned out. It was interesting that despite being with Martin, she still used her own money. She liked being independent a bit – in money at all events – although soon she’ll have to find a job. Taking pictures was just a hobby.

After Martin finished checking some papers he went to take a shower and after that he lay down onto the bed in one of the hotel’s fluffy bathrobes, propping up his back with the soft pillows. For a while he just watched his busy lover by the table. He was thinking and finally the decision was born – it was time to get over with that conversation.

“Anita, do you have some minutes? Can I ask you something?”

She looked up, nodded and in the next moment she was next to Martin.

“Listen… I’ve been thinking a lot… about the other night. I saw how much you enjoyed that finally you could be with Dave too… What do you feel about that?”

“What do you mean?”

“Well… I mean I’d like to know if you want him still…” he said carefully.

Anita looked absently into his eyes “Yes” she said “But I’m not cheating on you with him.”

He smiled and sighed. “You know, in the back of my mind I was afraid that that night’ll change you. I mean… I want to go on with our relationship and I want you to stay with me. I really appreciate that you’re not cheating on me with him, but you know, I’m an open-minded person and I want to give you everything I can. I want you to be happy… so this is why it wouldn’t disturb me if it turned out that you sleep with him - in case it was just about sex.”

“Now you’re encouraging me to sleep with Dave?” Anita looked at him in disbelief.

“I’m not encouraging you” he shook his head “I’m rather saying to do what feels good to you. If you want him, don’t torture yourself with the thought what’d I say about it in case you have sex with him. I simply leave this door open to you in our relationship. If you need Dave, I’m not standing in your way, but I don’t want to see things change too much. I mean I want you to belong to me… Do you understand?”

“Dave told me the same” she smiled.

“What?” he looked at her surprised as he was playing with the belt of his robe.

“Exactly this. He’d told me about your… habits. That girlfriends are taboos, but if you allow it, he’s more than willing to take his part in this. But he expects me to know that you’re the first for me and… he warned me not to cheat on you with him or anyone else just to hurt you, because he won’t be happy about that and he won’t stay silent about it either.”

Martin smiled warmly hearing Dave’s concerns. This warmed his heart and he felt grateful. Although, as he gave it some thoughts, he came to the conclusion that he’d do the same for him. “Good old David…” he said quietly.

“But… I still feel that if I ran to Dave, I’d cheat on you. I’m glad that you told me this, but I wouldn’t be able to do it yet.”

“Well, it’s good to hear” he smiled at her and stroked her soft face.

Anita just smiled and nuzzled to him. He embraced her with a smile too and kissed her lips before looking into her eyes, putting a stray of black hair behind her ear “Will you take a ride on me?”

“You’re already thinking of sex?” she giggled.

“Is it a sin that I want you in nearly every minute?”

“No, if you tell me more about this and your thoughts.”

“Why do you always want to make me talk?”

“Because I love listening to your voice and your pervert ideas.”

“I though you love it when I fulfill them…” he laughed already pulling off her halter and he had to moan from the sight “I love it when you’re not wearing a bra.”

“I love it when you say such things” she sighed and let Mart do whatever he wanted to do with her.

\---

The week has passed with hard work, but the good atmosphere has stayed in the studio. They fooled around a lot, but sometimes they explained some more serious technical stuff to Anita about her camera – mainly Andrew and Andy, because they were more normal than the other clowns. She had some good laughs on them even without Dave’s dolls. She wouldn’t have mind if he played with them on the videos. As Anita checked the fans’ responses she felt proud of herself, because they were very happy and grateful for the videos and those few pictures the guys allowed publishing. But she caught some things. A few times she accidentally took a picture as sometimes Mart and Dave touched by chance (?) for a few seconds. But she quickly found some explanation to herself that those were just coincidences or that those were because of the informal friendship that has developed between them during the long years. If she had known…


	11. Chapter 11

11.

Dave was sitting on the roof. He always came up here to rest a bit. The singing of the birds calmed him and only this could distract his thoughts from Martin. Thinking of him and the desire he felt for him tortured him more and more. He won’t be able to bear it for too long, he’ll spring on him if he cannot spend a few hours alone with him. He rather closed his eyes and listened to the little canary-birds song, enjoying the setting sun’s beams on his face and arms. After some long and calm minutes suddenly a bar of his favorite chocolate touched his shoulder.

“I thought you’d like to have some” the blonde man smiled at him.

“I’ll grow fat” he smiled up at Martin, but he took the choc and already opened it.

“I don’t think so” he laughed and walked to the rail to look down at the street then he turned towards the Hudson “You move enough.”

“But you could move me too” it slid out of Dave’s mouth.

Martin laughed quietly and dragged from his cigarette, watching the glistening sunlight on the water.

Dave stood up and with his long strides he walked behind Martin, putting his hands onto the rail next to Mart sides. “What are you looking at?” he whispered into his ear and deeply inhaled Mart’s unique and nice smell.

The other man smiled, because he knew that it was hard to Dave to deal with his ‘keeping the distance’ attitude. “At the sunset, you silly.”

“Well, okay, then I won’t disturb you” the singer whispered again and pulled away a bit.

Martin was still smiling and took another drag, but didn’t move. He knew that his mate’ll come back sooner or later anyway. And he was right – Dave didn’t move too far. He stepped next to Mart and folded his arms in front of his chest as he watched the sun setting between the buildings. Martin sighed and with a little smile he gave a peck on Dave’s face. He walked past him to the ashtray to drag out his cigarette. The singer watched him with a dark look.

“Oh and the boys are already gone and Anita went back to the hotel to rest a bit” he said over his shoulder “I’ll be downstairs for a while, practicing a bit on my guitar. If you’re bored, come down” Mart sent him a little evil smile and quickly disappeared on the stairs.

Dave watched him leaving. He was thinking. Should or shouldn’t he go after him? He knew that he was teasing him, he knew that Mart loved doing this to him. That old faggot loved that! He waited for a minute. Then he couldn’t take it anymore, his feet were already on the stairs.

The blonde man heard him coming down, although he was standing in the middle of the neighboring room, arms folded in front of his chest. Of course there was no guitar anywhere around him. He was waiting for Dave. He knew his friend too well… He knew that he’ll come after him. Dave stopped in the door. He saw no guitar or any other instruments.

“You’re a dirty pig” he said with a smile “I was bored” he added.

“And I was waiting for you” he smiled calmly.

“And why were you waiting for me?” Dave said leaning to the doorframe.

“Come here and I’ll tell you” he sent him a dark and hot look.

Even if he wanted to, Dave couldn’t resist this look. It allured him. He walked and stopped in front of him. The blonde man’s arms fell back to his own sides then he slowly lifted his right hand and stroked along Dave’s face. He was just watching the singer and let his breathing to pick up a quicker rhythm. He got lost in the dark eyes and let desire wash over him. He loved riding out this feeling. There was no way that Dave’d have taken off his gaze from Martin. He was staring at him. Then after a few minutes of intense longing Martin couldn’t take it anymore and he quickly and violently moved forward, attacking Dave’s mouth. Dave was surprised about this amount of emotion and he needed some moments before he started returning the kisses.

Martin didn’t pay attention to Dave’s needs – the singer brought this onto his head. He freed the animal side of Mart, which was locked up for so long. Mart grabbed Dave’s T-shirt by its neck and with a sudden move he tore it apart, not letting the soft lips go for a single second. They were already bleeding from his bites. Dave growled and let his wilder side go as well. He let his suppressed desires go and was already tearing off the clothes of Mart. The blonde musician let him do so, although he made it sure that his clothes survived the procedure, cuz he had no change here. But he didn’t take back from his élan. He soon reached for Dave’s belt and was already dragging down the pants and underwear from him then suddenly his fingers clenched around the semi-hard cock. He slowed down his moves and ran his hand along Dave’s length painfully slowly. He even lifted his chin as he looked at the singer. Dave growled again and went for Martin’s throat – his teeth have left some deep marks in the soft skin.

Martin cried out and freed himself from the grip of Dave’s teeth just to attack the swollen lips again, while his hand has already started pumping his hard cock.

“I was waiting… for this… for so long” Dave moaned.

“Well… now you’ll get it” Martin growled and started pushing the singer down to his knees by his shoulder “Get on your knees” he said the short command.

“You’ll need more to make me obey!” Dave growled back and bit into the other man’s collarbones.

“What do you want?”

“Try to make me obey. Let go of the things that are inside of you.”

“I’d do that if you weren’t holding me up” he flashed a smile at him.

“When did I give myself to you easily, Martin?”  
“When you were nearly begging for me on your very own balcony?”

“And that turned you on?”

“Oh yeah” he grabbed Dave’s ass with his free hand, while the other one didn’t stop moving for a second.

Dave just smiled and let him go with the flow. He’ll settle the score for this to Mart another time. But he wanted him so badly that now he didn’t want to fight with him. The blonde man appreciated this with a smile and gently pushed him down on his knees.

“I think it’s time for you to repay the loan…”

“At your service” Dave smiled and was already kneeling in front of him, loosening Mart’s belt to pull down the unnecessary trousers.

Martin had a little smile in the corner of his lips as he watched Dave’s moves and dug his fingers into his dark hair – he have been waiting for this moment for a long time too. And he could hold his burning desires back just this long. Dave’s fingers made his mate’s clothes disappear unbelievably quickly. The singer gave out a satisfied grunt from the view and he greedily put his lips around Mart, who moaned loudly from the feeling as the hot mouth took in his rapidly hardening shaft.

Dave was focused entirely on pleasing him and when he made him big and hard enough, he pulled back and looked into the green eyes. He was thinking about saying something, but he decided to stay silent. He wouldn’t be able to say anything to his blonde mate that he wouldn’t feel it in the same way he did. His lover looked down at him with darkly glistening eyes and stroked his face – brushing along the red lower-lip with his thumb – then he gently helped Dave stand up just to attack his mouth passionately. Dave was eating up Mart’s mouth, which he missed so much. He has been waiting for this for a really long time. It has been too long. He was about losing his mind.

And Martin felt the same, so with a sudden move he turned Dave around, grabbed his shoulders and pushed him down to his knees on the couch. He reached down for Dave’s hard cock while he was biting and kissing the tattooed back. By the time Dave could react, he was already kneeling on the couch and felt Mart’s bites on his back. He had to moan from this and his whole body started to shake in anticipation. His mate took the next step without a word, cuz he felt how much Dave wanted him. He let the singer’s rock-hard cock go and grabbed himself – sliding his hand all along himself a few times – while he wet the singer’s hole then he started teasing him with the tip of his big shaft.

“You do this deliberately?!” Dave asked on his animal-like voice.

“Of course! What did you think?” he chuckled on a deep tone “You want it?”

“How can you ask something like this?!”

The blond man answered with another short laughter and without any warning he started penetrating him unstoppably. Dave moaned out loud. The desire and need could finally find relief in him. He was grabbing the couch with a great force and his body tensed as he could finally feel his mate inside of him again. The picture came back into his head when Mart did this to him for the first time. He’d enjoyed it the same way.

Marin gave out a long groan, watching as he disappeared deeper and deeper in the singer. He nearly went insane from the tight embrace around his throbbing member. With a deep sigh he pulled out half-way then he started moving his hips to an accelerating rhythm and leaned forward to kiss Dave’s shoulder-blade.

“Oh… GOD! It’s so good!” Dave whined from the pleasure he felt.

Martin just smiled and licked his own lips as he straightened up again and ran his palm along Dave’s spine, while the other grabbed the perfect ass. He threw his head back when finally his whole length slid into Dave with a hard move. Dave groaned from the feeling and started panting as he got lost in the feelings Mart evoked inside of him. He was more then ready to welcome all of them. The blonde musician was bathing in the sea of emotions raging inside his own body, while he moved his hips unstoppable. He just groaned as he rode out the higher and higher waves of pleasure. His moves became greedier and faster. In an unexpected moment he reached forward and started pumping his mate’s hard cock mercilessly. Dave’s unarticulated groan was his answer. It was louder than usual, but no one could hear them.

Martin propped his forehead on Dave’s back and went on with fucking him hard, moaning onto the damp and fragrant skin, sometimes biting into it too. He’d missed this closeness very badly and he knew that from this thought and the stimuli he’ll come soon. Now his shaking body hurtled into his hard and he nearly roared with every deep thrust until with a wild and deep jerk he cried out and squeezed Dave’s cock hard. The singer didn’t need anything more – he gave some nice new strains to the couch.

Martin was still panting as he stroked his mate’s wet back while he slid out of him, his whole body shaking. As soon as Dave was able, he turned around just to pull his blonde lover close and pamper his lips and every reachable surface of his body with his sweet kisses. The blond man welcomed these kisses gratefully while he pushed him back a bit so he could lie down next to him on the narrow couch, taking deep breaths. Dave let him do so and when Mart nestled into a comfortable position, he pulled him even closer to him, putting his arm around him and resting his head on Mart’s chest. He listened to his breathing and heartbeats which got slowly calmer. Martin sighed and started caressing Dave’s shoulder and back. He was contented.

“I like being with you” the tired Dave murmured on his satisfied voice.

Martin chuckled and tightened his embrace around him a bit “Although I’m aggressive, aren’t I?”

“When did I say this?” he looked at him surprised.

“On Anita’s birthday, after the dinner” he smiled.

“I take it back” the singer smiled widely “I wish I could sleep next to you” he added, getting lost in his thoughts.

“That time’ll come too, but not now” he caressed his back again.

Dave nodded and gently put his head back onto Mart’s chest to deeply inhale his scent. He didn’t hear the door opening…

Martin closed his eyes too. Peace and contentment filled him and he let that happen for a little longer.

\---

A long black-haired woman walked through the opened door. She was adjusting her camera. She wanted to take a few shots from the empty studio, because she knew that by this time of hour usually no one used it. Then she glimpsed up. For a moment she couldn’t even comprehend what she saw. She froze in the middle of her movement and felt her jaw drop to the floor.

Dave felt the draught on his skin in his half-asleep state, but first he didn’t really know what its meaning was. But soon he knew. Martin felt too comfortable in this position to give it a thought. He was travelling in his own little world.

“Oh my… god” she moaned. She couldn’t say more in her shocked state. She was just standing there – her eyes popped out and her brain didn’t want to process what she saw. She started slightly shaking her head, but the move became stronger until she shook it hard in disbelief. She could only repeat to herself that this isn’t real, this isn’t happening. No!

First Martin didn’t even turn to her just squeezed his eyes shut then he sighed and opened them to look out the window. “Shit… this wasn’t the way you should have found this out…” he whispered quietly.

Dave – like someone dragged up by a string – sat up and stared at Anita in shock. She returned that shocked, angry and… disgusted look.

“Would you tell me what the hell were you doing here?!” she hissed.

“Well it was just… We just…” Dave cleared his throat embarrassed and glimpsed down on his mate, not knowing what to say.

Martin sat up slowly and turned his head to Anita. Meanwhile the singer already reached for his underpants and dragged them up. She watched his moves with a devastating look then she turned the power of her look towards Mart, waiting for his answer.

“We made love” he said the truth calmly, but his eyes glistened guiltily.

“Martin, maybe this isn’t the way you should…” Dave started quietly, but his voice failed him as he spotted Anita’s lethal look and he understood its message. He quickly collected his clothes and like a beaten-up dog sneaked out of the room. 

“Is it a big problem to you to give me some explanation?” she asked Mart. Her voice reflected the suppressed anger inside of her.

“Look…” Martin began after they were left alone. He slowly stood up to reach out for his boxers “I wanted to tell you… I just didn’t know how to do it… I didn’t know how you feel about such things…” he scratched the back of his head, perplexed.

“You wanted to tell… but you haven’t. And now I had to find out this way?!” she burst out at the end.

“Don’t be mad, please” he said with a guilty look on his face as she looked into the angry eyes “You know… Dave and I always had a special connection. Once we drank more than we should have and… well, we had sex… Then nothing had happened for long-long years, just suppressed longing. You know, I was always a freak and tried out many things. But this doesn’t mean that I don’t love you or anything like that.”

“But this… this… this…”

“Yes?” he looked at her patiently “You find it gross?” he asked quietly and sadness appeared in his voice.

“I don’t know. I find it strange. Shocking. I cannot understand! I can’t understand why you’re doing this!”

“Lust and love.”

“What kind of love?”

“It’d be hard to describe it” he mused and buckled his belt too.

“But what made you do this… with Dave?”

“Anita, I’ve been always like this. I’m bisexual, although this side of me isn’t that obvious. Dave… well, he has his effect not just on you. Why do you want him?”

Anita collected herself and her thoughts and mused on this question. This man was worth it to concentrate and try thinking with a cold head. “Because… because he’s incredibly hot in his own way, he has that something. It’s his presence. If he had a different body, I’d think the same of him.”

“See? You just gave the answer to your question. Because I’m open to this too, I feel the same.”

“But he’s… a man.”

“There are people who don’t see this as an objection.”

“And… he? Do you have other male lovers too?” she asked, but she shivered from the thought. She couldn’t bear that thought at all.

“No, no one else. It’s just us. And this was the first time since years that we slept together.”

“Well… it’s a bit… strange to me Mart. And then I put it mildly! The reason why I’m not yelling, crying or something like that is that I’m still shocked!”

“I understand” he nodded now fully dressed “It’s hard to accept this. I’d even understand if you found me gross after this and if you’d take the first cab to go home, leaving me. But I don’t want this at all, cuz… I love you.”

“No, Martin, this is a very bad and weak try just to keep your female lover” she narrowed her eyes a bit.

“You really think that I said it just because of this?” he looked at her seriously.

Anita felt unsure from this look. She couldn’t decide where to put it. Is Martin serious? Probably – she saw it in his eyes. But… he was with Dave… and was this really disturbing her or… was she just jealous? She shook her head. She still has to digest this, but another feeling rushed through her veins: she didn’t want to leave him! “Are you serious? Look me in the eye and tell me that way!”

“I’m deadly serious. I love you Anita and I don’t want to end our relationship because of this.”

It was still hard for her to believe this – and not because of Martin, but because of herself. It was so unbelievable. How was this possible? But this wasn’t the time she should think about this. “I don’t want to leave you either. But this… I don’t know how to react to this.”

“I understand. I know it’s not easy for you. But is this really that terrible?”

“Yes. No. I don’t know…”

“I see” he nodded “I guess you want to be alone now.”

“Yes, for a little while” Anita nodded and waited until Martin left the room. After a few minutes she followed him, but turned to the other direction. She wanted to talk to Dave to ask him these same questions. To make her decision, she had to know Dave’s side as well. She suspected where he was and when she stepped out on the roof, she wasn’t surprised that she found the nervously smoking man there.

“David…” she stepped next to him “Can we talk?”

“What do you want to know about it?” he asked, but didn’t look at her.

“Why?”

“This is a quite complicated question.”

“Would you try to tell me more about it, please?” she asked on a calm tone.

“Tell you why? I don’t know. He has such an effect on me like no one else. This formed from our friendship and in a strange twisted way I find this the most beautiful thing in my life. He means a lot to me and…” he turned around and looked at Anita “… I’m not willing to give up on him.”

“You love him?”

“It depends on how we look at it.”

“Why? How do you love him?”

“How do YOU love him?” he asked back.

“I love him with love” she said without hesitating and this surprised her a bit. Maybe she didn’t even realize yet that she was in love with Martin.

“I’m not in love with him. But I feel our relationship quite close. It’s definitely more than just friendship, but it’ll never be love.”

“I see. Do you want to take him away from me?”

“No. Anita, you have to count with my family too. I love them. And I really, really don’t want them to know about this. I want to raise my daughter in a normal family, if I had already failed with my son. So I ask you emphatically not to dare ruining this. I don’t want to take away Mart from you, but I need him too.”

“You know me like a woman, who’d ruin your family? Yes? It wasn’t my intention to put this out into the window at all, not for even a single moment. But I still have to process this” she said on a harder tone “You really shocked me and this’ll need some time to sink in” and without saying anything else she turned around and walked away. She wanted to be far from this place and the boys for a while to try and apprehend these things. The peers at the Hudson became a perfect place for this.

Dave gave out a deep sigh. He didn’t want to ruin neither his relationship with Mart, nor his family. They have to figure out something with his blonde mate.


	12. Chapter 12

12.

Martin was thinking a lot about what Anita could feel and think about these things. He was a bit afraid how she’ll decide, but he didn’t want to rush things. He was sitting in their hotel room for a few hours after meeting with Dave and talking over the things Anita had told them separately. Martin didn’t lie, he really felt that he loves her and it would have hurt him to lose her because of this. Although he wouldn’t die from it, it’d definitely hurt him for a while. But he found the relationship he had with Dave too valuable as well. He didn’t know whether he would’ve been able to give up on that if she wanted him to do so. Anyhow after a few hours he left the building to search for her. He suspected where she’d gone to. He walked along some streets and he found himself at the river bank. He walked across the small park and walkway towards the peers. He was right, she saw the girl sitting on a bench there. For a moment he hesitated then he walked to her and silently sat down next to her.

“Hi. Do I disturb you?” he asked quietly.

“Hi” she looked up “No.”

For a few minutes he just watched the ships on the river. “And what did you came up with? Or is it still soon to ask this?”

“I’ve been thinking a lot” she answered “And finally I have my decision.”

“Which is?” he turned to her.

“I… well it doesn’t disturb me. It was just… so… shocking to see it! You should’ve said it!” Anita looked at him.

“I didn’t know how you’d react. If you think deeper in it, it isn’t too easy to tell this. Just a few people can understand it. But… it really doesn’t disturb you? Don’t you find me or Dave gross because of this?”

“No, not at all” she smiled.

“I’m surprised now” he returned the smile and carefully grabbed Anita’s hand.

“Why?”

“I was afraid that… I don’t know. That it’ll end our relationship. I think I can imagine how much we’ve shocked you.”

“Very much. It was tough. I was angry, but after that I’ve realized that I don’t want to separate you and… and… that as a matter of fact…”

“As a matter of fact?”

“As a matter of fact… this… turns me on” she looked into the green eyes as she said this sentence.

Martin nearly swallowed in the wrong way from this as his eyes popped out and looked at her. He thought he heard it wrong, but her blushing was the proof that this sentence had really left her mouth. “Uhm… really? What… what do you mean?”

“What can I possible mean with this?” she smiled faintly.

“Uhm… what… does turn you on in it? The sight of two male bodies? Or… what?” he faltered out. Now he was the one who was embarrassed, which was a rare thing for him.

“It’s simply you. Other males doesn’t have this effect on me, because…” she mused for a moment “… because I don’t like men. Or at least most of them.”

“But you’re close to us enough that this can turn you on, am I right?”

“It seems so” she smiled again.

The blonde man sighed and felt that a big stone fell off of his chest “You have no idea how relieved I am now” he smiled from his heart.

“Why were you afraid, Martin? That maybe I tell it to the press? This possibility terrified Dave.”

“No. I was afraid of losing you.”

“This won’t happen from my own will” she nuzzled to him.

“It’s good to hear that” he was still smiling as he embraced her and gave a peck onto the top of her head.

\---

Dave woke up early that day too to hurry to the studio before the others could get there. He wanted to sing up some vocals alone. He didn’t want anybody around him right now and he didn’t like the studio that much anymore either. Somehow since that afternoon he disliked it, the building, the atmosphere so he just sang his parts and disappeared for the rest of the day. His keys rattled in the lock as he opened the door. As he walked in he opened the window to enjoy the cool morning air a bit. That couch was behind his back, but he didn’t even look at it. Finally he stood up and went to his mic, checking the lyrics. He knew that Andrew or Chris’ll arrive soon to record his vocals, so he started warming up his voice.

But the one who walked into the studio wasn’t the one he was waiting for. The blond man knew well that Dave started to come to the studio in the mornings, avoiding everyone. So he hasn’t seen him in the last few days at all. Everyone felt that something was wrong around the singer, but they didn’t say a word. It was his business and it’d happened earlier as well. But now Martin was fed up with this behavior. He felt the band was incomplete without Dave and it was palpable during working on the songs. He quietly walked in and looked into one of the soundproofed rooms. Through the window he could see Dave reading the lyrics.

The dark-haired man glimpsed up from the paper for a moment then he looked back down. His brain just processed the new information that he saw someone else than he expected. He looked back up at the blond man. Martin was just watching him, drinking in his sight and waited for him to come out from his cave. Dave knew that but he wasn’t sure whether he wanted to go and talk to him or not. Finally he decided that he can’t act this childlike and walked into the other room.

“Hi” the blonde musician said “For how long do you want to play hide-and-seek with me?”

“Why do you think that I’m hiding from you?” Dave asked back.

“Oh come on, Dave, don’t make me laugh! You come here every single morning to get over with your vocal parts like a little boy who knows that he did something wrong and cannot deal with the situation” he played with his sunglasses which were in his hands.

“Cool metaphor” he turned his back to Martin and walked to the window.

Martin didn’t answer just folded his arms and turned towards his friend.

Dave watched as people hurrying or walking on the streets. “What’s with Anita?” he asked.

“Everything’s fine with her” Mart smiled to himself.

Dave hemmed as an answer. He knew that he should say what bugs him, but how can he confess something like this? That since that afternoon he was simply afraid to face Anita or Martin? He didn’t know what they had been talking about, but he wasn’t entirely sure that he wanted to know that at all.

“David, I think it’s time for us to talk” Martin sighed.

Dave felt his muscles straining onto his bones from this sentence. He wasn’t ready to hear the worst, but maybe it’d be better to get over with it now, even if Martin tears a piece out of him with it. “Just tell me.”

“David, Anita is okay with it” he got to the point right away after a little thinking.

“What?” he turned around. The raw shock was visible on his face, because this wasn’t the answer he expected.

“It surprised me too, but you’ve heard it right” he nodded, still his arms still folded in front of his chest as he stood next to one of the laptops.

“Uhm…” Dave went silent to process this information. “But even after seeing us… you mean despite that too?”

“Yes, despite that too” he nodded again “Of course it shocked her, but… after she’d digested most parts of it, she said that it doesn’t disturb her and… it even turns her on… I mean just the two of us. She cannot imagine it with other men.”

“You have a strange girlfriend, Martin” Dave ‘grimaced’.

“Well… I hit the jackpot” he smiled “But you know what this means, don’t you?”

“What?” he asked back.

“Well…” his smile got wider and he shot a predator-like glimpse at him as he stepped to Dave and gently grabbed his nape to press a soft kiss onto his lips before looking into his eyes again “… you don’t have to fear that I’ll have to choose between you two.”

“You’d have chosen her anyway” Dave shrugged.

“Do you really have to ruin the moment?” Martin pulled away.

“No” he smiled, but he felt that he had to say this.

They were interrupted by Andrew’s arrival. “Hi guys! I thought I’ll find just Dave here” he greeted him with a handshake “Ready to work?”

“Before that I have to go and arrange some things” Martin shook his head “But from tomorrow on Dave’ll work with us again, am I right?” he smiled at the singer.

“Yes. I still have to close some things today, but after that I’ll be free again” the dark-haired man nodded.

“Great. Then now I go back to the hotel” Mart nodded contentedly.

Dave returned the gesture then walked back to his mic, waiting for Andrew to sit down on the other side of the glass and start the song, just to hear the usual “This was false, Dave. Try it again” comments.

\---

Meanwhile Mart went to buy some fresh pastries for breakfast then he went up to their hotel room with a smile on his face. His love was still peacefully sleeping on her tummy. He quickly walked to the kitchen area and put the pastries and two glasses of milk onto a tray, balancing and putting it onto one of the smaller tables. Then he quickly undressed and crawled next to his woman to give a soft kiss onto her back, trying to wake her up. He carefully pulled down the thin blanket from her body and went on with kissing her back. One of his hands slid onto her butt and in the next moment he reached between her legs from the back and started lazily stroking the delicate warm flesh.

After a few minutes Anita growled sleepily. Her mind came out very slowly from the relaxing sleep, but the gentle touches had a nice effect on her as well, so she didn’t really wanted to sink back into her dream. Martin went on with the slow wakening process and as a wave of desire rushed through his veins, he started gently biting her back, while his middle finger slid into her.

“Hmmmmmmmmmmm…” Anita moaned as she came round more and more.

Martin couldn’t take it anymore and turned her onto her back to give her a soft kiss on her lips then he quickly moved down to her breasts and started playing with them, but he couldn’t hold back for too long so his tongue and lips slid onto her revealed pussy. He started pampering it greedily.

“Good morning!” she moaned. She was still not fully awake but she was already lost in the feelings Martin evoked in her.

“Morning” he sighed and watched as another finger disappeared inside of her.

“Does this count as… a morning exercise?”

“We can say…” he murmured and after pulling his fingers out he positioned his hard cock to her entrance and with a swift move he pushed all the way up into her.

Anita screamed from the feeling then she embraced and pulled him closer to her. This way she was able to look with her lust-filled eyes into Mart’s green irises. He didn’t hesitate for too long – his hips moved forward roughly again and again, burying himself into the soft hotness over and over again as he was panting for air. Anita helped with her hips and feasted on her emotions like a hungry beast. A cloudy thought was born in her head: how was it possible for her to love a man this much? He panted louder and louder as he pushed her onto her tummy, pulled her hips up and slid into her wet core from behind, making him growl loudly. She moaned and moaned and when she felt him shoot his load into her, she screamed. She didn’t really notice as the wet hotness ran down between her thighs and onto the sheets.

The blonde man was slightly sweaty as he panted and gently collapsed on her. “I love you” he whispered barely audible and rolled down of her to sit up and wipe down the sweat from his forehead.

“It’s good to know” Anita smiled “Tell me, Mart… do you know anything about Dave? I haven’t seen him for days.”

“I spoke to him… this morning” he sighed and stood up to step to the table, pick up the tray and put it onto the creased linen.

“And?”

“I was right – he was avoiding us. He didn’t know what to think or do after that afternoon” he shrugged.

“But is he okay now? Did you talk to him?”

“Yes, I told him what you think about him and me and well… he was surprised. But I think he was happy about it.”

“Happy?” Anita looked at him.

“You know what I mean” he broke off a piece from his croissant.

“Yes I do” she smiled and started her breakfast as well.

\---

They finished the record soon. One or two weeks and after the end of the mixing it can step into the making stage too. Soon the first single will be released until the whole album launches. And of course the boys have to do a video to the new single as well. Meanwhile Anita had to leave them behind, because by the time they’ve got here, it was in the middle of September and she had to start her new semester. She didn’t want to leave the university – not even for Martin. This summer break was good to her – she took things and people more positively, although this would have been impossible for her a few months ago. Despite talking over things with Dave no threesome had happened since her birthday. Somewhere she was okay with that, cuz she still had to digest things. Those two months which she had to bear without the boys felt extremely long, but on the weekends she went to Mart or he came to visit her. Although New York was just an hour by car, they didn’t meet with Dave. And sadly the boys’ agenda became very busy. One photo shooting and interview came after the other and if they didn’t do these, they had to do a video or they had to arrange things around the tour. But now they had a nice 3-days-long weekend, which she’ll spend with Martin.

She had a call from Martin a few days ago and he said that he’ll be back at home in Santa Barbara on this long weekend, so this way she’ll be able to visit that nice place again. She had to leave her cat behind, because the too much travelling wouldn’t be good for her, but despite this no one asked her awkward questions. She avoided the danger the press could mean well, although people had noticed that she became more open, but they couldn’t figure out what’d happened to her. She kept her mouth shut. And finally the long-awaited moment has come: she was standing in front of the familiar gates. There was a well-known black car on the driveway, but an unfamiliar one was standing behind it as well. This meant that Martin wasn’t alone.

\--- 

She mused a bit as she picked up her bag after paying for the cab and she walked inside, cuz she new the code.

“Hello?!” she asked as she stepped inside the nice house and survived the dog’s “attack”, which meant drooling all over her hand and clothes. Because no one hurried to greet her, she quickly headed for the bathroom and washed her hands then she wandered in the house to search for Martin. Soon she methodically checked the rooms – from a few glimpses she realized that no one was on the ground floor. During her time as a waitress here she had mastered her skills in discovering the house in the most quickly way. She walked upstairs where she heard some familiar voices from the balcony. As she went closer she noticed the two sitting men talking and laughing with some glasses filled with whiskey in their hands.

She was a bit surprised when she recognized Dave’s voice and figure then she walked out to them with a smile on her face. She sneaked behind them and suddenly she put her arms around Mart’s neck as she leant forward.

“Well, hello there, boys! What’re you doing?”

Mart froze for a moment but then he smiled and gently stroked along Anita’s arm. “Hi. We were just chatting.”

“And drinking” Dave added.

“I see that. Do you have some for me too?” she smiled at them and pulled a chair next to Mart so she could sit close to him. Meanwhile Dave stood up and brought a glass for her too. This gave some time for her to kiss her love passionately. It has been so long…

“Here you are” Dave said as he returned.

“Thank you” she smiled at him “Dave, why are you here? It’s not that you disturb me or anything, it’s just that Mart didn’t mention it.”

“So you’re not happy to see me?” he turned sad.

“Which part didn’t you understand in ‘it’s not that you disturb me’, Davey?” she picked up her glass and drank half of its content.

“It means that I don’t disturb you. But it doesn’t mean that you’re happy to see me” Dave fussed with a smile on his lips.

She smiled then drank the rest of her drink as well then she leant onto the table and waved him closer. “Come here, I tell you something!” she smiled again and when Dave got close enough she pulled him to her by this nape for a hot kiss.

After they pulled back, Dave smiled darkly “It wasn’t bad.”

Anita just grinned and winked at him “I go crazy for you, Dave Gahan. Is it better now?”

“A little bit” his smile turned into a grin too. 

Mart just chuckled on them. “Well, honey, while you’re here, Dave’ll be our guest. I hope you have no objections.”

“Would it count if I had?” she mused and stood up to walk to the outside bar to make another drink for herself.

“If you had, it’d count” the blonde man turned after her.

Anita just smiled faintly on this and rather grabbed the whole whiskey bottle and put it down onto the table as she sat back into her chair. “You should cheer me up, boys, cuz the last two weeks were tough at the university.”

“This is why you need the whole bottle?” Dave asked and raised an eyebrow questioningly.

“It was a while ago since the last time I’ve got drunk. Is it a sin?” she poured for the boys too.

“Shouldn’t you do that on a party?” the dark-haired singer asked.

“Oh why should you have to be on a party to get drunk?” she drank out her glass again and her eyes watered up and she grimaced from the strong drink.

“Cuz of the mood?”

“That’s just a detail” she shrugged holding her glass and she started examining the garden.

“We’ll take you to an afterparty. Those can get pretty wild.”

“Great. But you can be wild without a party as well, can’t you?”

“What do you mean?” Mart asked.

“Who wants to lick whiskey from my tummy?” she asked not thinking too much or paying full attention on the boys’ reaction.

“You’re so… strange” Dave grimaced.

“And why is that?” she lifted an eyebrow.

“You’re stiff.”

“I bet you have such days too when you’re fed up with everything and you just want to forget, hm? You haven’t met this side of me yet, have you?” she sent him a small smile then drink the rest of her strong drink as well. She could already feel its effect in her head and she slowly started relaxing.

Dave had doubts in his eyes as he looked at his friend, who just shrugged.

“Sweetie, don’t you want to talk about it?”

“No, no. I’m fine, I’m just tired” she shook her head and poured another round. She didn’t want to tell them that she’d lost a job and she had very few money left for this month “You should rather tell me what’s with you? It was a while ago…”

“Nothing much personally” Dave shrugged “But the band’s life is busy. Soon the first single’ll come out.”

“Well, it’s good to hear that. Do you have a video yet?” she sipped a bit slower now.

“They’re cutting it” Martin nodded.

“Cool! Can I see it when it’s ready?”

“Of course” the blonde man smiled “Aren’t you hungry?”

“I’m not, thanks, but I go with you if you want to eat” Anita shrugged.

“But I’m starving” Dave sighed.

“Then come with me, you big cat” Mart chuckled then took Anita’s hand and led his guests downstairs into the kitchen.


	13. Chapter 13

13.

Dave was standing on the balcony and watched the descending Sun’s journey as it mixed the blue sky with blood-red and the deep color of wine, creating several shades of purple, red and warm orange. The round orb over the sea slowly ebbed away as its last, fading beams glistened playfully for the last time on the calm water’s mirror. This harmony was broken as a water animal exhaled some vapor into the air. 

He smiled, but his smile faded away quickly. Despite the beautiful landscape his thoughts were dark. It didn’t matter what Mart said in the studio, Dave couldn’t be 100% calm about it. He was here only because Martin invited him. Of course the singer was clear with it that Mart knew his thoughts. He knew it from his voice when he called him to come here. He could feel the warmth, the worry from it and that Mart knew what Dave felt. He knew what his blond friend wanted with these 3 days: to have a nice rest, to prove things and to let their senses flow… But he couldn’t ease up. Of course Martin did everything to help him and it was clear that Anita hasn’t noticed this grey saddening. He was grateful for his blonde friend that he tried to please him, but he tortured Dave with this too. He wanted to be with Mart so badly. He loves him… but Anita was here too and Dave knew that this cannot happen in the presence of the girl. Not yet. Maybe it’ll never happen. This made him somehow sad, but of course he couldn’t know this for sure.

When he looked towards the horizon again, he saw that the sea had already swallowed the sun to capture it for the night and the silver moon began her command over the sky with the help of the stars. But next morning the sun’ll break out and claim back the sky, wiping off the guards of the night. Yes, the warm colors gave their places to the shades of blue immediately. The purple melted into blue, the orange and red ran down from the canvas and now just the ethereal shades of blue existed.

He sighed and shivered a bit from the first cool breeze of the night, although the air was still warm. He hasn’t noticed that his blonde mate stepped behind him. He just felt the touch of the warm hand on his shoulder. As he felt the familiar scent, he had to shiver one more time.

“Don’t you want to come inside, my sweet?” he slid his hand around the singer’s waist as he whispered his question into his ear.

Dave looked at Mart with his slightly darker eyes “What’s going on inside?” he asked, waiting for him to turn him on. And he was too lazy to go inside, anyway.

“Anita is slightly drunk and is giggling on the music I put in. Of course she asked for our music after she didn’t like Johnny Cash that much” the blonde man smiled and stepped in front of Dave, looking into the dark eyes from very close.

“The sun just set” the singer stated simply.

“And how long do you want to wait before you kiss me?” Mart slid his hands onto Dave’s hips.

“Dunno… how much do I torture you with it?”

“Well, I’m quite awaiting it…” he slyly pressed himself against the singer’s groin, like a cheap slut.

Dave growled quietly then he couldn’t resist the green glimpse and went for his lips greedily. Martin slid his right hand onto Dave’s face as he tried to pick up his rhythm.

“And… how do you want to make me go inside with you?” Dave murmured on his deep voice right into Martin’s mouth.

“Maybe with this?” he started rubbing him through his trousers then kissed him again.

But after a few minutes something… or rather someone distracted them.

“Boys!” they heard Anita’s voice from the balcony’s door as she clung to the frame with one hand not to lose her balance, although she wasn’t that drunk yet. She saw that Dave immediately took a step away from Mart, as if he felt ashamed. Martin glimpsed at her too. Some of her clothes were already missing, so she was standing there just in a white wife-beater and black French panties. “Don’t you want to go on with this inside…?” she licked the edge of her lips and her eyes glistened naughtily as she watched the effect of her words.

The flash in Dave’s eyes was telltale as he sized up his prey. Anita gave them a seducing smile and started alluring them with her index-finger. Finally she turned around – giggling and rolling her hips – and disappeared in the house.

“See, my sweet? I’ve told you that she’s okay with it…” he kissed the vein on the singer’s neck that stuck out as he still watched the spot where Anita’d disappeared.

“She’s drunk” he stated the fact with a sigh.

Martin snorted “You think it’s just the booze talking from her?”

“She’s your chick, Mart.”

“She is… And do you know what did she pant into my ear lately while I was fucking her hard?”

“What?” he asked with a half-smile.

“That she wants to watch us someday…” he whispered into David’s ear on his most sultry voice.

“What?” he snorted in his surprise.

“You didn’t see this coming, huh?”

“No, I didn’t…” Dave mused. Opening up in front of Anita scared him a bit. He has a really special connection with Martin and usually he didn’t like to show it. But on the other hand… this turned him on too “I guess you’re in it.”

“Hmmm… you ask this exactly from a man, whom you always call a perverted old fag?” he grabbed Dave’s ass.

“I’m still waitiiiing!” they could hear the muffled yell from inside which was followed by a giggle from Anita as she hummed the song “Loverman”.

Dave sighed and looked at Martin “Come, don’t make her wait for too long, cuz at the end she’ll drown herself into alcohol.”

“Like I did several times” he nodded with a little smile on his face then he took his lover’s hand and pulled him inside. In front of the door he looked back at Dave. It was new for him to see the singer suddenly this shy and withdrawn…

He let Martin drag him inside and lead him to Anita. She was already sitting in a comfortable armchair – one leg was on the armrest as she moved it to the rhythm.

“Finally! I thought that you’ll stay outside forever” he giggled. It wasn’t a coincidence that she wasn’t on the bed – she thought forward and left it to the boys if they decided to leave her out from this round.

“What do you want?” Mart asked with a dark smile.

“For now I just want to watch you if it’s okay with you” she stroked along her own inner-thigh and knew that Mart’s gaze wandered down to her pussy, which was covered just by the fabric of her panties. But now she didn’t pay too much attention to this, she rather reached for her glass on the side-table and took a sip.

Dave hemmed as an answer. Somehow it felt difficult for him to make the first move so he rather just waited. The blonde man understood this and stepped to him. Anita could see them from the side as she was smiling behind her glass. Martin slowly stepped even closer and lifted his hand to softly caress Dave’s face, neck, shoulder, side and chest while he gently leant to him and started kissing him sensually. The well-known hot tingling spread in Dave. He often felt this dizzy when he was around Mart. But now he still could feel Anita’s presence. He forced himself to focus entirely on the blond man, the move of his tongue and touches.

Martin felt that Dave was tenser than usual and he soon realized he was like this because of her watching eyes. He was a bit surprised that the always purposive and stubborn side of Dave, which he showed to the outside world, was nowhere now. It was a long while ago since he met this side of him. Mart tried to help him, so he touched the front of Dave’s trousers before opening it. His hand disappeared in it to search for the familiar hotness there. He could hear one of those animal-like growls from Dave as he started losing his head, giving his body to his desires. Mart knew that he was doing it right, and as he glimpsed to the side, he saw Anita taking a sip from her whiskey when she heard Dave’s faint moan. His soft lips slid down to his lover’s neck and he started gently biting it while he played with him inside the trousers.

Dave’s body started to shake as he surrendered to his feelings and the burning desire he felt. His hands came alive and first he took Mart’s face into them to pull him close for a sensual long and hot kiss. While he savored Mart with his tongue, his hands took opposite directions from Mart’s nape. Anita sighed quietly from the sight and sipped another one from her glass. She felt that despite her expectations this little stalking made her hot. Meanwhile Martin pulled out his hand from the blue jeans and started unbuttoning Dave’s black shirt. The singer felt the touch of the air on his chest and as he pulled away from his blond mate the words just came out of him with a sigh: “Oh god, if you knew how much I wanted you…”

Martin moaned quietly from hearing this and Anita’s jaw dropped, but she quickly closed her mouth.

“I wanted you too…” he whispered back and licked along Dave’s collarbone.

“Then show me something from it” Dave moaned.

Martin just smiled and dragged down the jeans and underpants from Dave and slowly pushed him towards the bed. He made him sit down and he knelt between the singer’s legs on the floor. He started kissing his chest and flat tummy while his right hand slid onto the hard cock. Mart glimpsed to the side and saw that Anita’s hand had already disappeared under her wife-beater, caressing her tits while she drank the remains of her whiskey.

Dave’s long bony fingers got lost between his mate’s curls and he groaned from the gentle touches on his member. His nearly black eyes looked at Anita – searching for her reactions. She just let her head fall back to the headrest, because her right hand was deep under her panties then she bit down on her lip and looked straight into Dave’s lustful dark eyes. And this was the moment when Mart took the hard shaft into his mouth.

Dave moaned toward the ceiling from this and his fingers pulled hard on Mart’s hair. The blonde musician moaned as well, but he didn’t stop – he accelerated his speed, listening to Dave’s deep moans, which were soon accompanied by Anita’s quiet panting too. As he looked to the side, he saw that she was rubbing her clit faster and faster under the black panties. Mart groaned from the sight and when he turned back to Dave, he went on with sucking him even harder.

Dave had no strength to look over at Anita, because he watched the non-existent cracks on the ceiling again, but he didn’t really see anything. There was just Martin, his mouth and his amazing tongue. Martin concentrated on Dave again with closed eyes and gave in everything he could do to pamper him and ease up the inhibitions he had because of Anita’s presence.

Anita got lost in her thoughts and she stopped rubbing herself. She saw on Dave too that it was difficult for him to relax and be himself. She knew that he and Martin had a long history and that now she was the stranger among them. And she didn’t forget that there was a long break between the two men as well before finding each other again. She suspected that maybe it was too much for him that they have to be very careful not to let the family or the outside world knows about this – plus she was here too now and the guys had to warm up this part of their relationship as well… But she’ll do anything to help the dark-haired man not to feel ashamed and to be himself more easily. No matter what he’ll show to her, how he’ll act with her, she’ll be drawn to him and she’ll accept him. Just like she accepts Martin.

Meanwhile Martin licked along Dave’s throbbing cock again then he gently took the singer’s face between his hands. (It was clear that Dave already took a dive into the sea of pleasures again.) And Mart drew his attention on him – he straightened his back and pulled the other man down to him for some sweet kisses, but his right hand didn’t stop pleasing his lover. A muffled growl escaped Dave and he had to hold himself back not to jump on Martin right away. This way he could tease himself a bit more too.

The blonde man smiled into the kiss and slowly made Dave lay down on the bed “How do you want it?”

“Dunno… give me some pleasure” he answered with a pervert smile.

Martin smiled back. He saw that finally Dave started easing up “I thought so. I meant which role do you want this time? You want me to obey to your will, or you want me to ‘floor’ you, hm?” he caressed the slightly flushed face as he lay flat on top of the taut body.

“Floor me!” he panted hastily and imploringly. He remembered how that felt.

“As you wish…” Mart sighed and with a harsher kiss he pushed himself up “Turn to your side!” he asked while he reached for some lube on the night stand. He’d prepared himself for the weekend…

“As you command” he laughed quietly and obeyed to his mate. He was already shaking in anticipation.

Of course Martin arranged things in a way that Dave had to face Anita. This way she could benefit from the sight too. Mart saw how blushed she already was and he growled with approval seeing that the black panties were lying on the floor and she didn’t stop even for a moment exciting herself. He positioned himself behind Dave and grabbed the lube. When he got enough in his palm, he wet Dave. His fingers were playing evilly around the shaking Dave’s hole.

Meanwhile the singer examined Anita. She wasn’t ashamed to look straight into his eyes, while her fingers moved faster inside her body. No, she wasn’t that shy little girl anymore, whom Dave got to know. Mart noticed that Dave was watching her and saw that he liked the sight. Mart had to grin from this then he kissed and panted into Dave’s neck as he grabbed his rock-hard cock and positioned himself to the right spot. He slowly started penetrating him.

One of Dave’s hands grabbed the sheet, but he couldn’t let the sight of Anita go. He wanted to know what he can see in her eyes now that they became one with Martin. But there was no trace of disgust or embarrassment in her eyes as she bit down on her lower lip and moaned quietly, pushing two of her fingers into her again. She listened to Martin’s animal-like grunt as he got completely buried in the sweaty body with one push. Dave groaned loudly from Martin’s move and he closed his eyes to enjoy the feeling of the blonde man taking him again. “Kill me, please” he whispered with need in his voice.

“Are you sure?” he got the panting answer as his hips started to move backwards.

“Yes, yes… YES!!!” he shouted at the end.

Mart just grinned evilly then bit roughly into Dave’s shoulder as his hips moved forward mercilessly. He growled onto the singer’s shoulder from the feeling as the taut body wrapped around his throbbing member. Dave gave out a feral yell and he gave himself to the feeling completely. His hands fisted and turned white as he nearly tore apart Mart’s sheet. The blonde man watched his lover with a satisfied expression and he didn’t care about the sweat drops that slid down on his forehead and nose. With a sudden move he reached forward and grabbed Dave’s rock-hard cock while he glimpsed at Anita.

She whined with Dave from the sight. She was already sitting in her own little puddle. Her body was on fire from the lust.

“Come here…” Mart hissed for her and he didn’t care that Dave’s body tensed for a moment from hearing this. There was no need for him to repeat his request, she crawled to her love. “Dave, my dear… I want you to have double pleasure and I don’t want to leave out Anita either…” the blonde man said and his moves became softer a bit “Do you want her to lay down in front of you and slide onto your dick? Hm?” he licked along the sensitive and sweaty skin behind the singer’s ear.

“Yh-yeah…” he panted “Oh my god, I nearly came just from the way you said this!”

“This isn’t the end yet, my sweet, so hold yourself back as far as you can!” he grabbed Dave’s wet hair with one hand and pulled his head back “Did you understand?”

“Yes” he panted “I love it when you’re like this…”

“Why do you like it?” he whispered into his ear on a harsher tone, while he waved with his eyes to Anita to lie down and guide the singer into her.

“Cuz… cuz… you’re so commanding and this… turns me on… so badly! Do you feel it?” he addressed the last sentence more to Anita than Martin.

“Oh Jesus, yes! Finally!” she moaned as she could finally feel his hard shaft between her legs. She waited just for them to start moving again…

And Martin didn’t hesitate for too much – as he saw that everything was in its right place, he restarted his attack against the singer and now against her too. While she snapped at Dave’s mouth, one of her hands tugged up the white wife-beater that she forgot to take off. The singer didn’t need more: he bent down to the revealed breasts and started biting and sucking on them – and when Martin thrust rougher and rougher he bit harder and harder as well. She screamed from the pain and pleasure she felt as she dug into Dave’s hair, lifting one leg and putting it around Dave’s waist so he could slide deeper into her. She shivered when she felt Martin grab her knee and pull her onto Dave even more. The blond man grunted contentedly and went on with his rougher thrusts as he returned biting Dave’s shoulder hard.

The dark-haired man just moaned or drew blood from Anita’s breasts, as if it was some kind of fresh and raw meat. He wouldn’t have dreamed about enjoying this so much.

“Don’t you dare to cum yet, Dave!” Martin growled at him, pinching one of the singer’s small nipples hard.

Dave rattled in his pain, but he tried to hold himself back. Meanwhile Anita moaned under Dave wildly as well. Martin – in his kinkiness – enjoyed seeing Dave suffer a bit. Well, he was the one who asked him to kill him and he knew that acting like this he can always succeed. He saw that Anita wasn’t far and knew that that’ll be too much for the singer… “You’ll cum when you’ll feel Anita’s muscles dance on you… no sooner, no later!” he grabbed Dave’s jaw to turn him half-way towards him and look into the hazy eyes.

Dave got and managed to understand Martin’s sentence then he fell back into his delirium. But no, he cannot cum yet, cuz Martin ordered him not to. Yes, he ordered. And he loved when he gave him orders. When he does that he feels like an animal restricted by chains, who wants to get free.

Martin spanked Anita’s thigh while he gave them another rough thrust. He knew that she loved when he spanked and grabbed her ass during sex. He saw that this was the only thing she needed to reach her overwhelming orgasm and he wanted to see Dave come as well. The singer wouldn’t have been able not to cum into her from this anyway. He threw his head back and yowled loudly, like the wolf of the darkest night.

“That’s it!” Mart sighed as Dave’s body arched and Anita’s did the same towards the opposite direction. For a moment Martin was mesmerized from the beautiful sight then he grabbed Dave’s hips to pull him back a bit. This way he slid out of Anita. In the next moment he slid out of him too and pushed him onto his tummy just to drag him up onto his knees right away. He felt Dave’s whole body shaking and he penetrated him roughly again, starting a wild and quick pace right away. Now he had to gasp for air as well. Finally he could focus only on his pleasure. Dave barely realized what was happening and he was surprised when he felt Martin inside of him again, but he didn’t mind it at all. He moaned and sighed contentedly again and again, as the blonde man attacked his body rougher and rougher. Then suddenly it was over as Martin’s body strained without a noise – his veins sticking out on his neck. He gave a few more thrust to the kneeling man in front of him to shoot the last drops into him as well.

But Dave wasn’t quiet: his yell filled the room – and even the neighborhood. Martin felt satisfied as he listened to the loud cry and finally he moaned too, letting out the air stuck inside of him. He stroked Dave’s nice butt and slowly slid out of him. The singer collapsed onto the bed and panted like a big cat. For a moment Martin watched him with a little smile then he turned to Anita, checking whether he can see something negative on her face. But beside tiredness there was nothing else on her face. She wasn’t really able to say a word – partly because of her enormous climax and partly because she was nearly marveling the relationship between the two men. As Dave – who could be so confident and purposeful on the outside – subordinated himself to Martin, who – despite his withdrawn nature – could completely control his lover…

Martin was a bit relieved as he leant over to Anita and kissed her lips then he propped himself over Dave and leant down to his face. “Well, did I manage to murder you, my sweet?” he brushed out a wet strand of hair from his sweaty forehead.

“Quite well” he smiled and nuzzled closer to Mart.

“See? I’ve told you that you don’t have to be afraid of Anita…” he ran his index-finger along the badly-looking bite on Dave’s shoulder and he couldn’t stop himself from digging his finger into it a bit.

Dave just looked up at his mate with a dark look “Yes, you were right. But despite this at the beginning… it felt strange. Don’t tell me that it was so easy for you to share one of our biggest secrets with someone…”

“No, I wouldn’t say that…” he gave him a lopsided smile as he let his fingers interweave with Anita’s over Dave. “Did you enjoy it, sweetheart?” he asked again from the panting woman.

“I cannot describe how much!” she panted “You two are incredible!”

“I’m happy to hear that and I’m glad everything’s clear now for everyone” Mart sighed contentedly and exhaustedly. He could get quite tired if he has to concentrate on an act this much – especially when there are more participants. He stripped off his previously superior and dominant self and nuzzled to the singer – who meanwhile turned on his back between them – like a sleepy little boy. 

Dave smiled then mused on the situation as he stared at the ceiling. They’ve stepped through another line today.


	14. Chapter 14

14.

A few days later Dave was walking in Martin’s garden, deep in thoughts. Time after time he needed to march off like this to clear and make his thoughts simpler and put things to their right places. Usually his lyrics and music came in this state as well. Now he was thinking about the situation and the last few days. They barely slept – they loved, enjoyed and exploited this kind of freedom this much. He felt a bit exhausted, as if he was in his twenties after a party with his friends. It was a bit strange to feel like this now that he was closer to his fifties, but he didn’t mind. As he noticed Martin and Anita felt the same.

Sometimes at night when they let each other alone, he heard Mart and Anita enjoying each other’s company. It didn’t disturb him, but on these occasions Jennifer and his kids came into his mind and with this his worries arrived too. Of course he was here with a cover story – he came here because of some work, or at least his wife knew this way – but Dave’s inner fears were focused now on the problem what’ll happen if this turns out. He wouldn’t be able to bear it. He’d realized a long time ago that in that case everything’d be over: the band, his marriage, friendships… Was it worth it? Well, it didn’t really matter anymore. The secret that can turn out was already there. The scandal is prepared and they have to be very careful not to let it explode. And this whole thing just grows.

These thoughts weren’t on his mind all the time, but when they were then they made him really worried. But what could he do against it? There aren’t any safety regulations he could follow and avoid the exposure of this. They have to pay attention on the lies, the places where they meet and on the dates. This is all he can do. He hated lying to his wife. He didn’t think that his relationship with Martin was cheating – it was more like a supplement, because a woman cannot give him the thing a man can. And no other man can give him something like Martin. But now Anita was in the picture too and lately he has been in her quite often… and this… this is cheating. He trusted his wife and she trusted him, but there wasn’t anything else as a proof of their faithfulness. Knowing that he’s cheating on Jen was awful, but still it made him think. He does this so there’s something wrong in that marriage as well. And so far none of his marriages worked. Somehow he’s not the type who can live in harmony.

He had to smile bitterly from this. Living in harmony… what does that mean? Is he happy? Yes, he is. But in what kind of relationship? In a love-triangle where everyone has sex with everyone, no matter if it’s a man or a woman. It’s a quite grotesque picture. A normal life, a normal family isn’t able to make him happy? He loves his kids and he’s quite sure that he’s a good father – if we don’t count Jack’s childhood. Those times weren’t easy and he charged it on the fame and his own weakness. But… is something wrong with him because in normal situations he feels himself as if he was playing a role? Did something go wrong in him thanks to his past? Or he had been damned from the moment of his birth? He became successful, but his life seems still desolate. Sometimes he just wishes he could only be a regular guy with a regular life in a simple American house with a dog, a cat, kid and wife. Or maybe it was a mistake to leave England. But he cannot change his past and maybe he doesn’t even want to do that, no matter how hard he tries to find the reason why he became like this, why he had the relationships he had and why he enjoys this kind of sex. He sighed and got lost in his thoughts again. He stared at a point between the flowers with his glassy eyes and he just listened to his inner voices.

\---

Martin was standing on the balcony with his arms folded in front of his chest and watched the thinking singer unnoticed. He just got out of bed and his messy blonde hair just proved this. He was holding a cigarette between his fingers while his steaming cup of coffee was on the banister.

“Good morning” suddenly he heard Anita’s still sleepy voice and felt the familiar hands sneaking around his waist “What’re you looking at?”

“Morning. It’s Dave” he turned back to the singer after a kiss.

“What’s wrong?” she frowned, because she knew Martin well enough to know when something bothered or made him think.

“Something bothers him… He’s very lost in his thoughts…” he narrowed his eyes as he watched Dave’s sunken shoulders.

“How do you know this?”

“You know, I know him more than anyone” he shrugged and sipped from his coffee “I had nearly 30 years to figure him and his body language out and even from his slightest move I can guess what’s on his mind or what he wants.”

“What can bother him?” she looked at the restless singer worried too “Do you… do you think that this situation?”

“You learn fast, although it wasn’t too difficult to figure this out” he embraced her waist with one hand and pulled her closer.

“Well yes, you don’t have to be a genius” she laughed and from this the man in the garden looked up at them.

Martin was curious how Dave could see them up there, what could cross his mind seeing them like this as he rested his arm around Anita and they both looked down at him. Dave looked aside and went into the house.

“It seems that he doesn’t want to share his thoughts with us” Anita noted “Is he always so reserved?”

“No, not always, although he opens up more on stage and in front of us. He’s distant with other people. He’s seen and lived through too many things. He gave to them more than enough from himself. I think, if he didn’t hold himself back on the tours, when we’re always in a hurry and we meet many strange people, he’d feel that they’d tear him apart until there was nothing left from him… I know this feeling…”

Anita just looked up at her love without a word. To tell the truth, it never crossed her mind yet how hard it can be to be famous. She always saw just the good side of things.

“Hey, don’t worry. We’ve got used to it. Sometimes it’s easier, sometimes it’s harder to live with this. If I can do, I don’t give it too much thoughts. Aren’t you hungry? Come, let’s have something for breakfast!” he stroked her upper-arm and gave a kiss onto her forehead.

She just smiled and followed Martin. Although she was worried about Dave, she suspected that Martin’ll help on him, because he knew him better.

\---

The blonde host – after the three of them had breakfast together – asked Anita to leave him alone with the other man for a while. He wanted to talk to him, because he saw that Dave wasn’t in a great mood. He saw the confusion on his face and Mart didn’t want to let the singer’s dark thoughts flood his mind too much. He had to search for him for a while. His friend hand great skills in disappearing without a clue – just like a cunning cat. Finally he found him on the smaller terrace next to his studio. Dave was sitting in one of the comfy chairs, smoking.

“Do you mind if I join you?” Mart stepped out from the dim house.

Dave looked at him “No” he smiled faintly.

Martin got comfortable in the chair next to him and examined his mate’s face. He did this countless times during the long, long years.

“What?” the examined one asked. He knew Mart’s deep looks too well.

“Something bothers you.”

Dave sighed “We’re on an unknown field now… Doesn’t it worry you?”

“What do you mean exactly?” he frowned.

“Well… you know, until I was only with you, I didn’t feel that I was undermining my family, but now that Anita got into the picture too… And anyway what kind of a man goes into such a relationship, with a family? There’s something wrong with me… And what if it turns out? How can we protect our beloved ones, the band and each other from the world?” he looked careworn at the blond man.

Martin sighed deeply. He gave some thoughts to this too, although he tried to put it aside and live just for the pleasures. “I don’t know, David. There’s no guarantee that it won’t get out. This is why we are this careful. Does it bother you that we showed this side of our relationship to Anita?”

“No. It’s just still odd. And I’m quite concerned that something’ll go wrong. Three people are more than two so the risk is bigger too.”

“You’re right about this. Sometimes it comes into my mind what if my relationship didn’t work anymore with her… what’d she do… would she keep our secret or would she run to the first paper?” he mused staring into nothing.

“She is better than that, Mart.”

“Yeah, I know” he shook his head “But you know me, you know what a chaos I have inside my head” he shrugged.

“Well yeah. We aren’t easy personalities, me thinks” he mused too “Do you think we are normal? I mean… isn’t there some kind of a tendency in us?”

“Being normal is relative. If you mean that we don’t live up in some questions to the expectations of society then we aren’t normal. But I don’t mind, I’ve been always like this. There was a time when I wanted to live up to them at any costs and when I failed, when I couldn’t process a lot of things, I’ve started drinking heavily. But I’ve changed in this. But I’m still drawn to some things. Yes, we can say that I have a tendency to certain things. Maybe you too” he looked at his mate again.

As an answer Dave nodded “It’s still strange. But I enjoy it way too much than to get out of it, so as I know myself, I’ll stay until the very end. And let’s hope that nothing will come up” he smiled.

“I hope so too, Dave. You know, I like pleasures too much to stop. I love you both and I don’t want this relationship to change. I wouldn’t be able – or just with great difficulties – to choose from you.”

“It’s good to hear this” he laughed.

“In the ‘Jen-question’ I cannot give you and answer. You have to deal with that alone. I count as cheating too, don’t forget that, even if I’m not a woman.”

“I’m concerned more cuz of the kids. They wouldn’t be able to get over it, ever.”

“Over what? That you cheated on their mom or that you cheated on her with me?”

“With you and Anita. It must be horrible to realize that their father cheated on their mom with a woman AND a man. Especially with a man who is close to them and love him as a friend.”

“Well, yeah. You’re right. Cuz it’d be a shock to my own children as well… But let’s don’t talk of the devil, cuz he never sleeps, you know it well…”

“I agree” Dave stretched. He felt a bit better. “And now?”

“Dunno. What do you want to do?”

“I hoped that you have some ideas, but I like the idea of searching for Anita” and his lips curved up into a kinky smile.

“Oh you little pervert…” Mart laughed as he stood up “You can’t get enough of pleasures, can you?”

“Do you know me like that?”

“Well, not exactly… Come then!” he grabbed Dave’s butt “Let’s chase our little girl…”

\---

The long weekend extended nearly to a week before Anita said goodbye first to Dave, who got home a few days earlier, then to her love. She was happy about those two days at the end of their little fling which she could spend with Mart. A lot of things have happened and she wanted to process them in a little calmer environment. She could see into the two men’s special and deep relationship. It wasn’t that burning-kind-of-love, she could see it. It was more about deep love, lust, fallibility and no matter how strange in can sound, but about respect as well. Now she saw the bigger picture – she had an affair with two music icons… Yes it was still a bit odd for her, but she tried her best to get used to the thought. She wouldn’t have thought that Dave’ll be able to open up this much in her presence, but it seemed that the singer has accepted her and later he was the one who wanted more and more rounds. Sometimes he seemed insatiable, but Anita didn’t mind. She liked being with him too, although until now Martin was always there, watching them or joining the game.

She sighed as she put her hairbrush down and checked her waitress outfit once again in the mirror. Today she has to work on an event again. She was satisfied to see that she’d lost some weight lately – thanks to the intensive exercises in bed and to the hard work. She quickly made a simple ponytail and was already on her way to work her ass off.

Although a few weeks have already passed since the sweet days by Martin, a few times she met her love. Yes, now she considered him her love. She was finally able to believe that they were together and she was happy that they could go on well, although it was still a bit hard to reconcile their lives. But Anita didn’t care about this that much, because she thought that the circumstances didn’t matter until they could meet.

She took a cab now, because she still had some money from her previous jobs, and excited it in front of the elegant building. Upstairs on the who-knows-which-floor she took her place and listened to their boss.

In his black suit Dave watched the crowd calmly. There was Jen by his side in a gold dress and was talking enthusiastically to their friends. He watched his wife with a musing look. He loved the way she gesticulated and as he watched her explaining her point of view a broad smile appeared on his face. He rested one of his hands at the small of her back.

Anita was very busy, but lately she liked it this way, cuz it meant that time was passing by quicker and she didn’t get bored in the colorful crowd as she passed the rich guests. She’d noticed that since she’s been together with Mart, she became a lot more open to people and somewhere she felt glad about this. This way she didn’t have to suspect the worst from everyone.

After she reloaded her tray and returned the short smile she got from an older couple for the served drinks, her eyes got stuck on someone standing between two columns. She recognized the slim black figure right away and she suspected that it was Dave’s wife on his side. A little thorn pricked into her heart as she sized up the slim and perfectly looking woman. She could never compete with such women. As her gaze jumped from Dave’s embracing arm up to his face, her uneasy feeling got stronger, because she saw the love in his expression and from this those nights came into her mind which the three of them have spent together. Suddenly she felt herself like a cheap slut, who couldn’t fit in any way into the relationship she was watching. She rather quickly turned away and tried to stop this strange feeling. It wasn’t jealousy. Maybe she wouldn’t be able to describe it even to herself what it was, but she knew that it was an uneasy and lousy feeling.

Dave was still in his calm observing role as he was listening to the conversation next to him, but slowly a thought came into his mind. He should drink something. He turned around to search for a waiter nearby so his eyes met Anita’s. His eyes didn’t reflect anything, although he was a bit surprised that they are in the same place this evening – especially when Jen’s right next to him. He rested his eyes a bit longer than usual on Anita’s face, examining it and he saw that sad expression she had.

She hesitated for a few moments. She tried to force a neutral expression on her face and decide what Dave wanted. Should she go there and offer some drinks or would it be better for her to avoid every little risk and ditch him and his wife during the evening? She stood there motionlessly, waiting for her answer from Dave’s look. He nodded barely noticeable. Anita was a bit unsure on her way to them as she concentrated hard not to look into his eyes. She rather tried to concentrate on balancing the glasses and clear her mind.

“Champagne?” she asked on a neutral tone as she approached the chatting group, where Dave watched the happenings from the side.

“Oh yes, thank you!” Jen laughed and nuzzled to her husband “And you, hon?”

“Well, I don’t know… maybe one” he looked at Anita, took off the glass from the tray and sipped.

Anita noticed that the singer watched her from behind his glass, but she didn’t care about it. She wanted to disappear from his near as soon as possible. She didn’t want to risk her guilty thoughts to show up on her face. If she imagined that Jen gets to know about what her husband did to her several times, she was sure she wouldn’t be so happy to accept her drink.

“Can I bring you something else?” she asked for the last time, but she suspected that she’ll get a ‘no’ as an answer, giving her the opportunity to finally disappear. And as she expected, she got a nice ‘no’ from Jen, but before that she asked a question from Anita, which proved her point on her side of the conversation then she let Anita go.

Anita sighed nearly with relief when she could finally leave them behind to serve the rest of the drinks from her tray. She hated such awkward situations, but she could thank this one only to herself. She tried to close out Dave’s presence as best she could and concentrate only on her job. After about ten minutes she could finally rest a bit, which she did in a hidden corner of one of the balconies. She hoped that the little cooler air will clear her mind a bit. She didn’t understand why seeing Dave with his wife mixed her up this much. Maybe she realized just now that what they were doing is wrong? And even if she knows this, lust doesn’t care. And her lust wanted Dave. As she closed her eyes she could see him in his adored black suit, she could see that sly glimpse which he gave her from behind his glass.

“I’m going insane…” she murmured under her nose.

A shadow fell upon her and a familiar scent hit her nose, which was soon accompanied by a well-known voice “You have a break?”

“Dave? Uhm… yes, but maybe it’d be better for me to go back.”

“No, no, stay” he pressed his victim gently against the wall “I don’t know whether anyone has told you…” he leant to her neck “but you’re fucking hot in this waitress outfit.”

“What the hell are you doing, Dave?” she hissed quietly and looked around with worry in her eyes.

“Are you at a loss?” he gave her a melting smile.

“We can put it that way” and she tried to push him away.

“And what’d you say to the idea of giving me some time tonight after this whole party thing is over?”

“What are you talking about?” she looked at him shocked, forgetting that she was about to push the singer away.

“Dear Anita, I mean that after this party is over I’d love to fuck you” Dave whispered on a pervert tone.

“Alright, alright, just let me go! Anyone can see us” she whispered quickly, but she couldn’t deny that her heart sped up from Dave’s sentence – especially because she sized up him in his black suit once more. It was like a second skin for him.

“I don’t think you were this worried about it when you had sex with Martin in that restroom.”

“That was something else, because he has no…. Hey! Did that bastard tell you?” she stopped, but next to the ‘shock’ there was a little smile on her lips too.

“You know we share everything with each other. And the fact that my wife is here… isn’t it a turn-on for you? Honestly” he asked while he gently pulled her closer by her waist.

“Not at all! It rather concerns me!” she protested, resting her hands on his chest, but as Dave’s scent reached her nose again, she felt her whole body shaking and her nipples hardening under her shirt.

“You shouldn’t worry this much. On these kinds of parties Jen is totally charmed – she doesn’t see or hear.”

“Really?” she whispered a bit dazedly from his closeness.

“Really” Dave leant closer again.

“Do you want me?” she glimpsed up into the darkly glistening eyes from Dave’s inviting lips.

“Don’t you feel it?” he pressed her against his body.

“Oh my god!” she moaned when she felt that certain pressure.

“Yes?” he pressed his groin even more to hers then leant to her ear “I’d do such dirty things to you… I’d tie you to the bed and pamper you… I’d tear up your body and you’d bleed from several wounds and I’d lick down your blood then I’d fuck you until you scream for me to stop…” he whispered on a lower tone.

“Jeez, Dave, you know how to turn me on…” Anita swallowed hard as she enjoyed his hot breath by her ear.

“You think so?” he laughed quietly then licked along her neck.

“Do you want to come back for me or should I give you my address?” she moaned faintly while her hand slid onto the front of the black trousers.

“Give me your address. At least this way I’ll be able to visit you more often” he murmured and his right hand was already under Anita’s skirt.

“You should rather memorize it, we shouldn’t leave any clues” she said then leant to Dave’s ear and whispered the right address into it. Then she quickly freed herself from his embrace and without looking back she left him there. She was afraid that in case she looked back, she would have run back to him and end up in his neck. She already had difficulties with not letting herself blush – especially when she thought about the things that were still waiting for her that night. This’ll be the first night when Dave’ll make her his own alone. This’ll be the first time when there’ll be just the two of them and this scared and turned her on in the same time. She hoped that he’ll give her a start so that after arriving home she can take a shower and tidy up her small place a bit.


	15. Chapter 15

15\. 

Dave walked back into the room as well and during the rest of the night – when no one looked – he gave several dirty looks to Anita.

The rest of the evening was pure suffering for her as she had to tackle with Dave’s hot looks – and they just turned her on even more. By the time she finished the job, even her toes wanted Dave. She wanted, she wanted to… She rather shook her head and hurried home. She quickly nodded - luckily Dave wasn’t there yet, so she quickly cleaned up her place a bit, undressed, and stepped under the shower to wash down the job’s dirt from her body.

Dave didn’t want to hurry. He was practical – he took Jen back to the hotel, they chatted about the evening then Dave said that someone called with business issues and that he’ll be back soon. So after a few minutes he already knocked on Anita’s door in the very same black outfit he has been wearing during that night.

Anita knew who it was so she didn’t think too much how to dress up. Her body was still wet from the shower and her hair got wavy from the water. She had just a white towel around her body as she walked to the door and after checking if the visitor was really whom she expected, she opened the door, grabbed his suit and pulled him inside by it, pressing her hungry lips on his.

“Are you this hungry?” Dave asked when he could breathe again, but he already pulled down her towel.

“What do you think?” she grabbed one of his hands and led it on her already wet and hot pussy.

Dave just growled and two of his fingers penetrated her right away.

“Fuck me Dave! I beg you! Fuck me!” she moaned as she grabbed Dave’s shoulder with one hand, picking up the rhythm of the long fingers, while her free hand tried to unbutton his suit.

“I will, hon, you can be sure about that! Your little blonde prince won’t even recognize you!” Dave answered then pushed her down on a nearby table. He turned her around and went on with exciting her while he started biting her shoulder.

“Oh yes, geez! That’s it! Give me more!” she whined and opened her legs even wider for him. She wanted him so badly!

“You’ll get it, you’ll get it” Dave moaned while he quickly got rid off his jacket, pants and underpants. Finally he turned her around again and gave his rock-hard cock into her hand “You want this?”

“Yes!!!” she moaned and fell onto her knees without asking. She greedily put her lips around his hardness. She went insane from its taste…

Dave’s long fingers were already pulling on the girl’s hair and he pushed her head on his shaft with a little more power, forcing her to swallow him deeper. Anita was working on the venous member eagerly. She glimpsed up time after time, because she loved watching the pleasure on Dave’s face and his quiet pants and moans made her just even wetter. He enjoyed the situation until he could bear it anymore and he dragged her up from the floor, pushed her violently against the table and with a quick and swift move he was already inside of her. He could feel that she wasn’t fully prepared for this yet – her grip on him was so fucking tight that he had to groan. Anita screamed from the pain and pleasure as she held on to the edge of the table. She loved when someone fucked her from behind.

“How do you want it, bitch?”

“In the first round… fuck me from behind and grab me! The way… ah… I love it…” she moaned after a stronger thrust.

“As you wish” Dave answered and started fucking her with feral lust. He reached forward to play with her breasts too while his teeth were tearing the skin along her spine.

She couldn’t stop moaning and screaming as the sharp teeth broke her skin while the rock-hard cock was sliding in and out of her unstoppable. “More! Harder!” she screamed totally lost in her pleasures.

“As you wish” he repeated and the quick, harder pace came with it too. The table was moving forward slowly from the mind-blowing tempo.

Anita wouldn’t have been able to name the sounds that left her throat. She felt that the bites on her back were burning from the water and sweat, but she didn’t care. “My clit!!!” she threw her head back and moaned from the depths of her throat as she felt her orgasm build up quickly. And Dave fulfilled her wish, letting her come. Her whole body tensed from her orgasm which shot through her. Her inner-muscles started a wild dance on Dave’s cock.

But he stopped himself and didn’t come yet. He slid out of her, picked up his tie and dragged her with him to the bedroom. When they got there he pushed her down on the bed.

“Do you have razorblades?” he asked.

“Why?” she asked still a bit confused from her previous climax.

“What’d you say to some nice lines?” he smiled darkly.

“You want to cut me?” she looked up at him a bit unsure while Dave tied her up in a professional and proficient way. She tried her wrists but she couldn’t move an inch.

“Oh yes. I want your blood.”

“They’re next to the washbasin, in the top case of the commode. But… don’t cut too deep, I don’t want permanent scars” she swallowed hard.

“I’ll try my best” then he walked into the given direction just to come back with the item he was looking for. He crawled over her and whispered into her mouth “Are you ready?”

“I’m not sure…”

“If you don’t want it, just tell me” Dave said and honest worry glistened in his eyes.

Anita took a deep breath and looked deep into his eyes. It’s just a question of trust. Does she trust Dave enough to take this step with him? As she watched the dark glistening eyes and discovered the worry in them she calmed down a bit and finally she nodded.

But Dave put the blade aside. He knew that it’d be too soon yet to start it – and quite painful too. He rather started gently stroking and kissing Anita’s body wherever he could reach her. She appreciated his efforts. She knew that he put the razorblade aside to prepare her for the next minutes and with a sigh she slowly let her worries go and let her senses to be filled with the awakening desires in her body. Dave played gently with one of her nipples and his long fingers found their way back between her thighs. They got slowly closer and closer to their goal, stroking her sensitive skin. She opened her legs wider without noticing it and she moaned at the ceiling from the soft bites on her nipple. She started to want him badly again. His fingers finally reached their goal and they slowly completely disappeared in her wet channel. First they moved gently then he accelerated the pace. Anita moved her hips to the rhythm of Dave’s fingers as she sank deeper and deeper into her pleasures. He pampered her further – getting fiercer and fiercer. He knew that she was already somewhere else as she panted and moaned loudly, sometimes breathing his name. With his free hand he reached for the razorblade and drew a long line on one of her breasts.

She moaned in surprise, but her moan was lustful from the pain then she felt Dave’s soft tongue lick sensuously along the wound. Her knees went weak as she lifted her head, bit her lower-lip and watched him doing so. He leant to the soft lips and pressed a kiss on them while he cut again and again. She moaned or sighed into Dave’s bloody mouth with every cut. She got turned on more and more from this little game. She felt that her own wetness made the sheet under her wet.

Dave lost control from the smell and taste of blood. He slowly cut deeper into her soft tummy and drank her blood like a drunken werewolf, while his fingers didn’t stop moving either.

“I want your dick!” she moaned as her eyes rolled back into her head, enjoying this dirty sex with her lover more and more.

“You’ll get it” Dave rattled and rammed into her right away. He was bathing in his pleasures, his arms were shaking from his own weight, his back strained from the strong moves and his muscles danced under his tattooed skin as the sweat drops started their way downwards on the surface, obeying to the force of gravity. Loud, deep moans filled the room as Dave’s strong voice broke out from his lungs.

“Cut me… more!” she screamed and didn’t care that her chest, tummy and thighs started to bleed from more and more cuts. She went crazy from the pain and pleasure, which she’s never felt together on this level.

“As you command” Dave panted and grabbed the blade again, giving her a few more long and deep cuts then he smeared the blood on her skin.

Anita’s muscles tensed from every cut and she gasped for air. She barely felt that at some places the blade went deeper a bit, because she felt that her orgasm was building up quickly, thanks to Dave’s unstoppable thrusts. “Lick it! Lick it, if you wanted my blood!” she moaned when Dave cut the inside of her upper-arm and she saw that her blood started to ooze from the small wound.

Dave went for the fresh blood like a hungry beast goes for fresh meat. He couldn’t get enough from the red liquid, from Anita’s sweet blood. He didn’t let a single drop go to waste, he was very profound.

“I’m nearly… oh my god… I’m nearly!” she panted getting closer and closer. Dave’s tie dug into her wrists painfully, her whole body was shaking and she felt her inner-muscles coming alive. In the next moment her whole body jerked, which caused Dave’s blade go deeper into her outer-thigh once more and she yelled his name loudly into the stuffy silence of the flat.

Soon Dave followed her with an unarticulated feral growl then his muscles relaxed and his arms gave out. He rolled off of her and nuzzled close to her, panting hard. His lover had difficulties with finding her way back from the world of pleasures too, but she didn’t mind it at all. She panted unstoppable towards the ceiling, her eyes still closed, her body shaking like a leaf.

Dave’s breathing got back to normal after a while and he slowly embraced and pulled her closer. “So how was it?” he whispered his question into her ears.

“Amazing…” she swallowed hard, because her throat felt dry from all the panting “But maybe you could untie me, cuz I can barely feel my arms…” she closed her eyes.

“Oh, sorry!” and he quickly and very carefully loosened his tie then he gently rubbed her arms to relax the muscles.

His lover wasn’t able to move an inch. Her whole body hurt. Dave really finished her off. Her wounds hurt, but she wasn’t able to move – not even her little finger. She slowly opened her eyes and turned her slightly paler face to Dave “You killed me.”

“Good. I wouldn’t give you less than a first quality fuck” he grinned widely “But will you be okay? I have to go back soon, but if you cannot move, I can give a call to Martin.”

“You don’t have to” she shook her head slightly. To tell the truth she wasn’t sure about how Mart’d react from the sight of her hacked body. She hoped that they won’t meet until her wounds’ll heal completely. She thought that these wounds are just hers and Dave’s. She wasn’t in the mood to explain this to the blonde musician. “I’ll gather some strength soon and bring some disinfectant and water to clear them” she sighed.

“Leave it, I’ll bring them” Dave said and got up to return with the items and carefully take care of her cuts. When he was ready, he gently kissed Anita one more time. “I have to go back” he said quietly and slowly dressed up.

Anita just gave him a tired nod then a little smile appeared on her swollen lips “Dave!”

“Yes?” he looked up.

“You marked me…”

“This means that a part of you is mine?” he asked with a dark smile.

“Yes, it means that, Dave” she tilted her head to the side as she watched him with her calmly glistening eyes.

“Then you better prepare yourself” he leant to her “because I’ll visit this part of mine often” he said and kissed her one more time.

She giggled and stole another kiss “Off with you, before she’ll miss you too much…”

Dave quickly collected the rest of his stuff and after a “bye” he left the small flat. When he got back to their suite, Jen decided to enjoy what her husband can give her. Dave couldn’t do anything else, he gave her what she wanted then after a long while, when his wife rested her head on his chest in her sleep, hugging him, a thought got stuck in his mind. He would be much happier if he could lie in another woman’s bed, whom he had to leave there. And from this he felt like a filthy bastard…

\---

The days passed by quickly and Anita was about to leave for Santa Barbara to see Martin. She was a bit nervous, because although her wounds healed, the deeper ones left scars and now these ran on her skin like white stripes. She didn’t mind them, but she felt that Mart won’t be that happy about them. Although the blonde man rarely showed, he was quite protective over his “territory” and she suspected that there are some things that he wouldn’t take not even from Dave, if these things concerned her. She wasn’t happy about it at all. She didn’t want the boys to debate because of her, or ruin the relationship between them. But the scars were too prominent so she couldn’t hide them. There was nothing to do, she had to go.

Martin was waiting for Anita at the airport – he couldn’t stay at home, because he hasn’t seen her in the last few weeks. He wiped off the sweat from his forehead with the back of his hand. He got used to it that sometimes the weather could be quite hot in Santa Barbara. This is why people can see him on tour often wearing sweaters or leather-jackets. Sometimes Andy and the guys joshed with him using the ‘frosty saint’ nickname on him, but this never bothered him. But now he was getting inpatient and decided to go inside to look at the display. As he thought: 15 minutes delay. He sighed then adjusted his sunglasses and sat down into one of the plastic chairs. He ran his fingers through his blonde curls as he checked his watch in every minute, waiting for Anita.

The huge plane touched the ground as it landed with a small dump. Anita stood up, took her bag from over her head and headed out from the plane. As she stepped out of it, the hot air hit her, but she started to get used to it. In the terminal she soon noticed her love and within seconds she forgot her worries and ended up in his arms. Martin kissed her for long minutes. He liked these first minutes after not seeing the woman he loved for a while and he greeted her with his long kisses, putting his arms around her.

“I’ve missed you” he whispered quietly into the black hair.

“I’ve missed you too” she hugged her tightly then soon they were on their way to the well-known black car to go home. Stepping into the house she didn’t have to wait for long to him to express that his top priority was now the bedroom.

Martin ate up the full lips hungrily and he already took her bag away from her just to let it fall on the ground, taking her face between his hands, pulling her gently towards the bedroom, not even breaking their kiss “I want to make love to you” he whispered onto the soft lips while his hands were already grabbing her round butt.

She couldn’t help herself – from this sentence she melted into her shoes, not being able to resist him. She just let him lead her. Soon they were standing in the master-bedroom, in front of the huge bed and Martin didn’t hesitate, not even for a second. He pushed her down on the bed right away. After a long kiss he sat up to kick down his shoes and take off her sandals too with a little smile in the corner of his lips. Then he took off his lightly sweaty T-shirt, tossing it on the floor. He leant over her again to go on with the battle of their kisses. One of his hands tugged up her tank top impatiently. She panted the same way from her rising desires, which washed over her body in waves. She wanted more so her hands were already loosening his belt.

He was a slave of his desires as he got lost in her eyes and pulled down her top. Not paying too much attention he started kissing the sensitive neck, going slowly downwards. But when he felt something strange under his lips, he opened his eyes and looked at the thing that broke the perfect softness of her skin. Suddenly he froze from the sight.

She was about to ask but then she looked down as well. And then she realized that her fears came true. For a few moments she could hear just Mart’s ragged breaths as he stared at the remained scars, which crisscrossed her white skin without any order. He pulled back a bit as he sat up and saw that the scars went on on her tummy. “What the fuck…? Who did this to you?” he looked at her shocked and worried “Did someone attack you?! Why didn’t you tell? Did you call the police?”

“No. Mart, no one has attacked me” Anita answered and sat up.

“Then what…?” he checked her skin once again confused then he slid one of his hands onto her face to look into her eyes “Baby, did you do this to yourself? Something has happened?”

“No, it wasn’t me.”

“Then who? I don’t get it… Please, tell me!” he asked softly.

She closed her eyes while she sighed. She felt that it’ll cause trouble. She quietly said “Dave…”

Martin couldn’t say a word and his hand fell back from her face onto his lap right away. The silence started to get annoyingly long as his eyes turned colder and darker with every minute. None of the previous passion could be found in them anymore. Anita was afraid as she looked into the dark eyes while she tried to seem as small as possible and prepare for the worst.

“Go on!” came his words like a lash.

“Well… well…” she stuttered. Look into his eyes! Look into his eyes! But no matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t bear the angry gaze so she rather looked at the sheet “He was there at the party where my last job was. He was there…”

“And?” came the next quiet but ice-cold question from the motionless man.

“Then… then later he came up… came up to me.”

“I assume he fucked you.”

“Don’t say it like this!” she broke out and she forced her tears back from the hard tone he used “You know him! You know how he is!”

“Yes, I know it exactly! And he knows me too! He knows…” he hissed “He knows how much I can protect what is mine…” he stood up not to let his anger explode next to her. To tell the truth he couldn’t look at her in that moment. “It’s not that he fucked you…” he couldn’t use another word for this because he knew that it had to be like that – brutal and wild sex “… but that he started cutting you too!” his voice shook with every word from the anger he felt.

“Me too?” Anita looked at him with glistening eyes.

“Dave had a period when… he liked cutting himself and it just turned him on even more when he could cut his actual girlfriends…” he hissed and needed all of his strength not to lose control “He MARKED them to himself…”

“Marke… No! I belong to you, not to him! Please! I swear!” she cried out, tears flowing from her eyes.

Martin laughed bitterly and shook his head then he folded his arms in front of his chest and stepped to the window. A few veins on his forehead were throbbing quickly from his anger.

“Martin, please! Please!” she stood up and stumbled to the blonde man, touching his arm “Don’t treat me like this!”

“You have no idea…” he started, but he rather took a deep breath “That fucking bastard…” he growled and the air around him nearly sparkled from his anger.

“How can you say something like this? You love him on your own way!”

“Don’t you understand it?!” he burst out and suddenly turned to her. The room echoed his angry voice “He can NEVER get enough!! He always wants more! And he’ll get what he wants! And now he wants you! He marked you! You gave a piece of you to him! DIDN’T YOU?!” he grabbed her upper-arms firmly.

“Let me go! It hurts!!” she sobbed, her tears flowing unstoppable.

“First answer me!! AM I RIGHT?!” he shook her.

“No… I don’t want… no… let me go! Let me go, please!”

Martin let her go without a word, but so suddenly that she fell on the floor and in the next moment the door bang shut behind him.

Like a helpless lion in his cage he paced on the corridor, sometimes hitting the wall with his fist and cursing loudly. He had to calm down a bit physically before he’d do anything. After a few minutes he opened the door and seeing her sobbing on the floor he walked to her.

Anita pulled towards the wall immediately “Please, don’t hurt me!” she whined.

“I won’t hurt you!” Martin’s face softened and went on his knees in front of her. Then he hugged her and pulled her close to him “I’m not angry at you, cuz you knew nothing about this. It’s my fault… I wanted him to… you…” his voice failed him “Please don’t be mad at me! I scared you. I’m a fool” he mumbled on a very sad tone into her black and fragrant hair.

Anita was still shocked and couldn’t really think, she was just fighting for air thanks to the suffocating effect of her crying. She didn’t really notice that Martin hugged her, she just went on with shaking.

“I’m sorry, honey” he said then loosened his embrace to caress her tear-stained face and look into the red eyes “Anita, my love, look at me!” he asked gently.

She needed a few minutes until her eyes cleared up and she could focus on Martin.

“Listen, baby” he looked at her seriously and stroked out her hair from her face “I won’t give you to him. You’re mine, you belong to me. You cannot be his! I want you to be mine. I love you, Anita… I love you” his voice failed him again and he pressed a kiss on her lips before burying his face into the fragrant neck, embracing her tightly.

“I don’t want… I don’t want you two to… fight because of me. I don’t want to ruin your relationship! It can’t happen! You cannot love me that much…” she sobbed again. Partly because she wouldn’t be able to bear the thought that the guys became enemies, partly because she heard and processed what Mart said to her.

“Shhh… everything’ll be alright, baby. I’ll take care of everything, don’t you worry…” he tried to calm her then he rather lifted her up and took her to the bed to gently lay her down. He lay next to her too and pulled her close “You’re mine, Anita, no one else can have you.”

She didn’t answer just smiled faintly while the last few teardrops ran into the mattress. Then she slowly fell asleep from the shock.


	16. Chapter 16

16.

Martin needed some days to calm down and see things from a more composed point of view and think through the happenings. Eight. This is the number of the scars that will always be there on his love’s body, thanks to Dave. He wasn’t able to control himself eight times. He harmed her – who wasn’t his – permanently eight times. He could be very angry if someone treated someone or something he “lent” to someone with disrespect. But of course he didn’t see Anita as an object, but Dave had to know that he just “lent” her to him and that she belongs to Martin. He had no right to treat her like this. And this is why he knocked on that certain flat’s door in New York.

Dave was sitting at home on the floor, watching television. He was alone in the flat, cuz Jen and the kids were on a whole-day-long event. He had some time to muse on the recently happened things. He didn’t know how Mart reacted on the scars, but he suspected that he wasn’t too happy about them. He lost control that night. He shouldn’t have, but it happened. He wasn’t proud of what he did. He knew the limits… He knew that sooner or later he has to face the consequences of his act and he wanted to be someone else just to avoid it. In that moment there was a knock at the door. He looked up. He wasn’t expecting anyone. He got up from the floor and reached for the remote to turn down the volume. He walked to the door and opened it. When he saw Martin, he didn’t say a word just stepped aside and let him walk into the flat.

“We have to talk” he gritted through his teeth. His whole being radiated his cold distant attitude “I guess you know why I’m here.”

“Yes, I suspect. And I guess I know what you think of me… again” Dave sighed.

“Really? Tell me what I think of you.”

Dave sat down “That I’m a filthy bastard, who has no respect for the limits and always wants more. A jerk who thinks he’s a god, who thinks that he can have everything… and I could go on. I know what they say about me.”

“You summed it up quite good” Mart said coldly as he stood in front of a book shelf, his arms folded in front of his chest, facing away from Dave.

“It won’t help if I said that I’m sorry and I’ve lost my mind and I rowed myself, would it?”

“It’s a quite weak excuse. If it was the first time, I’d believe you.”

“If it was the first time…” Dave repeated quietly rather just for himself.

“You know what I’m talking about.”

“Probably about one of the million.”

“Yes. Dave” Martin sighed and finally turned to him “I don’t want this to ruin our friendship or relationship, BUT” he emphasized the last word “I want you to see clearly – and mark my word when I say clearly – that Anita belongs to me and with marking her to yourself – like you used to do with your girlfriends, whom you could talk over to do this insanity – you fucking hurt me! What do you think how did it feel when I saw those typical scars on her and I managed to pull it out of her that it was YOU? What do you think how should I have interpreted them? It looked to me pretty much as a message that says ‘look at her, your girlfriend is mine’. And you were the one at the beginning who made it clear that she has to belong to me in the first place.”

“I’m sorry Mart! I just…” he sighed “You know me. You know my beast” he meant his animalistic side, which he couldn’t control or just with great difficulties “I tried to stop it, but…” he sighed again, hopelessly “I will never get rid off it. Ever.”

Martin didn’t answer. He couldn’t, because he knew. They’ve talked about this countless times. “I was a fool to let Anita close to your beast. From now on she’ll always wear the signs of its eight claws.”

“Luckily just that much” he murmured.

“It’s more than enough. She told me that you gave her quite some cuts and then you left her there… But don’t get me wrong, she didn’t complain, she’s too pride to do that.”

“I didn’t leave her there because I wanted to!” Dave burst out suddenly.

“Cuz of Jenny, right?” Mart grimaced.

“Yes” his mate growled reluctantly.

“I see…” he ran his finger along the spine of a book then he rubbed his slightly dusty fingertips together, lost in his thoughts “I don’t get one thing. How did you talk her over? I mean didn’t she protest at all? I just cannot understand this, cuz I don’t know her like someone who’d go easily into such rough things.”

“Haven’t you asked her?”

“No. She was quite shocked. I think she was afraid of my reactions in this topic.”

“What did you do to her?” Dave looked up at him balefully.

“Nothing” he shrugged.

Dave snorted in disbelief “I know you when you’re angry. I bet you freaked her out.”

“It’s true that I scared her” he sighed and finally sat down into one of the armchairs. Suddenly he felt himself so very tired and spent. He was fed up with the problems and he just wanted to forget them and drink something strong, but he couldn’t do either of these things. He fisted his hands a bit nervously. They were slightly shaking.

“Mart” Dave touched his knee gently “Are you okay?”

“No, David” he covered his face with his hands as he propped his elbows on his knees.

“Do you want to tell me?”

“I’m tired of all the fighting. I don’t want to compete with you for Anita or for anyone else. I have so much tension in me that I feel like exploding in any minute. I can’t keep order in my head for long…” he leant back, resting his head on the back of the armchair “Oh god, I’d sell my soul for a glass of whiskey…” he whispered the last sentence rather for just himself.

“You’ve already sold it. And by the way, you don’t have to compete with me. Why should you? Everyone gets what he or she wants.”

“Would you explain it?” he asked, not looking up.

“Which part do you mean?”

“You don’t want to take Anita from me, do you?” he looked up at him and it was the first time when fear glistened in his eyes.

“No. You’re really afraid of this possibility, aren’t you?”

“Yes… You know, since my divorce… I had no one whom I loved this much. She’s important to me. I think, very much. We see a lot of things in the same way. David, I think I’m in love with her. And I fear for our relationship. Even from you. I know you. You take things easier. Which can seem just a game to you, it can hurt me fatally.”

“Then let’s break up our threesome.”

Mart swallowed hard. He didn’t see this coming. “You’d want to get out voluntarily?”

“If it disturbs you this much” Dave answered and tried to hide that every inch of his being tried to protest against this.

Martin remained silent for a long minute, musing and weighting what he heard. “Tell me what does our triangle means to you. Please.”

Dave took a deep breath then slowly exhaled, thinking hard. “A company where I can be myself and no one judges me for that. Where I love to be, where I give to the other two persons what they deserve. Where I can be with those whom I love.”

Martin was considering every word of Dave for long minutes again “You meant the ‘we all get what we want’ comment on this?”

“Yes. Or at least it means this to me. I get you – and we can say that it has been one of my biggest desires for years. I can finally love you without limits and on my own way. And then you introduced me to Anita as well.”

“What does she mean to you?”

“It’s very complicated. I don’t know. She doesn’t mean that much like you. She will never mean more than you. I’m not saying that she isn’t important. She’s just… different.”

“I see. Would you tell me if this changes or gets clearer for you? I don’t want to have any surprises. Our situation is very complicated.”

“Sure” Dave answered then looked out of the window.

“I don’t want to break up our threesome. I love being with you two too and I know that she feels the same. I just want you to see the limits clearly. You and your beast” he smiled bitterly.

“Either you accept that it’s in me, or it’ll be better for me to get out.”

“Dave, all of us has their own beast. Some has a smaller, some has a bigger beast. I have my own too, whom I have been fighting for long years.”

“You mean your alcoholism?”

“Yeah” and this time he was the one who looked aside.

“At least you don’t eat up women alive” he grimaced “And you’ve finally realized it. I hope you do something about it. I don’t want to lose you.”

“Dave, since I’m with Anita, I don’t drink. That’s why my hands are shaking, that’s why I’m more tired. But it’s better. She’s worth it. You know it from first hands how hard it can be” he looked at Dave’s face and for a moment it flashed in front of his eyes how the singer looked when he used heavily “I’ve been drinking nearly from my childhood as well. But now I’m in the winning position.”

“Yes, I know. But I’m glad that you start to get out of it” he said then went silent for a minute before going on “But now I ask you to leave.”

Martin looked at him shocked “You throw me out?”

“I wouldn’t put it that way. I just want to be alone. I want to think.”

“Alright. If you feel so, call me” Mart stood up “Stay, I let myself out” he squeezed Dave’s shoulder reassuringly then he ran the back of his index-finger along the stubbly face. Finally he slowly walked out with a sigh.

Dave didn’t look back when Martin closed the door. He sighed and let his head fall back to the back of the couch. He seriously considered getting out of this. And not really because of himself. Martin told him so many things! He would be happy with Anita. Dave saw on him that he really loved her and his presence in the picture was just frustration for Mart. The blonde man didn’t know how to stay faithful to both of them, or how to handle his relationship with Anita. Dave didn’t want to cause more trouble. Martin even stopped drinking because of her! He does something about it! Anita managed to do something that he and the band couldn’t reach for years, no matter how many times they tried! And now the man – whom he loved and would do anything – could be happy. No matter what, he’ll do anything for him. He won’t cause any more trouble.

\---

Anita was sitting on the huge balcony, where Dave had spent a lot of time when he was in Santa Barbara. But she wasn’t mesmerized by the landscape now. She was lost in her thoughts. It has been a while since Dave called and she was afraid that after that last conversation Mart had with him, Dave misunderstood what the blonde man tried to say. She knew that Martin just wanted to protect her from Dave’s “beast” (later Mart gave her a detailed explanation what this meant by the singer), and Mart didn’t want to get rid off him. But it seemed that the singer got to this latter conclusion. Probably this big idiot loves Martin that much that he rather gets out from this relationship, not wanting to hurt Mart. It’s very noble of him, but stupid as well. Anita saw that Martin was suffering because he didn’t know anything about Dave. Maybe he was afraid that the singer will do something stupid? And she missed him as well – she had to confess this to herself.

The blond man missed his friend too, but he wanted to give time to him. He hoped that sooner or later he’ll come back to them, because he won’t bear it without them. But he was afraid that he used the wrong words a few weeks ago in New York when he visited him to clear things up. It hurt that he wasn’t there. Mart was just sitting days long in his studio, thinking about the happenings and he wrote down his thoughts in the form of lyrics. He didn’t know what to do. In his mind he suggested the singer to check in finally. He nearly died sometimes from the longing to call him. He was in constant waiting. He was waiting for Dave.

On one of the especially quiet days the phone rang.

“Dave?” he sighed with relief, but a bit still tense. It was a good sign that at least he called him. He was just afraid that he did it to tell him that he’s out.

“How did you know that it’s me? You see in the future now?”

“No, I saw that it was you” Mart smiled “What’s up? I’ve heard of you awfully long ago…”

“Well, yes. I had to think a bit. I just thought I ask what’s up with you two.”

“We both miss you.”

“Really?”

“I wouldn’t say it if it wasn’t true” he smiled again, which Dave could hear just in his softened voice “Where do you wander nowadays?”

“Well, now I’m around SB. I had some errands to run here and I thought that before I fly back to NYC, I give you a call.”

“Really? Then why are you wasting the time? Come here right now!” Mart’s face lit up even more.

“Right now?” he repeated with a smile.

“Right away, you silly!”

“Maybe I can jump in for a few minutes. I go” and he hung up just to wait in front of the door after 20 minutes.

Mart was already waiting for him in the door and greeted him with a tight embrace “I nearly went crazy from your long silence!”

“I think you’re already insane enough” he answered with a faint smile when Martin let him step in “Anita?”

“She’s cooking inside. I didn’t tell her that you were coming. I thought you’d be a nice surprise.”

“To tell the truth I came here cuz we have to talk” he looked at Martin seriously.

The smile faded away a bit from his face “Yes, I think the same. Come in, don’t just stand here.”

Dave followed him into the living room and sat down onto the couch until Martin went out to the kitchen to call Anita in.

“Come, sweetie, I have a surprise for you” he took her by the hand “Turn off the stove.”

“It’s such a big surprise?” she asked back, but obeyed.

“You’ll see” and he led her into the living room, where Dave was waiting for them.

“Dave!” she screamed his name and soon she ended up in his neck, as if she never wanted to let him go. There was no chance to get free from her grip. She nagged gently at him for disappearing like this and she told him how worried she has been and asked him not to dare to do something like this ever again. Then she slowly let him go and sat next to him.

Dave waited until Martin sat down as well and started talking. “I had more reasons for my disappearance. I’m sure Martin told you” he looked at Anita “that we talked and I had to think. I had a lot to process. The thing I did to you is unforgivable. I had no right to do so, not to mention that I hurt you. We cleared the limits at the very beginning and I stepped over them. It’s not right. Martin loves you very much and I feel that I’m just disturbing this. No, don’t get me wrong, you two are not the ones who let me feel this” he said when he saw that she wanted to say something “I see it. You, Anita, managed to do such things which even I couldn’t do. Just your love was enough for Martin to stop drinking. Did you know this? Did you know how long he has been trying to do something against it – alone or with our help? How much he drank? I ask this just to clear how important this act of yours is. Marin became very upset when he saw your scars and I know that you did the same. I’ve seen Martin when he was angry, I had several opportunities. I know that both of you fret yourselves cuz of me. What, when and how to do; whom you love better, whom you belong to; is there a contest for you or not. And I don’t want this. I don’t want to stay in the way of your happiness, so I think I’ll step aside. This way you won’t have to live under such pressure and you can finally have a normal life – and I think both of you deserve that.

His audience stared at the singer in shock then Anita was the first who started protesting. “Dave, don’t do this!” she was really frightened that she can lose him “I don’t want you to feel guilty cuz of us! Although I don’t see everything as well as you two do, because you have a long history – well, you already knew each other when I wasn’t even born – but despite this I’ve managed to realize that your relationship is special and I find it beautiful. And I don’t want it to be ruined cuz of me or the other things you said. Dave, Martin loves you too and he needs you! You’re each others’ support and if one of you isn’t nearby, the other wavers. Your lives are too interwoven just to cut it this way. I’m not mad at you because of what happened, cuz I enjoyed it and I would’ve taken more, if it made you happy” she took one of his hands “Tell me Dave, do you really want to quit our threesome or you just want to ‘sacrifice’ yourself for us?”

“I don’t want to become a martyr and it’d be quite difficult for me to deal with a life without you, but if it’s for your sake… And don’t sell yourself for my happiness.”

“You say silly things, Dave… I think I can say that our interest is to see you happy as well. Dave, we need you. Don’t ask me to watch you walk out that door, showing your back to everything we have, where we can be free” she said and tears were welling up in her eyes.

“David, she’s right…” Mart whispered quietly.

“You really want this?” he looked at them seriously. They nodded in the same time. Dave laughed, honestly “Well, then if you love me and stick to me this much, I think I’ll stay.”

“Yaaaay!” Anita squeaked and landed in his neck again to give a smacking kiss onto his lips “You silly, don’t you dare to play with our nerves like this ever again!”

But Dave couldn’t answer – he just laughed and laughed. He got rid off a lot of tension and he felt himself finally free and happy. He was really happy.

\--- 

After they finally cleared up the fate of their threesome, they tried to spend as much time together as possible. Commuting from here to there made it a bit hard, but they’ve got already used to that. When Martin was busy or Anita couldn’t go to Santa Barbara, she met Dave, because New Jersey wasn’t that far from New York City. Of course now Dave didn’t push his limits, he learned his lesson. At the beginning when he was with Anita, a few times he seemed a bit unsure – especially when he spotted one of the eight scars. Once he even offered her that he’ll pay for the reconstruction surgery, if she wanted to make them disappear, but she laughed out loud and asked why she should want to get rid off this memory of Dave. Because as she’s said on that other night she gave a part of her to him and that’ll always be with him. Of course she asked him to keep this between them. So slowly the singer eased up and he tried to control his “beast” as best as he could. And the other couple – despite a few debates – had no problems either. But of course the boys found some time for themselves as well, because thanks to the band’s issues they had to meet a few times and travel here and there, and they visited each others’ studios, too. This time Dave managed to keep the balance between his life at home and with their threesome. Finally everything seemed perfect


	17. Chapter 17

17.

Anita was sitting alone at home under a warm blanket. It didn’t matter that it was 25 degrees outside, she still felt cold. She didn’t pay too much attention to it, because her temperature was more ectothermal than warm-blooded – she was able to freeze in 40 degrees as well. She was peacefully typing on her laptop, working on one of her papers, which had to be at least 30 pages long. She was a little bit short of time, but she always paid attention on her studies and in this question not even the boys could change her mind. If it was about her studies, she was able to say no to the guys, because she knew that she was working on her future and she didn’t want to live like this anymore. She didn’t want to stay in a small flat with very few money. She never let Martin – or Dave – to get involved in her money matters; she wanted to pay everything from her own strength.

But she slowly crawled out from the comfy bed, carefully – not to accidentally wake her cat – and she walked into the kitchen to get some fruit. Lately she started to eat a lot of fruits, but she was happy about this. Maybe she got a taste of healthy life and she’ll be able to lose some weight. On her way back she stroked her cat and was about to return to her paper, but she rather reached for her cell phone and wrote something dirty to Martin. Since their triangle sorted out things she was a bit ashamed in front of herself, because she had to confess that sex was constantly on her mind. These two men drove her crazy. Before meeting them she was a shy, withdrawn girl, who thought that earning money for food was much more important than sex. But now she could barely concentrate from her thoughts. When the last time came into her mind when they were together, she had to blush even from the memory and she got horny right away. And she had a lot of erotic dreams – and lately often Dave had the main role in them…

Somewhere she was even shocked from herself because during a few months she has changed her prickly, I-refuse-people attitude. Although still these two men stayed nearly the only exceptions. And she caught herself sometimes planning her future on Mart’s side. She imagined that she moves in with him and while Mart is working in his studio, she uses her knowledge in her future job. In their free time they make love – the two or the three of them. She smiled from this thought while she finished her apple. She was very happy that things got sorted out between them and everything was alright now. And she felt grateful too that these two wonderful guys awoke and allured forth the woman inside of her. The woman, who saved and closed her paper and stretched. She thought how good it would be to cuddle into the embrace of one of them. She bit her lower-lip and reached for her phone to call her dark-haired lover. She asked if he was available for the night. She was lucky, he’ll be alone in his flat the whole night long. She smiled on the tone Dave used and purred that she’s a very welcomed guest by him.

As soon as she hung up, she started packing. She couldn’t stop herself from hurrying when the only thought in her mind was that the sooner she gets ready, the sooner she can be with Dave. She quickly called her friend and asked her to take care of her cat then she was already on her way. Within an hour she knocked on Dave’s door. He nearly immediately opened it and pulled her in – not letting go of her and kissing her passionately. Anita smiled seeing that he wanted her as much as she did. She smiled into the kiss and pulled back a bit, grabbing his wrists as he was holding her face between his hands “Hey, hey! You mentioned some dinner as well, didn’t you?”

“Oh yes! I made it” he laughed “I don’t know how much you like sea food” he started leading her towards the kitchen.

“Well, I rarely ate such things, but I like tuna” she giggled.

“Tuna” he waved with his hand “I’m talking about caviar and shore crabs and clam.”

Anita blinked a bit unsure “Clam?”

“Clam. Don’t you like it?”

“Well, I haven’t tried it yet, but I have a not so nice picture of them in my head, but we’ll see. I hope I won’t choke on anything…” she took Dave’s hand and let him pull her towards the dining room, which wasn’t separated from the kitchen. Then she suddenly giggled “Hey, didn’t you make some oysters for yourself?”

“You think I need it?” the singer smiled darkly.

“Well I don’t know how much aphrodisiac you need to trigger your desires when you’re with such a little girl like me…” she flirted with him.

“I don’t really need help from such things” he pulled her close so that she could feel the proof.

“Hmm…” she smiled kinkily and said what came into her mind without thinking “I love it when your cock is this hard from me…”

“You do?”

“Beyond words…” she stroked along the front of his trousers “But let me torture you a bit more. Let’s eat before that.”

“Alright. After all I cooked for you” Dave giggled and led her to her seat, putting different kind of sea foods onto her plate.

“Hm, they look good, although I have to admit that I have some prejudices against some of them…” she mused eyeing the selection then she flashed an angelic smile on Dave “Will you show me how I have to eat them? I mean the ones that are tricky…” 

“Sure” and he started to teach her how to eat the crabs. They ate peacefully when Dave said “Oh, I nearly forgot the calamari. It’s related to polyps and the giant cuttlefish. You wanna try it?” he offered the plate.

But as the calamari’s scent hit her nose, she felt like she’s going to be sick, so she quickly covered her mouth with one hand and held up the other.

Dave put down the plate immediately and hurried to her “Are you okay?” he asked with worry.

“Uhm. I’m sorry” she stood up and hurried into the bathroom. For a few minutes she struggled with her stomach, but at the end the food stayed down. She washed her face with some cold water and took deep breaths as she looked into the mirror.

Dave calmly waited for her return and when she appeared, he led her to the couch “I’m sorry. Sea food wasn’t such a bright idea.”

“I’m fine. I don’t know why my stomach became upset. I guess cuz all of the new food. I’m sorry” she looked at him a bit still pale and guiltily.

“No problem, it happens – especially by the calamari. And… don’t you want to help your stomach with digesting the food with a little physical exercise?” he nuzzled to her.

“Geez, you’re so dirty, Dave” she giggled “Come here!” she pulled him closer on the couch.

She didn’t have to ask twice, soon he was kissing her neck while he got rid off her halter and started grabbing her breasts.

“Hmm… what if you made me yours gently this time?” she sighed into his ear then pulled him up for a deep kiss.

“Gently? Are you really the Anita I expected to show up?” Dave giggled.

“I am. But I’m too tired to the wild things now and…” here she stopped and giggled too “… I don’t want to risk that the food I managed to keep down comes back…”

“Alright, then we spare your little stomach. Come here, you!” and he returned to what he was doing.

\---

After a few hours of gentle lovemaking and a little sleep Anita said goodbye in the morning from the slightly exhausted, but contended man. She took his disheveled picture with her on the way home. But by the time she reached her door, she tried to quickly search for her key and she could barely reach the bathroom, where she finally got rid off the remains of her dinner. She wiped off the tears from the strain and tried to calm down after nothing has left in her stomach.

She looked into the mirror and saw that she looked like a wreck. As she looked deeply into her own eyes through the mirror, she started thinking. Yes, this can be a sign of a virus, or the results of the sea food, but it can be… no, that can’t be… She closed her eyes. One of her greatest fears started to take shape in front of her. She didn’t even want to accept the possibility, but she had to be sure, so she took her bag and walked to the nearest pharmacy. Her hands were shaking as she put the box into her bag. Fear washed over her in growing waves. She didn’t want to think too much into it until she wasn’t sure, but her mind was way ahead of her. As soon as she arrived home, she put everything aside and went into the bathroom. She carefully read the paper in the box, because this was the first time she held something like this in her hand. While her pulse raced she read through the text then followed the instructions and now she had to wait. These were the longest minutes in her life.

The minutes passed slowly and the result showed up. One stripe negative, two stripes positive. Anita forgot to breathe as the first striped appeared. For a fragment of a second she let her fears go, but they returned immediately when the second blue line appeared too. Positive. She’s pregnant.

She felt like the world was collapsing around her. This can’t be!

“I cannot be pregnant! It’s impossible!” she moaned and checked her pills. They didn’t expire and the right number of pills were missing… But as she checked her calendar, she saw that she didn’t even notice that her PMs was late with one and a half week. Did her studies, her duties and the boys busy her this much?!

“Oh my god, the boys…” she sat back onto the edge of the bathtub shocked. How the hell should she tell them? And what will they say? She was already afraid of Mart’s reaction, because she still had some months before she turned 21 and… what if he isn’t the father? She shivered from this thought and her stomach flipped again, but with a few deep breaths she calmed herself down a bit. First of all she has to see a doctor to be 100% sure about it. After she was finally ready to leave the bathroom, her hands were still shaking as she reached for her bag again. She hoped that the test was wrong – because it can be wrong – but somewhere deep she knew that it showed the truth. Soon her doctor confirmed her suspicions so she went home with a deadly pale face.

What should she say to the boys? How should she tell them? And how will they react? And should she keep it at all? She felt that she’ll need more days to think about this to come up with every possibility. She knew that they already have a quite complicated situation and no one wanted a baby in the picture – especially not her, because she’s still a student and she felt herself awfully young and immature for a kid… and for being a mother! Sure, she wants kids, but really not NOW, when she’s barely 21! It came into her mind that she won’t tell it to the boys and do the abortion, but in her heart she knew that she cannot do this to them. They have to sit down and talk things over. The idea was already born in her head that she should do this by one of the guys to give her the opportunity to leave the place if necessary – cuz remembering Mart’s previous outburst she was afraid that she’ll need it. She really hoped that they can talk about things in a normal way and figure out something…

But when should she tell them? Should she wait for a few days or should she tell it right now? No… the guys wouldn’t like it, if she didn’t tell them right away when something happens to her. And this was very much their business too. She pulled herself together and reached for her phone to call Mart and tell him on a shaking voice that they have to talk.

\---

Anita’s heart was racing when she knocked on the door of Dave’s studio. At the end they agreed that they can meet there, cuz the band had to arrange some things in New York anyway. Anita wasn’t thrilled that she has to disturb the guys with this, but she had no choice. The sooner she tells them, the sooner they can figure out something. Or at least she really hoped so. It was still strange and a bit alien to her that a new life was growing in her body. She was still trying to adjust to the thought.

Dave was a bit nervous as he was waiting in the studio, because they had a lot of work, but he tried to be patient. Anita wants to tell them something important and he has to respect this. He looked at Martin, who was sitting on the sofa. The blond man’s head was full of thoughts. He wasn’t thinking just on Anita’s important news, but on many other things about the band and his life. He was worried about Viva’s lately behavior – he had to talk with his ex-wife about it a few times and he hoped that they’ll find a solution for that problem soon, too. But now he focused on Anita as he turned towards the door with a pensive look. Dave jumped a bit from the knock on the door and he invited his guest to come in.

Anita slid through the door quietly and already felt their looks startling. She saw on them that they had better things to deal with right now than her and that they wanted to go.

“Hi” Dave said “Anita, I’m sorry, but can we get over with this quickly? Because we have a lot to work and we’re running out of time.”

“Well…” she started and felt that she already started sweating. Maybe this wasn’t the best time for her to come. Maybe she could win some more time for herself. “If I’m in the way, I can come back later when you don’t have that much work” she said quietly and turned her look away.

“No, no, if it’s important, tell us now” he asked her “We always have this much time for you. Just hurry, please” he glimpsed at his watch.

Anita thought that she won’t be able to say a word, especially when she saw Martin frowning.

“Is something wrong?” he asked her.

She swallowed hard. Then again and cleared her throat. She felt her cheeks burning and that her voice will shake.

“Boys… the situation is the following…”

“Yes?” Dave pushed her.

“Dave, this is important. And very hard” she spluttered then looked at them both one more time. Her voice shook and failed her as she faltered out “I’m pregnant.”

Dave’s eyes narrowed and darkened “Anita, you know well that it’s not a good joke and it’s not the best time to say it” he hissed coldly. 

She took a step back from the cold tone, which was like a lash for her. She glimpsed at the shocked Martin helplessly, but looked back at Dave right away. “Dave…” she swallowed hard again “I’m not joking…”

“Are you serious?” he asked barely audible.

Anita could just nod and looked at Dave and Mart in turns, still not knowing what to do or say. The blond man still didn’t react, he just stared at her frozen.

“This is just… fucking fantastic!” Dave broke out at the end of his sentence then hit a nearby table. He didn’t stop here – soon the objects on the table landed on the floor with a loud noise.

Anita jumped, although she counted with such a reaction – well, not from Dave. She didn’t know what to say so she just whispered “Dave, I’m sorry.”

“You’re sorry…” he huffed. The anger disappeared from his eyes and gave its place to something else. It seemed like… fear. “And what do you want to do now? You run and tell it to the press? You send Martin to jail?”

“ARE YOU CRAZY?!” she shouted “Why would I do something like that?”

“This baby from me or from Martin is like a jackpot.”

“You really misread my feelings this much?” she narrowed her eyes painfully.

“Anita… I don’t know you. We just fucked.”

“Aha…” she turned away, her voice failing her again and she nearly suffocated from the pain around her heart.

“And what do you want to do know?” Dave’s next question came “You want to keep it?”

“I don’t know…” she swallowed back her tears. She needed all of her strength not to fall into pieces right there “Mart? You don’t want to say anything?”

“Anita…” he sighed and looked at her still shocked and helplessly. The pain was visible in his eyes too.

“Sure… it’d be much simpler to you two, if I didn’t keep it, right?” the first bitter tears ran down her pale face.

“True” Dave admitted “No matter how we look at it, this baby is dangerous for us.”

“Mart?” she looked at him questioningly. She didn’t want to show it, but he was the last straw she could hold on to.

“I don’t know Anita… there are so many tumblers in this… If you keep it, it’ll be already suspicious, cuz you’re only 20. And people don’t have to be that smart to figure out everything. If we look at your trips, that you’ve disappeared for days with Dave and me… It wouldn’t be fair to us.”

She nodded shocked as fresh tears ran down her face “Good bye then…” she whispered on a whiny voice and without saying anything else she closed the door behind her. She felt as if they ripped out her heart and she left it there for them in the studio, letting them playing with it as they wished.

\---

Dave sighed. He was confused – he couldn’t deal with this right now. Finally he looked at Martin “You think we did the right thing?”

“I’m not sure. I don’t know… This… came out of the blue…” he ran his hands along his careworn face. He felt as if he got older with years within these few minutes. “After all one of us is its father…”

“But who is it?”

“You know well that I don’t know the answer for that either. It would have turned out just in the case, if she kept it. It’s true that it’s more comfortable for us this way, but for her? I’m worried Dave… she can break from this. And see? We let her down…”

Dave didn’t answer right away, he stared at the floor for a while “But she knows too that she cannot keep it! It’d ruin too many things. It’d ruin the work of a whole life. Maybe you’d let it, but I wouldn’t. The band isn’t just a part of my life, it became mine, a part of me and I’m not willing to sacrifice it for an accident! Mart, even you can’t ask this from me.”

“No, I can’t ask it. I can understand you too” he answered and his longing eyes got stuck on a half-empty whiskey bottle, which was left there by the guys a few days ago. Now he really wanted to drink a big glass of it to calm his nerves.

“Don’t tell me that you’d sacrifice Depeche for Anita.”

“Well, jail isn’t too alluring for me…” he sighed and turned away as he walked to one of the windows “So this was it?”

“It seems…” Dave sighed. No. Nothing lasts forever.

Martin couldn’t comprehend it. This whole thing came so quickly. He didn’t want to lose Anita. But he couldn’t imagine her to give a child to them. Although… maybe, maybe it wouldn’t be bad at all, if the circumstances were different… But no, this is the best they can do, even if his heart broke from it that their threesome and his love for her had to end this roughly and suddenly.

“I’ll miss her very much…” he whispered and the sun that peeked out from the running clouds lit a single tear on his face.

Dave didn’t say a word. He knew that sooner or later something catastrophic will happen. Although their relationship didn’t get public, everything shattered around him. He shook his head, took a deep breath then headed for the door. It was time to work.


	18. Chapter 18

18.

By the time she closed her main door, she couldn’t see from her tears. It was a mistake to hope that things will be in a different way. They let her down. They threw her out like she was a used rag. And now she’s alone again – with an huge problem. What should she do? Should she really kill it? Would she solve the problem with it and get her old life back? No. She will never get that back. She collapsed in front of the door and sobbed unstoppably.

It was true that doing the abortion would be the best choice, but for now she couldn’t decide. She felt that she will need a few days to decide that. And next to this the most painful thing was that Martin let her walk out of his life this easily – without saying a word! Didn’t he love her then? Was he such a great actor? He needed her just while he could have his fun with her? With her – with a naïve little 20 years old chick, whom he could fuck even if it was against the law? Were these beautiful few months a lie? Haven’t she suffered enough yet? Does she really have to fall on her face from higher and higher every time?

\---

Dave was exhausted as he walked into his apartment. Luckily he was alone. Probably Jen wouldn’t be happy with a rough rejection from her husband. He threw himself into one of the armchairs, rested his head on its back and his thoughts were just running and running in his head. He didn’t want to treat the girl like that, but he couldn’t afford the luxury to take her side. He just couldn’t. Because of his name and the band. A lot of people think that he, Dave Gahan, can do anything he wants. But they were wrong – the thing he mostly wanted, he just couldn’t do it. He couldn’t get into his car and drive to Anita’s place to comfort her. He couldn’t tell her that he was very happy about the baby and that he’d like her to give birth to it and raise it together. Together, all three of them. In their triangle where each of them found their inner peace and acceptance. But instead of this now he had to stay in his flat and he couldn’t move from his marriage, he couldn’t go after Anita, he couldn’t say anything to her. He had to let go of the last months, of the past with Anita, the baby, and… yes, of Mart too. Never again.

\---

Martin couldn’t find his place although days have passed since. Kessy and the others gave up on him. Earlier they tried to drag him out of his own thoughts when they were on some meetings. Soon they recognized that Martin is useless. But no one could make him tell what his problem was. Because everyone could see that he’s totally broken. That afternoon’s happenings replayed in his head over and over again and he overanalyzed the circumstances, trying to find the best solution, but he always ended up with the same result: the abortion and saying goodbye. And even if they wouldn’t have to say goodbye, he wasn’t sure that Anita’d talk to him ever again after asking her to kill their baby.

Mart just floated with the day. He didn’t know how he got back to his hotel room. Dave didn’t talk to him too much either. He knew that nothing’ll be the same ever again. He knew that the singer’ll close up himself and saw that all three of them were sentenced to lonely suffering. He slowly went insane from the tension and from the lack of information. He took his coat, but instead of going to a cheap bar to drink himself unconscious, after an hour he knocked on a well-known door. He hoped that she’ll let him in.

Anita was unconscious on the bed. Empty pill bottles were lying around her. She couldn’t bear the pain. She didn’t do the abortion yet, but it didn’t really matter anymore. She didn’t want to commit suicide, she just wanted to forget. She didn’t hear Martin’s knocking.

When he didn’t get an answer for the umpteen knocking, he strained against the door. He couldn’t be sure that she was at home, but the pile of letters under the door gave him the hint that she has been in the flat for days. He was very afraid that she did something stupid, so with a few tries he kicked the door in. He searched the flat with a worried expression and for a moment his blood froze in his veins when he spotted the dead pale curled-up woman with the empty packs around her. He ran to her immediately and he couldn’t recall how he had his cell already in his hand, but he dialed 911 right away. Then he took her in his arms and checked her pulse. Luckily the worst thing didn’t happen yet. It was weak, but palpable.

“Oh my god, what have we done?” he moaned into the silence of the room.

\---

Anita came round slowly. She saw the white ceiling. She tried to swallow, but her throat hurt very badly. Although she didn’t know, a gastric lavage saved her life. She tried to speak, but just some whining left her lips. She felt another warm hand on hers. With much difficulty she turned her head to the side.

It was Martin sitting there with stubbles and a careworn expression, watching the pale girl with worry. He didn’t say a word, but his eyes were telltale – and wet.

“M…Mart?” Anita coughed.

“No, don’t speak” he whispered “They washed out your stomach, this is why you cannot talk.”

“The… the baby…”

“It’s alive…” he glimpsed down at her hand that he was holding between his own “But nothing’s sure yet.”

“I… I was so stupid. I shouldn’t have done this…” she started, but her words ended up in coughing.

“Shhh…” he gently put his hand on her shoulder then reached for a plastic cup to carefully give her some water.

She gulped slowly and gratefully then when Mart helped her to lay back she asked “Dave?”

Mart didn’t answer right away and when he did, he avoided eye-contact. He looked up just at the end. “I told him, but… he had no time to come.”

“No… no time… to come?!” she panted.

Martin stayed silent and just shook his head “I’m sorry.”

Anita tired to hold her tears back. So she had really lost the singer for good…

“Please… Anita answer my question…” he stroked her hand gently “Did you try to kill yourselves?”

“Why do you care? You have… already killed the baby!”

Suddenly Mart found swallowing difficult “You’re right…” he whispered and broke under the weight of accusing himself.

She just watched him accusingly “Why are you here? Why did you come… to me? What do you want from me?!” she hissed at the end.

“I miss you” he whispered through the lump in his throat.

“But you don’t want the baby…” she answered coldly.

“Oh god, Anita…” his voice failed him “You cannot imagine… how happy I’d be, if… if we were in different circumstances.”

“The circumstances… But you, the famous and rich Martin Gore… cannot afford such a shame, right?!”

“I don’t give a shit to that, Anita!” he looked up with red eyes “But it’s not just about me, but about a lot of other people! The band isn’t just the three of us – it means hundreds of other people and then I didn’t even mention our families and jail…”

“Sure. I understand…” she turned her head towards the window.

“I know that you don’t and I don’t blame you for that” Martin sighed then used his most gentle tone as he said “But maybe you can see too that this is the best solution for all of us…”

“No…” she turned back “This is the most comfortable solution for you two! You left me there alone with a baby and you wouldn’t want to take responsibility for that! You’re cowards and spineless!”

“Yes, we are” he gave up “I guess you don’t see any chance for us to go on after this… If you hate me this much.”

“You’d go on? And why?”

“Because I love you… I cannot stop thinking of you. I’m always thinking about this situation, hoping to find a better solution, but I can’t. Anita, you’ll ruin your life with this baby as well” he whispered at the end.

“And if it happens again? I took my pills, Martin! If I get pregnant again, you’ll send me to an abortion again?”

“No. We’d be more careful. I’d wear condoms, or dunno. And by the way a baby is only dangerous until you turn major.”

“Thank you for worrying Martin, but you go to fucking hell! You’d keep me for fun, like an object, but you don’t take responsibility! Get out! Go to hell!”

“Anita, I didn’t…” he began, but she didn’t let him finish.

“Don’t worry, I’ll get rid off the proof that could ruin you or Dave, who was such a spineless bastard that he didn’t even dare to come here” she took a deep breath “I don’t want to see you ever again. Understood?” she whispered.

Martin bent his head and let her hand go “Understood. And… I’m so very sorry” he stood up “I didn’t want it like this… Good bye, Anita, I respect your decision…” he looked at her one more time with huge pain in his heart then with sunken shoulders and a heavy heart he left her alone.

Anita just stared at the ceiling and in her anger he silently hit the mattress a few times, while her tears were running down her face unstoppably. If it wouldn’t hurt that much…

\---

After a few days Anita was released from the hospital. The doctor said that because she was brought in soon, it wasn’t likely that the meds did any damage to the baby. Anita listened to him without any emotions. It didn’t matter anymore. She stopped the doctor and went to her gynecologist to sign herself up for the abortion, although her heart broke every time she thought of it. So she tried not to think too much about it. She tried to suppress the thought that she was about to kill a human being because of these two… she couldn’t even find a word for the boys. They not just broke her, but they even wanted to make her a killer. Well, she’ll give them what they want for one last time then she returns to her grey little life. She hoped that she’ll survive this whole thing, although there were minutes, hours and even days when nothing interested her. She was just stroking Ash’s soft fur laying on the bed and listened to her purring. She was the only being on this world who’s never let her down, who never caused her pain. It wasn’t a coincidence that she loved animals more than humans. They were much simple and pure. They didn’t make her life bitter. She promised to herself that if this whole thing’ll be over, she’ll never fall in love again, even if this meant staying alone for the rest of her life.

Because she tried to busy herself with all kinds of things – mostly with learning – the feared day has arrived soon. She had to leave for the clinic. She didn’t tell the boys when she will go, because it was meaningless. Dave was crystal clear – he wasn’t interested in them and the fact that he didn’t came into the hospital proved this… because “he had no time”, and Mart hurt her deeply. Maybe he should have let her die from the overdose. Maybe that way he could have spared her from those daggers which he twisted in her bleeding heart again and again during their last conversation.

She already changed into the hospital gown and waited for the assistant to call her into the other room where the surgery will take place. She was fighting with her tears when she imagined how different things could have been, if the boys or just Martin had seen things from a different angle. If she could give birth to the baby and they could raise it together – watching its first steps, listening to its first words… She mused about the sex of the baby and tried to guess its father and whom it’d have resembled after a while…  
The arrival of the assistant pulled her back to reality. The short blond woman asked her quietly to follow her and she did, wiping away a teardrop. She entered the room and looked around. Ice-cold horror crept up on her spine when she saw the prepared table and the tools. Was this really the way she wanted to become a killer? That’s it? She hesitated. How would she be able to get square with herself ever again? She swallowed hard and took a step towards the doctor. She didn’t even hear his reassuring words. How would she be able to look into the mirror after this? And after all… why should she do this sacrifice for the guys? She doesn’t owe them anything now! They’ve left her, they gave up on her and the baby. She could tell them that she did the abortion and she could live her own life. After this she won’t meet them ever again, anyway… Maybe she could figure out things. She could take more jobs and would work until she was able before the labor… And she could finish the university on a correspondence course. Even if she would have to starve at the beginning, she’d be able to earn the money for the things the baby would need… No, she cannot do this. She just cannot do this…

“No” she said out loud too and she just noticed that tears were pouring down her face “I cannot do this. I cannot kill it” she finally looked at the doctor, who asked her with an understanding look if she was sure about it. And then she realized that she was. She has been sure about it earlier too, she just didn’t dare to believe that she can deal with the situation alone! Cuz she lived through so many things already, she had dealt with so many hard situations. She will survive this too! What the hell was she doing here? She nodded to the doctor’s question and turned around to go to the next room and change back her clothes. Her next step will be to ask an appointment from her gynecologist to do all the necessary tests to be sure that the baby was healthy. She didn’t care that the boys will never know that one of them will become a father again after a few months time. She didn’t care. This baby will be just hers. It won’t have a father, but she’ll try to give it everything that’ll be needed. She wants this baby, even if its two dads aren’t interested. She won’t leave it, she won’t throw it away. She will let it live, because this child is innocent. There was a reason why it wants to be born and she won’t stop it in this. It was the hardest decision in her life, but she felt that she did the right thing.

\---

Dave was sitting in a hotel room, totally fallen apart. He’s lost a lot of weight and his clothes didn’t fit him anymore. His phone was still open. Hours have passed since his emergency call. He was waiting patiently – what else could he have done? He lazily counted the minutes, but it happened that sometimes more minutes got lost – and it occurred more often. No, he didn’t want to faint now. Not again. Time after time a muscle strained or he shook his head as if a fly disturbed him. The starving made him hallucinate so sometimes he mumbled something incomprehensible. Mainly he said offenses to his monsters that were torturing his mind and soul. The spot where he was sitting on the floor was full of every kind of garbage – empty bottles and metal boxes as he pumped alcohol and sugar into his system. A few days ago he cut his hand very badly and because he didn’t do anything about it, it became purulent from the infection. His hair got a bit longer and his stubbles slowly turned into a beard. But he didn’t move just waited.

He heard some noises from outside, but he couldn’t decide whether it was just his imagination again, or it really happened. Slowly it became difficult for him to separate the reality and the products of his mind. But when he heard the banging again, he knew that it was real this time. He moaned quietly as he tried to make some noise and after some tries he could finally say a “come in” on a very hoarse tone.

The door opened immediately and the man who entered didn’t seem to be surprised, just the pupils of his green eyes narrowed as he stopped in the door with a paper bag in his hand. According to the incoherent phone call he had time to prepare for this. He sighed and shook his head while he put down the bag on the floor, walked to the singer and kicked a few glasses and bottles away so he could kneel in front of him. He took the pale face into his hands and sized up the damage. “Dave…” he sighed resignedly while he asked himself who’d come to help him if he let himself fall apart like this.

“Mart…” he whispered, but couldn’t say anything more, he just grabbed his arm desperately “I’m sorry, Mart… don’t be mad at me…”

Mart didn’t answer just grabbed Dave’s arms and checked the crooks of them. He grimaced when he saw a smaller cut next to one of his tattoos and a crappy wound on his other hand. “Which number is this?” he asked on a careworn tone, holding up three fingers to him. He saw that it was difficult for Dave to focus.

“I didn’t want… I really didn’t want… I know that she was yours… but… but…” and he couldn’t take it anymore – he began sobbing.

“What are you talking about, Dave?” he asked but didn’t listen completely, because he was still checking how bad his condition was.

“I love her! And we left her… alone… and we killed… we killed our own… our own…”

The blond man stopped examining Dave and pulled back a bit to look at him seriously. The pain doubled in his green eyes.

“We killed it!” the brown man yowled and his tears flowed unstoppable “Killer! Murderers! How much does a life count?!”

“Dave, shhh, calm down. I’m here now” Martin came around, pushing his pain back inside. It yowled inside with every word the singer said, it cried out loud in him like Dave did moments ago. “Come on, get up! We go to the bathroom. Come on!”

“Martin… you’re the only one I have now… only you…” he panted.

“It’s not true. You have your family, Dave, you know that” he stood up then he leant down and reached under his armpit to lift him. It wasn’t easy but he managed to make him stand up on his weak legs.

“Not anymore…” he whispered.

“What are you talking about? Don’t say silly things” Mart murmured concentrating on taking Dave into the bathroom in one piece.

“Martin! I’m in the middle of my divorce!” he snapped and it seemed that his sanity has returned for a moment, but then his eyes became hazy again.

“WHAT??” he stopped and had to concentrate not to let Dave go in his shock.

“I told… I told it to Jen. I couldn’t live as if everything was alright when it’s not!”

“Dave, what did you tell her? What did you tell her exactly?!” Martin freaked out after pushing Dave down on the edge of the bathtub and he grabbed his shoulders to keep his balance.

“I told her about Anita. That I’ve met her… that I’ve slept with her… that it happened several times…”

“Tell me that you said only this much to her! Dave! You told her only this, didn’t you?!”

“Ye..yeah. She doesn’t know about you.”

“Alright. I mean I know that it’s not alright, but… anyway… I think you understand. I’m not happy, Dave, not happy at all. And I’m sorry” he said and looked into the cloudy eyes then he started dragging down his clothes “Come, we take a shower.”

“Yes, that… that’ll be good… that’ll be good…” he murmured, getting lost in his own world again.

The blonde man sighed deeply and started pulling his mate together. First he washed him then after rubbing him dry he helped him into some boxers with much difficulty and made him sit down on the bed. He was still shocked how much weight he has lost, but he’s seen him in worse condition too. He quickly called Dave’s doctor, whom he trusted and after updating him about Dave’s condition he called him there. While they were waiting for the doc’s arrival, Mart tried to force some water and food down on Dave’s throat. When he saw that the singer seemed more like himself he asked “Dave, you didn’t take any drugs, did you?”

“No. Nothing. No… in that case I would have seen horrible things.”

“Alright. I’m glad. Okay Dave, everything’ll be fine. Your doctor is on his way. He’ll take care of your wounds and he’ll examine you. You’ll be better.”

“No… none of this will get better… I would never be able to wash down the blood from my hands… Mart… we didn’t do anything! We did nothing...”

“I tried, but… I used the wrong words. I could have stopped it. It’s not your fault. This whole thing is my fault” he said seriously, but detachedly.

“You tried?” he looked at him.

“In the hospital. But I was still confused. I didn’t know what to do. None of us knew. And I just repeated what’d be the best, that… It’s not important, the main point is that she sent me away and told me that… she’ll do what we asked her to do. Yes, Dave. We’re murderers. We cannot change this” he put his arm around his friend’s shoulder “I’m sorry, but we have to live with this burden.”

“What do you think, what would it have been? A boy or a girl? Whom would have it resembled? I wonder if the baby liked music too…” Dave said apathetically “If it was a boy, I’d have taken him to play baseball or to the beach… we would’ve race on a big sailboat, swim and we would have went fishing and laugh a lot. If it was a girl, I’d have taught to her how to play on the piano. I, alone. I’d have read out loud for her at evenings or I’d have crooned a lullaby into her ear. I’m sure she’d have been a pet-person and on one of her birthdays I’d have bought a little puppy or kitty for her. I would have comforted her if she was sad or I’d have laughed with her if she was happy. I’d have given her advices in case she asked. I’d have supported her to start her life and would have watched as she gets her degree. We’d have celebrated Christmas together and I’d have taken her to England. To our homeland. But none of this will happen.”

Martin felt that her whole body started shaking from the suppressed crying. Then he couldn’t take it anymore and started sobbing, because all these things – with different pictures – have already ran through his mind. He’ll never forgive himself that he’d ruined the lives of two – no, three – people including his.

Dave couldn’t cry anymore. He’s lived through every possible pain. He was just sitting there silently while he slowly pulled Martin to him.


	19. Chapter 19

19.

Martin really fell apart after he managed to pull Dave together a bit. He constantly cursed himself because of the things that happened – he felt that everything was his fault. He played the “what ifs” hundreds of times in his head. He was torturing himself with them, because he thought he deserved it. His pain was nowhere compared to Anita’s. A few times the emotions and the thoughts were too overwhelming, as they washed over him, pushing him in and out of his own little closed world and reality – and he couldn’t bear it anymore, he started drinking after a long while. He was at home, alone, sitting in his living room and drank everything he could reach, but things just got worse this way, because he could feel the pain and the lack of this child much sharper. Millions of such pictures flashed in front of his eyes like the ones Dave lined up earlier – from a better future. And this went on until he yelled and sobbed loudly. After this he didn’t reach for the bottle again, he just let this feeling eat him up alive from the inside.

Meanwhile Dave rested at home. He got better slowly, but he never slid back that far like when Mart found him. His hand got some stitches and he still has to take the antibiotics. He tried to slowly move on, he tried to busy himself with his divorce and pay attention on his lawyer, while he considered selling his apartment, because it was way too big for one person. His life became frighteningly empty.

\---

Martin stayed in this state for weeks. And the worst thing was that he had no inspiration to busy himself with work. Of course he tried to pull himself together as best as he could so that they could return to the issues of the band, but because Dave was still recovering too, Mart had some time and they postponed the meetings as well. Of course everyone thought that the reason was Dave’s divorce that he wanted to concentrate on that and they knew that he was going through a difficult period now. Martin hid his pain in front of the others, only Dave knew what kind of things were going on in his mind – although they rarely met. Both of them wanted to process and deal with this thing alone and they called each other just in case one of them needed some support. Martin’s mind was on Anita a lot. He tried to guess when she could have gone to the clinic, how she could deal with the abortion and what she could do at the moment. Did she flee into learning? Maybe she has already moved from the small apartment to leave this painful chapter of her life behind.

The worst thing was that Mart still didn’t know what to do with himself. He wanted to respect Anita’s request not to go near her anymore, but he was worried about her – especially after the “suicide attempt”… And his visit by Dave in that cheap motel just stirred him up even more, although a few weeks have passed since then… Well, if he looked back, this painful thing has been going on in the last 3 months, but he still felt as if it was just yesterday. His emotions didn’t calm down as he would have expected. He still loved her in the same way, he still missed her. The nights were the worst when he was just tossing and turning from the guilt. He couldn’t sleep and this was visible on him. He lost some weight too, although he tried to pay attention on himself. But the constant worrying and thinking weren’t good for him. He started to turn into his own shadow, although he didn’t touch a single bottle since that one time.

After one sleepless night he couldn’t take it anymore… He took a shower with the decision that he tries to pull himself together as best as he can and no matter what, he’ll go and visit Anita to be sure that she was okay. Even if she yells at him everything that comes into her mind, he still wants to see her, with his own eyes to be sure she is alright.

\---

Meanwhile Anita didn’t know anything about this. She didn’t even want to think on Depeche Mode either, although sometimes she couldn’t stop herself and while she was sitting in a net café, she googled them. To distract her thoughts she rather concentrated on the baby, which has already started growing in her tummy. It didn’t matter who was its father, she’ll love this child very much whatever may come. One day she woke up in an especially good mood. She took a nice big walk in the sunshine and her whole morning turned out great. She was tidying up her place when she heard the knock on the door. She curiously walked there and peeked out on the loophole to see who it was. Then she was taken aback with fear as she saw the blond man. She didn’t move. Maybe he’ll go away if she pretended that she wasn’t at home.

But he felt that she was there. And he saw the light coming from under the door and where else could she be around 8 pm? He waited patiently and knocked again. “Anita… Anita please, open the door” he asked quietly and gently.

She knew that turning off the lights now would be quite strange. “What do you want?” she said finally.

“I would like to see you. I couldn’t take it anymore… without you” he said silently leaning to the door. He nearly nuzzled to the wood as he grabbed the doorframe with one hand, while the other was holding a single rose.

“But I don’t want to see you! Go away!”

“Anita, please… I cannot take it anymore without you! I’ve been thinking about this a lot in the last few months… I’m so sorry! I was stupid and confused and I made the worst decisions… Please, Anita… I still love you the same…” he propped his forehead on the door with a little thud.

“But you were able to ask me to kill the baby. And the possibility was there that you were its father!”

“Yes, I know! And I’ve been cursing myself since then! I was such an idiot! I shouldn’t have asked this from you! Neither I nor Dave had the right to ask this… We could have figured it out somehow! And now killing a human being lies on our head…” he whispered hoarsely with sunken shoulders “It was such…” he began but he couldn’t go on from the lump in his throat.

Anita suppressed her anger “What?”

“It was such…” he swallowed hard “a big mistake from us! From me! If I could turn back time, I’d not do it this way. I’d be on your side, helping you and… and we could raise the baby together. Oh god, Anita, I’m so sorry that I exposed you to this! I know that probably there’s no forgiveness for this… I go if you want me, but please, let me look into your eyes one more time. I’d like to see your face. See with my own eyes that you’re alright… Then I go if you really want me to.”

She sighed. His voice seemed honest and gave a hint of the great pain and suffering he was going through. But she didn’t want to make more mistakes… but then her hand slowly reached for the lock and soon she turned it. The door slowly opened. She wasn’t sure about this, because she kept the baby and she was afraid that his feelings will change with a scenic blaze of anger.

First Martin felt surprised, because he didn’t think that she’ll listen to his begging. Then he forgot to breathe when his eyes slid lower from the unsure face and he ran them over her whole body. It got stuck immediately on her tummy. Although its size wasn’t that big, but it was obvious that it wasn’t about some plus kilos. Suddenly he couldn’t talk either and he felt that his emotions got stirred up as fast as birds fly when something frightens them. For a moment he glimpsed at Anita’s face, still in disbelief. He saw on her that she was afraid of his reaction, but he didn’t care about that right now. He just fell onto his knees still in the door and without thinking he slid his hand onto the small tummy as he cried out happily. In the next moment his tears were flowing.

First Anita squeaked in her surprise from his strange reaction and looked down at him surprised.

“Oh my god! Oh my god!” Martin moaned with relief and pressed his lips to her tummy. Within a moment he tugged up the T-shirt and after a short laugh he gave his wet kisses on the naked skin.

“Mart…? Are you okay?” she asked him unsure.

“You have to ask?! Of course I am?! Oh my god, Anita, so you kept it?! I’m so, so, so happy! You cannot imagine! Anita, Anita…” he murmured at the end and pressed his face to her tummy to feel them both closer. His shocked panting slowly turned into sobbing that shook his whole body as he was still on his knees hugging her to him.

“Hey… come… come in…” she said softly, although she still couldn’t understand him. In one minute he’s angry about the baby and in the other he’s happy? But she put this aside now and pulled him up from the floor and invited him in. Martin was still shocked as he followed her.

Anita’s mouth nearly fell open as more light came down on him “You’re not… not the Martin I remembered” she said a bit confused as she slowly sized him up from head to toe. He was skinny, his cheeks were hollow and big dark circles were under his eyes.

He looked aside for a moment, because he felt uneasy from the way she just said that was on her mind – usually he loved this in her. But he knew well what she was talking about. “I didn’t lie to you when I told you that I couldn’t think of anything else than this…” he said quietly.

“How long haven’t you eaten?”

Mart just shrugged and his eyes turned sad as he sat down next to her on the bed.

“Come on” she said and walked to the kitchen to find some food for him.

“Are you two okay?” Martin followed her. He didn’t care about his own condition, he was more interested in the baby and Anita “You have everything? And why did you keep it? By the way I’m very happy about it! Very, very happy!” he began to jabber as his head got filled with millions of questions he wanted to ask - which wasn’t too common by him “When’ll you know if it’s a girl or a boy? Is it healthy?”

“Relax” she tried to calm him down while she put down a plate full of fresh pasta with some vegetables and sauce “I still don’t know its sex. And yes, it seems that it’s healthy. I kept it, because I felt that you didn’t have the right to make this decision, treating it as if it was just an object and not a person.”

“I’m truly very sorry Anita and I regretted it. There’s no word for how stupid I was! But I’m really happy that both of you are okay! Do you need anything?”

“We’re okay. But you don’t look so well” she noted again and now her voice showed that she was worried.

“I don’t care what’s with me. You’re more important now” he shrugged again.

“Don’t let yourself go this much. After all you have the chance that you’re its father. And what should I tell to the baby if something happens to you, hm?”

“I’ll be okay. But you should talk now! How’s the pregnancy going?”

“It’s okay, although the nausea at the beginning gave me some hard time and it didn’t help either that I had to get through it alone. But then I got the run of it and my stomach is okay too. And what do you want from me now?” she looked into the green eyes with his own grey ones.

“I’m open for everything in case I can be near to you two. I don’t care about anything else. I want to take responsibility if you let me do so. I don’t even care if the baby is Dave’s. I want to give you everything you two need.”

“Would you undertake it?”

“Yes” he said seriously.

She nodded and it seemed that a faint smile appeared on her face “And what’s with Dave?” she asked.

“Well… a lot have happened to him lately” he rather pulled the plate closer to him and avoided her eyes.

“What kind of things?” she asked as she sat down next to him.

“Well, as a start he totally fell apart” he said then he rather started eating, although he wasn’t hungry – but this way he didn’t have to talk.

“He got high again? Wonderful…” she grimaced with disgust.

“No…” he quickly swallowed the food “He didn’t use drugs. Just… well drank and let himself go. You cannot imagine how he looked like. I had to drag him back from his half-insane state” he stared at the table with dark eyes from the memories.

“Half-insane? I highly doubt that. After all he has a quite comfortable life with his wife and kids.”

“Not anymore” he sighed.

“What do you mean? Did he regret his sins?” she laughed coldly.

“He’s in the middle of his divorce. And even if you think that he takes things easily, you’re wrong. His divorce and losing you were hard for him. Mostly the latter one.”

“Sure. But he still ‘didn’t have the time’ to come to the hospital. So… now I ‘don’t have the time’ to deal with him either!” she stated a bit angrily.

“Anita… He totally regretted everything. You should have seen him how bad his condition was. He still looks bad, but he tries to pull himself together.”

“Sure. But he wasn’t the one who nearly died from the pain he caused to me! He’s a cruel man and I wish him to go through what I had to survive! He never called me! He never showed me anything from his big ‘remorse’! At least you wanted to know what’s with me, but he wasn’t interested!”

“Anita, you really don’t see why he acted like this. Yes, it’s true that it was a bad thing that he didn’t come to the hospital. Back then he was still angry. Later he regretted it, but then he was already afraid of you. Do you want to see how he looked like when I found him? Here, I took some pictures of him to shove it under his nose if he starts to slide down again. This can still stop him” he pulled out his cell and gave it to her then he leant back and pushed away the food he barely touched.

She took the phone reluctantly and looked at the pictures. Her face slowly started to show her shock “Oh my god, Dave…” she whispered “What did you do to yourself?!” Finally she couldn’t look at the pictures and put the phone down with tears in her eyes.

Martin knew what was going on in her mind, because the sight burned itself into his mind as well - like some ugly things from Dave’s junky past, when he let the singer down. “See? If I tell you that he’d totally fallen apart, then he really did” he said quietly and took his cell back.

“Wouldn’t it have been easier for him to call me? Where’s he now?” she looked up at him.

“He doesn’t dare to look into your eyes after what had happened. By the way he’s in New York. He’s searching for another flat and he’s busy with his divorce.”

She sighed “This shouldn’t have ended like this.”

“No, you’re right. But nothing’s lost yet, if you don’t close us out” a little smile crossed his face “We still can fix this mistake.”

“You really believe in this?” she looked at him again. It seemed that the old light and hope were broken in her eyes.

“Yes. I don’t know how things with Dave will go, but I’m ready to take responsibility for anything that may come. Since then you turned 21 too. Although this doesn’t influence me. I’m not here because of this. I’d say the same even if you were still minor” he folded his arms in front of his chest. 

“Oh Mart!” she cried out and was already in his neck “You don’t know how much this means to me! I was so scared!”

“I know! I know…” he whispered into her hair as he held her tightly. He was a bit surprised from this sudden change of mood, but it felt really good to him. Now he dared to hope. “And I’m sorry that we left you alone in this difficult situation. I let you alone and I’ll never forgive this to myself…” he stroked her long hair.

“But you came back and that’s the most important thing now” she mumbled.

“Really? This… this means that we’re good?”

“It rather means that things are getting better.”

“Yeah, I meant it that way” he risked a little smile still holding her and looking into her eyes. For a moment he hesitated then he softly and shortly kissed the well-known lips. And she returned the kiss. She didn’t want anything else just enjoy the peace she found in Martin’s arms.

\---

Dave was sitting in the living room of his new and much smaller apartment and scratched the scar on his hand with a pensive look. Slowly he gained some weight back, although he was still broken. The divorce was hard for him. Jen acted very aggressively, she wanted both kids to herself and didn’t want Dave to see them. He didn’t let this happen so a long fight has started at court. They still didn’t have any results and this was just another drop that added to his gloomy mood. Slowly he’ll lose everything. Just the band has left for him, but right now it couldn’t comfort him either. 

He jumped a bit from the sound of the intercom then he stood up and pushed a button “Yes?”

“Hi Dave” he heard Martin’s voice. It has been a long time since he sounded this cheerful “I thought I’ll visit you. I have news.”

“Come up” he answered and pushed another button, which opened the door downstairs and Martin could step in.

The blond man was soon up on the top floor – of course Dave rented an apartment there. Martin knew that this wasn’t only because of his megalomania, but because this way he could feel himself a bit separated from the noisy city he lived in. He impatiently waited for the singer to let him in. Soon the door opened and Dave stood there then he let his mate in.

“I have good news” Mart said as he entered the flat. He’s been here already when Dave moved in. He found it nice, but Dave still had to buy some things into it. Mart went straight into the kitchen and put the paper bag on the counter then he started putting the fresh pastries onto a plate.

“And what are they?” Dave leant against the doorframe.

Martin grinned widely and at an easy pace he started organizing the pastries.

“Will you tell me?” Dave smiled while he stole one from the plate and started eating it. In exchange the sugar on it gave him a nice white moustache. 

Mart giggled – which he did a long time ago – and grabbing Dave’s nape he pulled him close for a quick kiss to lick down the sugar from his lips “It’s about Anita” he let the singer go.

Dave chose the wrong time to inhale, because from Mart’s sentence the sugar went into his nose and he had to cough from it. “What’s with her?” he asked after he could finally breathe again.

“I think first you should swallow the food” he said and put down his cheese-cake as well.

“Is it this serious?” he asked and obeyed to Mart.

“Well yeah!” he said and barely could stop a smile “Dave… Anita’s kept the baby…”

“What did she do?!” he asked shocked, but it was 100% pure surprise.

“The baby’s alive and both of them are healthy!” he grinned from the bottom of his heart.

Dave smiled “And why did she keep it?”

“When I visited her yesterday she said that she wasn’t able to do it. Geez, Dave, you should see her! She already has a small round tummy and she’s just more beautiful when she’s pregnant!” Martin sighed.

“And what are your plans now? You want to take her home and be a daddy, as if it was totally normal?”

“I don’t know yet. I’d like the three of us to sit down and talk about the future. I don’t want to leave out anybody – especially not you, because the chances are the same, you can be the baby’s father as well.”

“I’m in. I hope that we’ll find some kind of a solution, because I’d like us to finally live in peace… although… I don’t know whether we can use the word ‘family’ in this case” Dave mused. Even if he couldn’t make any of his marriages work yet, he’s been always a family person.

“Everything’ll slowly work out. But Dave, I hope you know that you have to go to her alone too, before we sit down and talk about these things. You’ve hurt her very much.”

“Then it seems that she didn’t see why I did things this way.”

“Nope, Dave… but you could explain this to me as well, cuz you never gave me an answer. I rather listened to my intuitions when I talked about you to Anita.”

“You want to know the whys?”

“Yes. I’d be curious” he took a big bite from his cake.

“I don’t really know… maybe it was because the pain. It was quite unbearable.”

“I see” he sighed which set off a little cloud of sugar. He giggled again, but meanwhile he thought that Dave doesn’t have to tell him more, because he’s been there too. Dave joined him – he laughed and ate as well.


	20. Chapter 20

20.

The young girl enjoyed the flavor of the tomato sauce she was cooking and which she’ll eat with some cooked meat. And her dessert will be some fruits. She started to really like such vitamin bomb dishes lately and now she choose to eat them willingly because of the baby. She was by her doctor today and he said that the baby was doing well. She was already thinking about names. Now she was much calmer that she knew that she can count on Martin. He’s been there two weeks ago and since then he visited her nearly every day to check on them, asking if they needed anything. She was a bit moved from this and she started to believe that the blond man was really serious about this whole thing.

She stirred the thick sauce one more time then she turned off the stove. Her small flat was filled with the nice scent of food, which she could finally enjoy – not like at the beginning of her pregnancy. From this thought her smile faded a bit, because the memory came back to her when she felt sick from the smells for the first time… at Dave’s place. This memory seemed very distant and cold. Although she wasn’t that mad at the singer like earlier, but she still had an edge on him. But she shook her head and walked to the fridge to pour some mineral water for her lunch. In that moment someone knocked on her door.

She smiled. She knew that Martin won’t be able not to visit them again. She quickly rubbed her hands in the kitchen clot and hurried to the door to open it, but when she did, her smile faded away.

“Hi” the deep baritone said as the singer – who wasn’t wearing black this time – could set an eye on her.

“Dave… what… what are you doing here?” she asked and didn’t even notice that she put her hand on her tummy right away.

“Martin came to me and I thought that I should come. Will you let me in?” he smiled faintly.

“And you needed two weeks again to come?” she murmured under her nose, but she stepped aside to let him in.

“Yes, Anita, two weeks. You know a lot of things kept me from coming. First some medical attendance at the hospital then the stupid things of my ex-wife” Dave answered on a harder tone than necessary as he heard that Anita could think just on herself and on her problems again.

“You can go, if you find the situation uncomfortable” she still kept her hand on the door handle and swallowed her anger that quickly rose in her.

“I’m not here to go away. It’s just that it’d be nice if you’d see further than your own problems.”

“I’m sorry that in my situation where you’ve left me, I think about the baby and myself and about our happiness” she noted on a slightly cynical tone as she closed the door and passed Dave to head for the kitchen.

“I know that we’ve let you down and I understand that you’re angry now. It’s just… you know… this whole situation was so complicated and we, I handled it the wrong way. It was frightening to hear that you’re pregnant. Then as it sank in, as time passed I began thinking about it a lot and I couldn’t accept my own decision, but then I thought that I was already too late. Then Martin came to me and told me that you’ve kept the baby, and I’m very happy about that. Really. And now I’m here to make things right.”

“Alright” she sighed and folded her arms in front of her chest “Do you want something to eat or drink?”

“No, thanks. But I think we should sit down” he pointed at the kitchen table and sat down. When he was sitting comfortably and put both of his hands on the table, he unwillingly started scratching his scar – lately he did this when he was lost in his thoughts or if he was nervous.

“Do you mind if I eat? We’re quite hungry here” she added with a little smile.

“I don’t mind” he smiled too and watched her as she put some food onto her plate and sat down.

She still had that little smile in the corner of her lips as she started eating and in between two bites her expression changed into a bit more serious “What’d happened to your hand?”

“Nothing special” he covered it with his other hand “I cut it, it got infected and purulent.”

“Oh… I guess it was then…” she said, but rather swallowed the rest of the sentence and just watched him while chewing.

“Yes, then” he nodded “I don’t really know what to say. I’m sorry about my behavior and I’ve regretted it thousands of times since then.”

“Tell me Dave…” she sighed not paying attention – but storing – his apology “… how do you feel about the baby and me? How did you imagine this?”

“Anita, I’d like to be a part of this. I really want to do what I can, because it’s possible that I’m the father of the baby and I’d like to fill this role. And… I love you” he looked into her eyes.

“Really?” she examined his face.

“Really” he answered seriously.

“And what if it turns out? What’ll be with the band and your lives?” she pushed a piece of meet in the sauce “It’ll affect you even if you’re not the father. And if you are then it’d even more…”

“IF it turns out then it’ll be a big fall, but I think we knew the risks even at the beginning. And what’ll be with my life? It’s already in ruins so it doesn’t really matter” he shrugged.

“Oh David…” she whispered. She was moved and in the next moment she was already sitting on his lap sideways as she put her arm around his shoulder “So you see a way out of this in us?” she whispered.

“Rather a new life.”

“That’s the same” she smiled and caressed the careworn face “You’re so spent and look shattered…” she gently stroked along his temple.

“I feel that way” he sighed “Jen wants to take away my daughter” he looked up. He didn’t know why he told this to Anita. She was the only one who knew about it besides the lawyers, the judge, Jen and himself.

“You poor thing” she wiped away a single teardrop from the corner of his eye as it settled in the small wrinkles “Can I help you in any way?”

“Unless you can change the judge’s verdict… Because the judge tends to let Stella stay by her mother.”

“But you can have custody rights, can’t you?”

“Theoretically. But if they get to know about our triangle, he’ll take that away from me too.”

“Then… then you don’t really want us to get closer again?” she looked at him unsure as her stroking hand stopped as well.

“I didn’t say that. Because there’s a new life growing inside of you, which can come from me too. I need you both” he smiled.

“But… I cannot expect you to risk all these things for me or for the baby… especially because… because ‘officially’ I’m just with Martin” she added carefully.

“Look Anita, I think that we cannot really separate this triangle anyomre. We gave so many things in it per head that maybe it’ll connect us forever. The responsibility is common.”

“Alright… if you really want to risk this much…” she shrugged a bit and looked him deeply in the eye as she stroked along the full lower-lip.

“This or the other possibility: sitting alone in my empty flat. I choose the first option, because I want to live with you as much as possible.”

“Oh god, I missed you so much!” she softened up even more and her tears started to run down her face as she couldn’t hold herself back and pressed her lips to Dave’s.

He held her tightly and returned her kisses. Maybe he can be finally happy.

“You won’t hurt me this much anymore, will you?” she sniffed into his neck.

“No. I don’t have to fear from anything now that would make me do so.”

“Good then” she loosened her embrace to look into his eyes and she gave him an honest smile “Both your daughter and I are happy about this…” she bit her lower-lip, watching his reaction.

“It’s a she?” Dave asked back.

“Uh-uh” she nodded fighting with her tears. The hormonal changes were really getting on her nerves since the beginning of her pregnancy. She cried a lot compared to herself. “I was by my doctor today and he told me that it’s nearly completely sure that it’s a little girl. Even Mart doesn’t know about it. I told you first.”

Dave couldn’t say anything more. There was a radiating and wide smile on his face as he slowly slid his hand onto her tummy. Two teardrops ran down her face as first she just watched the big hand on her stomach then she put her own on it too and searched for his softened look. “And… wouldn’t it bother you if it turns out that it’s not yours?”

“No. But I think I don’t want to know who the father is.”

“You don’t want to know?” she looked at him surprised.

“Nope.”

“Well… sooner or later she’ll start to look more like her father…” she caressed Dave’s shoulder.

“Yes, but this’ll be the exciting part. And by the way I don’t mind if Mart’s the father. He’s my part just as much as you are.”

“Jesus, Dave, don’t tell me such things, cuz I’ll cry again” she ‘threatened’ him.

“But that’s the truth” he looked at her with big eyes.

“Dave…” she cuddled to him desperately.

“Yes?”

“Do you still want me?”

“Sure. Why?”

“If you really do then make love to me, please…” she whispered faintly onto his mouth.

“You’re a pervert lil minx, you know, don’t you?”

“Why? I’ve missed you! You think that I haven’t imagined you in such situations since the last time I saw you?”

“Would you go into the details?” he asked with a dark smile.

“And I imagined you sometimes even when I was with Martin… As his body rediscovered mine sometimes it was as if I made love with the both of you at the same time… Oh my, David…” she sighed “… I want you so badly…”

“Then let’s do something about that” he said and kissed her sensually while his hands already started wandering. Anita returned his kisses more passionately. She was still in that period of her pregnancy when she wanted sex often.

Dave didn’t hesitate for too long and soon he took her into the bedroom. Now he didn’t want to risk doing it on the top of the table.

“Don’t tell me that you get horny from pregnant women as well!” she giggled when Dave growled lusciously in the moment he saw her naked tummy.

“I’m an animal, Anita!” he laughed and bit the soft skin with his teeth, continuing this as he moved downwards.

“Hmm… you could be a bit gentler, you wild animal…” she sighed referring to the fact that her body became more sensitive lately. She already dragged his T-shirt over his head then she stroked along the warm tattooed skin lustfully.

“How gentle do you want me to be?” Dave purred and switched his teeth to his tongue.

“Ohhhh… something like this!” she moaned towards the ceiling “I want to feel those beautiful hands everywhere on my body! I’ve missed them so much…” she dug into Dave’s hair.

“You’ll get them” the answer came and he soon fulfilled her wish.

Finally Anita could let herself - and the rest of the tension she felt because of Dave - go. Now she knew that everything will be fine – even if they’ll have hard periods in their lives. As she looked down at the singer who was gently kissing her tummy, she could nearly see as the deep wrinkles that were caused by his problems started to slowly disappear. Or at least those which were caused by her and the baby. Dave pulled her pants and panties down and one of his long fingers slowly penetrated her.

“Oh god, that’s it!” she moaned and her hips started to move from the slow pampering. She didn’t know that because of the pregnancy she’ll feel their touches more intensely. She had to cry out loud while she pulled him closer by his nape. Her eyes became hazy and felt very grateful, because his fingers didn’t stop moving. She took his slightly stubbly face between her hands and looked him deeply in the eye “I love you, Dave…” she whispered barely audible. This was the first time she said it out loud.

“I love you too” he answered and gave her a long kiss while he felt his heart racing.

She smiled and stroked along his face then when Dave asked her, she turned to her side and waited for him to lay down behind her and position himself. When it happened, he penetrated her slowly. He didn’t want to go too deep, because of the baby. She moaned faintly from the long-awaited feeling and she squeezed the embracing hand on her tummy, while she turned her head back and offered her thirsty lips for a deep kiss. And Dave wanted to give her everything she needed. He kissed her without stopping while he gave her his slow and deep thrusts. She didn’t need too much time - soon she came laying in Dave’s arms and scent. He pulled her tightly to him, burying his face into her neck until he could finally sink into a calm and deep sleep.


	21. Chapter 21

21.

Anita was standing on the balcony of Martin’s house. She moved here months ago. They’ve decided that it’ll be the best. She didn’t quit the university just switched to the correspondence course, because it became very tiring to go in to the classes with her big tummy. They managed to arrange their lives and under this she meant not just Martin but Dave too. Sadly Stella had to stay with her mother and this hurt Dave very much, but she and Martin did everything to prevent the singer from falling back into one of his deep abysses in his soul. They explained to him that this wasn’t the end of the world, because he can see Stella and Jimmy as much as he wants to. Although Jimmy wasn’t his son, he loved him like that. And now a new baby was on her way. She’ll be able to busy him and help him to forget about all of his sorrows. Dave understood this and his positive thoughts have returned.

Since then everything was perfect. The dark-haired man visited them often, sometimes he slept over too. Sadly he couldn’t live with them, because that’d have been too suspicious, but they were already working on solving this problem. Dave was even ready to leave New York for his new family. Because slowly the three of them became a real family. And soon the new member of the family will arrive too.

Sometimes Anita laughed on the boys or was moved by them to tears when they tried to give her everything and they planned their future. She could barely stop them because they nearly always wanted to touch her round tummy and they even talked and sang to their daughter. But she didn’t mind it, because she was more than happy, if we don’t count the smaller discomforts. Her love for the boys couldn’t have been stronger and she couldn’t wait to hold that fragile little girl that was growing in her body. They didn’t have to wait for much longer.

 

Epilog

 

Anita was sitting in the garden with a smile on her face as she watched her daughter playing with Dave. The little girl had a big smile on her face as she played along her part and squeaked happily as she tried to run away from the man, who caught her easily. Two years have passed since she was born. Anita didn’t ask for a DNA test, because she felt that she would just ruin everything the three of them have built up and it wasn’t that important for her to know who their daughter’s real father was. Both men loved her as their own blood and they played a lot with her.

Luckily, Haley – who got her name from Dave – handled the situation well. She didn’t make a difference between the two of them. It seemed that she loved them the same way. She called both of them as her daddy.

Anita wouldn’t have thought that the four of them can live in such a harmony. With time it became natural that Dave came when he could and stayed with them – practically he was already living with them, he went back to New York just from pretence and because of his kids. The band members were very surprised from the arrival of Haley, who gave some hard minutes to her young mother when she gave her life in the hospital.

Anita couldn’t believe that she was growing this fast. Since then she’s finished her studies too. She felt as if it was just yesterday when the labor has started. She could still see the picture of Dave’s and Mart’s worried face and she remembered their panic. Then she had to smile again from the memory when Martin held the newborn baby in his hands for the first time. He came into the labour room with her and Dave chewed his nails in the waiting room. But it was worth it to go through all this even just for the scene when she saw their moved looks as they held the baby in their hands for the first time. Anita often thought how lucky she was to have two such a wonderful – although sometimes really stubborn – men looking over her and Haley.

She had to confess that as her daughter got older, she searched for the signs that could give away who her father was. With her green eyes and blond hair she didn’t show too much. In this age nothing was sure, but her personality has already started to show. It was confusing, but it seemed that she got something from both of the men. Basically she was a calm kid like Mart. But when she decided something, she started working on solving the problem and getting what she wanted with such an élan like Dave. And this much was enough for Anita. The little girl belonged to all three of them.

 

 

THE END

 

 

By: Capricornus and Useless-girl  
14-07-2009

 

Translated by: Useless-girl  
12/10/2010


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